Why is it when a husband or wife is unfaithful people try to say that it's their spouse's fault? That they drove them to cheat b/c they didn't do this or they did this or that, etc? I don't believe it's the spouses fault at all. I think that if a person cheats then there is nobody to blame but themselves. That it is like a character flaw in them. I think that they should be man or woman enough to tell their spouse that they don't love them anymore or that they want somebody else...whichever the case may be and not be a coward and sneak around. So why is it that the spouse gets blamed for a cheater's actions sometimes?
2007-03-18 06:08:56 · 24 answers · asked by love my life 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
exactly they are just trying to put the finger on someone else.
2007-03-18 06:11:44 · answer #1 · answered by PD 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Because its easier to blame the other person than to admit there own faults . besides they need to justify why they cheated in the first place . after all when the spouse find's out and asks why did you do this to me ,what are they going to say because i don't love you anymore and i wanted to ? i agree with you it's not right they should come clean and get a divorce before cheating . but that's why they blame the other .
Joe B your answers are never boring to read ..lol you crack me up with your responces ..lol
2007-03-18 13:14:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have been on both ends of this, and it is always the person who does the strayings fault. They can claim that there was a problem with the relationship, or that there was a void that needed to be filled or that they made a stupid mistake. While they can regret their action later and know for themselves that they never want to repeat that mistake. They still made the choice to do it, and it is nobody's fault but their own.
2007-03-18 13:20:51 · answer #3 · answered by Ammikins 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You're right--it is NOT the innocent spouse's fault.
But cheaters don't LIKE to feel guilty, even though they are....so blaming the spouse makes them feel less guilty.
I HATE cheaters, and I think the wronged spouse should get a huge chunk of money, because the cheater VIOLATED the marriage contract!
Well that, or shoot them!
2007-03-18 13:13:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
It' happens because alot of married people do not understand the true meaning of commitment. They seem to be under the illusion that marriage is easy marriage sometime can be alot of work . Also there is a lack of communication and understanding. Besides if they get caught there is no real consequence except divorce not truly realizing they will pay for it in the end.
2007-03-18 13:26:36 · answer #5 · answered by miester44 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you a hundred percent. Anyone who says its the spouses fault as an answer is just not willing to change there life around, they would rather feel sorrow for themselves that way, doesn't make sense to me at all. People r cowards sometimes.
2007-03-18 13:14:14 · answer #6 · answered by leslieknows 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Basically, the only one blaming the one who was cheated on is the cheater.
The cheater is probably in denial, and wants to believe that they were not doing the wrong thing, and that they have perfectly good reasons for doing what they did. It makes them feel better about themselves.
2007-03-18 13:13:56 · answer #7 · answered by NEONhearts 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I agree completely. I think this happens because the person that cheats feels like they are justifying what they have done.Many times a person cheats and the first thing they do is blame the other person.No one made them drop their pants or lay down.People who cheat often say they made a mistake.It's never a mistake whenever you intentionally have sex with someone.
2007-03-18 13:20:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
You have a good point, I think you will hit a lot of nerve here because that's exactly what's been going on with couples that having a problem. For a men that committed adultery,their excuse is,their wives push them on that direction, they don't want to feel guilty for what they did,like ruining someones life,like their kids and wife. But the reality of it is god says that "who he committed adultery is not love but lust" For men that defies their lust comes from their heart not from outside influences.
So this is what most men have from their heart, not because they were push to go to that direction. they call it "girl watching"
for women,their account is from being lonely, feeling empty,and this are some of the coast that put them on that direction,but over all committing adultery is a sin...
2007-03-18 13:39:54 · answer #9 · answered by islandgirl06 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a way to deflect the flaw in their own character. If they can somehow make their spouse believe they are to blame it makes them less imperfect in their own eyes.
2007-03-18 13:15:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Nobody takes responsibility for their own action! Society today like to blame everyone else for their problems! It is really sad!
2007-03-18 13:12:55 · answer #11 · answered by Hot Momma 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋