I'm married with three children(9-12-20)year olds.Together for 25,seperated twice before(Not legally),Asked by her twice to return.Again after a year & half I'm being told she has another man and wants us to be friends,she says to stay but find some one also.I'm 45,shes 38,14 when we met.Her reasons are she changed,grew-up,out grown me-don't love me anymore.My reponse to her is a divorce this time around.What should I do ? If I move out now,can she use it against me ;Grounds:Abandonment in the future?
2007-03-18 05:26:24 · 9 answers · asked by Ira D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Everyone seems to automatically assume that the male should leave. Why? It seems to me that she is the fundamental problem. Therefore get an attorney and present her with documentation that requires her to leave. Keep the kids until the dissolution order is final
2007-03-18 06:05:48 · answer #1 · answered by Curmudgeon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got it. Do NOT leave the residence. Abandonment is a possibility if you do. You don't want that. My advice to you is to get a female lawyer and yes, you do need a lawyer since you have kids. It's understandable since you married her so young that she grew out of love with you, sorry about that, but you had to know that was a possibility. She's the one that has the new man, so she's going to look like the "bad" person here, if there is one "bad" person. So, stay in the house, contact a woman lawyer and get the process started. Good luck to you. Oh, yes and DO NOT find someone else to date during the divorce process.
2007-03-18 05:45:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you and she need to consult an attorney. And use a mediating attorney. Look in the yellow pages for attorney - divorce - mediating. The only way to divorce is civilly. If you two get into an adversarial stance where you each hire one, you'll each end up paing 6 grand each..... and they will drag it out for as long as they can. (there ain't no such thing as a poor attorney.....) Before you see a mediating attorney, agree between you who should get what... the less the guy has to write, the less it costs. You can get some papers off the internet to see what they look like. Be sure you each re-do your wills!!!!!! Be sure!!!
The usual fee is $75-300. He fills out the forms, you each sign , he files, and you are out of it. Do not leave the house. You are correct... if you do, it is regarded as abandonment, at least until you get your papers filed.
2007-03-18 06:16:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahaha, that sounds sturdy. Too, undesirable there is not any such issue. until eventually per chance you both comply with make up some thing like a pre-nup, that states if both of you do some thing intentional that could nicely be grounds for a divorce, the different get at the same time that does that action is keen to provide up each thing and PAY the different get at the same time x volume of greenbacks. Then take it to a criminal specialist/ notary for signatures.
2016-12-02 04:29:13 · answer #4 · answered by cruickshank 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is time to get out, and get the divorce. The only way she could get you on abandonment is if you stop all contact with the underage children for 6 months or more. It is time for you to be happy and think of yourself for a change, and include your children in the change as well, you can be more than a weekend father, like most.
2007-03-18 05:33:15 · answer #5 · answered by twyla 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regardless of whether you are going to be blamed for the grounds of your marriage ending or not, your marriage is apparently over in her eyes and your own. Why would you want to stay with a woman that no longer wants you? I had a good friend that tried staying in the same house with his wife during their separation and it caused more arguments. If you can't stay married then one of you needs to live somewhere else. It will provide the kids with a more peaceful environment. Good Luck.
2007-03-18 05:35:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
time for a divorce, talk to a family lawyer on what action you should take
if you move out, who is going to pay the bills for the house where your kids are? you plus then paying for your own place as well, Also if you have a note make sure it gets paid if you fall behind it will ruin your credit
2007-03-18 05:38:29 · answer #7 · answered by goz1111 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would call a lawyer but id go ahead and move out you will still get visiting rights so id file for a divorce you'll find some one who'll stand by you threw everything except cheating of course
2007-03-18 05:41:16 · answer #8 · answered by sweetgranny06 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you move she can use it against you . hold off moving until your told to by the judge I would go for the kids tell the judge how fickle she is not stable for the kids at all
2007-03-18 05:45:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋