My wife wants to work as a personal trainer. Should I feel threatened?

Question

My wife wants to be a certified personal trainer. I don't like the idea of my wife being around any sweaty men. And as up close and personal trainers have to be it is driving me up the wall. She has always said that she wanted to stay at home and be there for the kids when they got out of school and now she wants to leave our home b/c she feels like she needs an income. I told her I support her in whatever she wants to do but that I wish she would not do it b/c she feels like she has to have plan b.

I love my wife and when I look at her and am next to her I get weak in the knees and want her.

I don't want some other man to get that close to her. I told her I don't mind her helping women or older people but I don't want her feeling some other man's muscles. She can feel mine and be my trainer. Yes I admit, I'm jealous and she has told me I've got nothing to worry about. But I can't help it. It makes me insane thinking about her touching another man alot.
Am I being controlling?

Answer 1

yes you are being selfish.its not all about what you want all the time. she is your wife your soul mate and the mother of your kids. she has needs also. maybe she wants to get away for a few hours at a time and help you make a better life for the family. and she obviously needs something else in her life to feel complete. you know they say when someone is jealous like you are that they are the one thats not trustworthy. so think about it hard do you want your wife to be happy? and it seems like she loves you very much because she is still there with you. be careful not to smother her and be so controling and get rid of that jealousy because it can kill a marriage fast. good luck

Answer 2

So, you have a sprained, strained, inflamed muscle with swelling. You don't need major medical expenses for this. Take your anti-inflammitories, rest the muscle, do hot and cold compresses until the swelling goes down , then GRADUALLY get back into working out. The personal trainer was wrong wrong wrong, but you had a choice to stop if you felt she was working you beyond your capacity. It does not seem a reasonable reason to sue. Even a REAL physical therapist can goof. It's your body, and you are the final arbitrator of what you can or should do. Never surrender your own knowledge of your body to someone else. Since the people at your wife's current gym seem incompetant, suggest to your wife she would be better off at another gym.

Answer 3

Think about it, a guy that gets trained by a woman is probably a really skinny guy or fat guy that's why they need a trainer. But a really buff guy would never want a woman training him, most i would say because they don't need a trainer. Most woman train woman more also. The guy's you gotta worry about are the employees. But even then you always know where she's at and you can come work out every now and then. Don't show weakness to your woman or she will cheat on you be a man. But you never know if a woman's cheating so if you see her being overly flirty then dump her

Answer 4

Your insecurity isn't appealing and be careful it doesn't become a total turnoff to her. Also, it's apparent there's a lack of trust there, which doesn't flatter her either.

Perhaps you need to speak to a counselor if you can't get your emotions under control yourself. Jealousy and insecurity have ruined many a relationship, as well as lack of trust. Trust is part of any relationship foundation and if it's missing, the relationship will begin to crumble.

The idea that she will be around other men, but still come home to you should be flattering. Out of all the options out there, YOU are the one she wants to be with. Try to act appreciative of that (since you apparently dig her so much) and not like someone who wants to keep her on a leash and only speak to and touch those he deems inferior enough to not feel threatened by.

Answer 5

Your wife just wants to be able to help out. There isn't a lot of contact involved on the clients part and if they do she has an obligation to report them, and the only touching she will do is to help the client with support or showing them how to do an exercise properly.
Its great you still fancy your wife like mad and can actually get jealous but dont let it ruin your relationship.

Answer 6

Can you say inferiority complex as well as auto-insecurity deficiency.
My wife is a psychiatric nurse and deals with sometimes extremely deficient people. She comes home at least once a week to inform me that another one of them pinched her bottom or attempted to touch her in other innappropriate ways.
i have come to look at this as typical behavior for mentally challenged patients, and because i trust my wife implicitly i have no fear or jealousy. After all, she chooses to return to me every night and we are the best of friends. If she ever did come to me and say she wanted to leave, although it would cause me some pain for a while i would respect her and if she were meant to come back she would.

Answer 7

No, you shouldn't feel threatened.
Sweaty men aren't always as attractive as Hollywood would like us to think. And if she's a personal trainer, chances are she won't be feeling any muscles, she'll be helping people who need to get into shape for their health... and remember, women need personal trainers too. She might be training women... did you think of that?
Child-rearing and house keeping isn't a picnic, it's usually a thankless job. I think she owes it to herself to have something else to add to her list of things to be proud of, and you should be proud that she has the ambition to want to make a difference in other people's lives.
It's up to you to decide.... are you going to let the green-eyed monster ruin your marriage?

Answer 8

I don't think you're controlling...I think you're insecure. Has you're wife ever-cheated on you..NO?, then you need to work on your insecurity issue. Look, I can understand you not wanting her around fellas, but unless she's given you a reason to believe she's cheated on you then you need to be a good husband and be there for her 100% both how you feel inside and what encouragement you give her. If you feel you can't handle it I suggest that you go talk to a professional therapist or priest and try to work through things. She needs your support!

Answer 9

yes you are being insane and controlling.. Why she has a gift which she is open enough to share and if you think it didnt make her question think again realize she is at work just like you throwin wrenches or whatever you do its work and something that gives her confidence something most humans would appreciate what the hek is wrong with you? Pysche the world understands try understanding the world ....good luck:)

Answer 10

there is no room for jealousy in a relationship... jealousy is very destructive.

if you and your wife love and respect each other, there should be no problem....

certified personal trainers make a good wage and provide useful service... and it doesn't matter what type of job a person has, they are going to be involved with all types of people, men and women alike...

could be worse, she could be swinging from a pole naked in some strip club?