How do you explain the collapse of the marriage institution in the west?

Question

Many people live with a girlfriend or a boyfriend nowadays. Poeple are not interested in marriage, there are many divorces and social disintegration. How do you explain that?

Answer 1

There's no magic bullet, obviously, but here's a few key points that precipitated the decline of the western family...

1.) The deconstruction, by feminism, of the traditional family arrangment of working dad, housewife, and kids. More women are working and thus choosing to have less kids or even no kids. Because they are getting educated and working, women are no longer dependent upon the male for income. Hence, they are no longer getting married.

2.) The deconstruction of traditional sexual morality. It used to be that sex was only to be expressed within marriage. But now it's a veritable sexual bonanza and, hey, if you can get pleasure without getting married, there's no real compelling reason to actual make the substantial committment that is marriage.

3.) The notion of romantic love. Thanks to Hollywood, the latest heir to the Romantic Era of history, we all now believe that you should find your prince or princess charming, fall immediately in love, and never fall out of love (and if you do, of course, you just get a divorce). So young people are stuck with this fanciful notion that everything is about love and there's more real moral obligation to stay married if you've fallen out of love. What rubbish! You marry and make the commitment knowing precisely that no matter how strong the passion, how intense the love, you will stay faithful and true for eternity. That's what marriage means--not, 'until the sex isn't good' or 'until we feel like seeing other people.'

I must say that there still is hope. Surveys indicate that young people, especially girls, still wants a husband and lots of kids. But they're brainwashed by liberals in school and college and society generally. Parents need to take a stand for traditional morality and family. It may not be politically correct but, ironically, I think most people long for that return. We want equality for women but we don't want to lose the crutch of our society--the family--while achieving that equality. Being a stay at home mom is NOT degrading, giving your girls barbies and sons army men is NOT sexist. There's so much unrest and crime in society because the unravelling of the family. Perhaps we can give the old family structure another chance.

Answer 2

Due to the instant gratification factor - a lot of people don't put a lot of thought into marriage and when it becomes hard work find it easier to file for divorce than trying to work through their problems. On the other hand, it's also because a lot of the crap that use to go in marriages was taboo to discuss decades ago whereas now women will not put up with domestic violence, alcoholism and the like. So in that sense, society has progressed and marriage is no longer a means of stifling people.

Answer 3

This is very true! You brought up a very intense discussion. just as the other participant said, Instant gratification!!, selfishness, and having a society which thinks anything goes, the collapse of marriage is due to a lack of a good set of values, and it's mostly because of apathy that leaves a lot to be desired., lack of having good solid bases, a lack of vision, comittment, values & priorities from both men and women.

It is mainly due to the fact that nowadays many women are willing to give themselves freely sexually to men, and without a care as if they were going for a ride, as if it was nothing, simply an activity, and women have ruined & spoiled things when they give themselves freely to them, by disrespecting themselves and their bodies, they are ruinining the marriage institution and men don't have to do anything to go out and & hunt, they have made themselves so available, real relationships with substance have lost their value because of thist, because of the huge lack of respect women have for themselves, believe me it is almost 90% up to the woman & if women stopped such tendencies and decadent ways of doing things, a lot would change, women need to take their role back and stop giving themselves and allowing to be disrespected by living with a man who will never ask them to marry him, because they don't need to do anything any more, no need for marriage when I can have it for free. (Why get the cow, when I can have the milk for free kind of thing) I truly believe the rise on number of divorces & social disintegration is due to this factor, women have a lot to do with it, as long as things don't change in this arena, it is quite unlikely it will be different, on the contrary, it is about to get worse,. (decadence and a lack of values, lack of comitment is more evident each day) The question is does anyone care, or are people willing to do anything about it?, hmmmm doubtful! Parents these days allow their children and teenagers to do just about anything they want, they run around like if they had no parents, all the violence, sex, pornography, on television, movies, entertainment, etc., people act so nonchalant about it, as long as they continue to, nothing will chnage, and forget about mentioning God, that is so out & so out of style for them, heaven forbids they would. Oh no that is not allowed.
How then will there be guidence, substance and a strong foundation on the marriage institution if the western culture is walking on such shaky surface, the value system is gone, and nothing can stand in such ways with gobbly foundations and no walls.

Answer 4

Well, that's a hard question to answer.
First of all, you need to examine what group (age) are living
together and not married. It may be all ages. One reason
years ago people were called common law married. Just living together having kids and not married with paper.
Now, the law is lax. Parents are not strict as they use to be.
Too much exposer to sex on t.v. ,saying it's okay to sleep with some you are not married to.
Fear of disease, or mate might be on the down-low. or sugar in the tank. So, many things.
Women in careers,not wanting to be committed to motherhood, but want the companionship without strings.
It's just plain old narcissism, self indulged , self-seeking.
It's about me. It could be people want a win-win scenario.