i lost my virginity yesterday while no one was home. it wasnt quite what i expected it to be. i mean i thought it would be longer. he's had sex before and said it usually last 30min to an hour. but why did he finish so fast with me? he also told me because he was worried that someone would walk in on us.
it still felt good but is it always going to be like this?
is it normal for a guy to "finish" because of fear?
2007-03-18 12:00:49 · 37 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Wow! There are a variety of reasons for a guy to "finish" quicker than he wants. Fear is definitely a valid factor, especially if he was worried about getting caught in the act. More than likely, he was just very excited about his first encounter with you. If you had a lot of foreplay leading up to the actual act, he could have been very worked up.
Instead of being worried, you should concentrate on being flattered. Guys "finish" quickly if they are really turned-on.
Whatever you do, DO NOT make a big deal out of it. You can give a guy performance anxiety if you question his sexual skills.
I can promise that things will improve. A little more time and experience will give you a comfortable knowledge of each other. That will lead to a more gratifiying experience for both of you.
Believe me, no guy wants sex to end early...just try to be cool and patient. If you keep asking him about it and making him feel guilty about it, you can affect his performance.
2007-03-18 12:17:40 · answer #1 · answered by FormerGiGi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, all I can say babe is that I hope it was well worth it because the first one's are alway's the most memorable (until you have your second ; ) sex is a social thing that people do for fun so don't take it too serious all the time. Bear in mind, that not every man will be "two pump's and a squirt". And yes, secondly, when they are worried someone will bust you (usually your parent's) then it will be over quickly because the more you think of being caught it actually mean's the more fun it is (and being caught is fun!), it usually outweigh's being worried at the time because when you have achieved "getting away with it", it actually is just as much fun as what the sex was itself! Secondly, if you did not find it fullfilling (he he!), look at it on the positive side of thing's, he must of thought you were very sexy to of only lasted a couple of second's! Better luck next time, not all lad's are the same, me personally, i'm like an ever ready battery and i can go for mile's! Just think of two rabbit's, that's me and my bird! If your interested and need to be educated in a more thorough way then contact me on shainesmith@yahoo.co.uk she won't ever know! Like I say i'm full of energy!
2007-03-19 04:13:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
30 minutes to an hour?!? Did he mean to actual sex or the foreplay included?
Actual sex usually lasts between 10-15 minutes at most. It lasts a bit longer when the guy takes care of the lady's needs too. Real gentlemen care about those things.
But, to answer your question, things can be sped up out of fear or time presses.
2007-03-18 12:17:12 · answer #3 · answered by thezaylady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex can last for hours or it can last for minutes. It depends on the guy. Typically with guys who haven't much sex experience they aren't very good at it - and it finishes quicker then they want it to. Just because sex is quick doesn't mean it's that bad, but it sounds like the guy needs a bit more practice at it. Not all guys are quick in bed so don't worry too much.
2007-03-18 12:07:07 · answer #4 · answered by jimi h-b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm assuming you're fairly young. I lost my virginity when I was 21. The guy, who is now my ex, was the same way. LOL...you got it better than me though because yours was good. It's pretty bad when you have it for the first time and you know it's suppose to be better.
The night I lost mine, I already did what older women mastered....fake an orgasm AND think to myself "Are you finished yet?". He finished fast and never took his time even though I asked him to numerous times. I was disappointed as well as you might be feeling but you know what? After my ex, I waited almost 3 years to have sex again and when I did, which was 5 months ago, the wait was worth it. The guy I've been with for about 9 months finally took the time to go slow (it lasted a little over 30 minutes) but thats because we are taking out relationship slow. Everyone gets their hits and misses, sweety. Sex is good but you have to balance your thinking out to make sure it's worth it and communicate with your guy, and any other guy you DECIDE to sleep with, about what you want. This is a lesson so from now base your decisions on what you learned from this one.
2007-03-18 13:27:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not. Maybe he is just a quick finisher, or maybe he really was worried that someone would walk in. either way it won't always be like that. If a guy has something to fear, he may finish fast, but he should have made sure you wee good first.
2007-03-18 12:05:00 · answer #6 · answered by engineer46526 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sex doesnt always last long. >_<
it won't always be like this, just as long as you're not always doing it at the same place (at home with nobody around) and with the same person (because other people might go on longer). I'm not sure if it's normal for a guy to finish in fear, but i hope you didn't regret losing your virginity to him.
2007-03-18 12:04:05 · answer #7 · answered by somethingsovague 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm guessing by the fact that you mentioned that no one was home and that someone might walk in on you that this was not your house... Tell me then, you did prepare for this childs college education and you're retired already to allow you the time to raise it, right? And I'm to understand that this was the first time you've had sex with your husband? Perhaps you should put off breeding until you're more prepared for the possible consequences. Worry more about having the public support this b-astard child or that you may have to kill it and not so much about how long Prince charming can perform...
2007-03-18 12:17:25 · answer #8 · answered by annoyed_with_the_other_answers 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am sorry you got stuck with a minute wonder man for your first time. No it is not always like that, but it might be until you are older and sleep with older people with more experience. That said, a PAP SMEAR is absoulutely vital after becoming sexually active, as is a reliable form of birth control to back up the condom you guys used...you did use a condom, right??? call your ob/gyn or if you have to keep it hush hush go to your local Planned Parenthood for check up and free birth control.
2007-03-18 12:06:18 · answer #9 · answered by Stormy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Slow everything down. Be discreet. Use protection. Pregnancy is your worst enemy while you're still in school. And BTW, guys don't finish early because of fear, but in this case he may not know why, and felt he needed to give an answer.
2007-03-18 12:10:46 · answer #10 · answered by bullwinkle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋