I am in a group of 6 friends We've been best friends for about 5 years. This year, one of them started treating me differently. Lets say her name is Amber. well, Amber started treating me like dirt. she makes everything i do a big deal and she always gets mad at me. after she's brutal to me, i admit i've said some pretty mean things back, but after i do, i ALWAYS apologize for what i said. but she can never forgive me. she did once and we were good for a couple months and now she's treating me like crap again. and now its not just me this time, its all of us but one. and i would just forget about her, but one of the people in our group of friends is her twin sister, "Allie". If I ever wanted to go over Allie's house, it would be Amber's too. she's ruining my friendship with not only Allie, but all of us because shes getting people in the middle of it. i just want to be a normal group of friends that love each other like sisters, but shes tearing us apart with her attitude! help!
2007-03-18 10:35:14 · 9 answers · asked by !mickdee 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
That's awful! With a friend like Amber, who needs enemies? You say that she's treating everyone in the group like crap. Is she treating her sister badly, too? She sounds like she feels left out and, instead of trying to be more involved in the group, wants to tear the group apart. What all of you went to her at the same time and each expressed her concern for Amber and tried to talk it through. I don't know why Amber would be friends with a group one day and then start treating them badly unless something bad happened, not even necessarily in the group. If she's doing bad in school or with guys, or her parents are pressuring her to be more like Allie, she could be reacting with anger.
Whatever happens, it will be easier if the rest of you stick together. It would be ideal if you could all help Amber through her troubles, but if you can't, you can still help each other without her. I hope everything turns out allright for you.
2007-03-18 10:46:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to confront her about the way shes acting one on one. Don't accuse her or point fingers because then she'll just be defensive. Tell her that youve noticed a change in attitude from her over the past year n you want to know whats up. Shell probally deny the way she is acting at first and get defensive but make sure you tell her that your not trying to attack her. Make sure you telll her that her friendship is important to you and you don't want to lose her as a friend. Tell her exactly what you wrote in this question. If she doesn't budge and admits no change in attitude let her know that you don't need a friend who makes you feel like crap and that you just wanted to see if you did somting wrong.
If the confrontation doesnt work you really need to think about if she's really worth being a friend of yours. The next big decision is going to be from Allie. Does she know how her sister is acting? Even though she wont want to betray her sister, if she knows her sister is wrong she'll probally stick with you and your friends. If Allie is a true friend of yours it wont matter that you and Amber aren't getting along.
2007-03-18 17:50:56 · answer #2 · answered by smile. its theresaa =] 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
basically what i think you should do is tell her what a biatch shes being and how shes breaking up the friendship youve all cherished for so long. tell her that you wish things could be the way they were when you ALL got a long fantastically. Ask her if theres anything specific that made her start acting this way to you. maybe you didnt realize it but you did something to hurt her feelings and shes just holding a grudge. tell her your sorry for whatever might have happened between you but that you miss her friendship. if you think it will help have the friends around to back you up; if they see the way she treats you and agrees that its wrong. or at least "allie" maybe she can talk the most sence into her. theyre twins; they sometimes have a way with each other. if youre too afraid of a face to face confontation; tell "allie" how you feel (and everything else ^ there i said) and ask her to talk to her for you.
2007-03-18 17:53:50 · answer #3 · answered by the_syco_t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay friends with the other 4 girls, and be friends with Allie, and dump Amber no one should be treated like that.
2007-03-18 17:48:01 · answer #4 · answered by love to help 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK calm down Ive been in the same sitch so i invited everybody to my house even the crapy person and i no what ur thinking y would she come say on the invite so fun and important then wen ur there say everybody were going to play a game get some chairs and tell everybody to tell what they think bout each other then everybody tell a secret and tell the truth(if ur not to old) and if this don't work out get some more advice i tried my best....oh and this worked for me
2007-03-18 17:51:08 · answer #5 · answered by haley elizabeth yo ;) 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should just be friends with the other 4 girls and tell Amber that you do not like what she is doing and you do not want to be her friend any more.
2007-03-18 17:40:25 · answer #6 · answered by Heidi T 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to ask her about it. try to work things out and tell her that its going to break the group apart if she acts like this and say your sorry and dont want to hurt her at all if shes a good friend she should understamd and try to fix the problem
2007-03-18 17:43:37 · answer #7 · answered by Linda S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would also say confront her about it. There is something going on that she's not letting you on to. It's very possible that she is just jealous of the way your life is going and isn't sure how to be happy for you. Maybe ask her to go to lunch with you, just the two of you. That way there will be no distractions. Good luck!!!
2007-03-18 17:58:51 · answer #8 · answered by Mindy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont talk to her or tell her that your tired of her being mean and say that its destroying your friendship
2007-03-18 17:43:06 · answer #9 · answered by ??? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋