Can one LEARN to be charasmatic?

Question

My question was inspired by another I just read and responded to. What I want to know is if you can LEARN to be charasmatic or is it a quality that you just naturally possess? If you feel that it can be learned, can you give me some suggestions on how one can be more charasmatic? Thanks a lot!

Answer 1

I think a person's personality traits allow them to be charismatic. For example, some people don't even have to try that hard to make friends and then there are others that have a hard time making friends. If you have charismatic tendencies they are honed through life experience, intelligence and a desire to be genuine.

Answer 2

CHARISMA is a personality trait that helps you influence other's feelings. It enables you to:
- Encourage others to do their best
- Persuade someone to make a commitment
- Show a high level of energy when doing things important to you
- Facilitate a discussion in a group
- Brainstorm new ideas with other people
- Express your values and beliefs
- Describe your vision with passion and charisma
- Speak with motivation or inspiration
- Use facial expressions and gestures to convey your heart-felt emotions
- Talk about your ideals with flair and conviction

The dictionary describes CHARISMA as "personal magnetism or charm" and the quality—especially in leaders—"to arouse fervent popular devotion and enthusiasm." Through CHARISMA, you use dramatic expressiveness to share your wisdom and declare your beliefs, values and ideals. You tell people what's possible. Your message touches their hearts as well as their minds.

We all use CHARISMA, especially when we want to influence people. You let them know how you feel with your words and your whole being. When you talk, your arms and hands move. Your tone of voice and facial expressions convey honest emotion, and people respond to you with similar emotions. Your lyrics are accompanied by music, so to speak. You're engaging and entertaining. Your enthusiasm is contagious. People identify with your commitment, and they feel inspired to go along.

Can you LEARN to be charismatic. I believe you can learn to be more so...but to establish this behavior pattern, to make this kind of change to the way you think and act, make it natural, you have to do a lot of stretching at first. Things like expressing with your voice, hands and face...how you really feel about something. It may seem awkward at first, but the more you do it, the more natural it will seem. And follow up with repeating the behavior for a long time. Like exercising a muscle until the neural pathways are established.

Not easy, because it's not your way. But possible. You may not every be a Martin Luther King or Barbra Streisand, but you can build on the charisma you already have.

Answer 3

Yes I believe so. Some might have the benefit of learning it early on from their parents but for others who are willing and disciplined and humble enough I believe we can take concrete steps to build charisma.

(Let me digress first:) One leader I consider to be very charismatic is Pope John Paul 2. It was said of him once that it did not matter who you were, JP2 can deal with you on a human level because he can recognize "where you are in your journey in life." And we can say the same of any great charismatic leader we can think of. They know exactly what to say and how to say it because they know their audience well and they bring themselves to the level of the audience.

(Dragging the discussion back to Earth:) In order to do this I believe the first thing we have to learn is the ability to listen; JUST LISTEN. If you haven't tried it yet, learn it. It is a skill that has been taken for granted. Try JUST LISTENING to anyone. No interruptions, (not even in your mind.) No side comments. No rushing. Suspend judgment for a while. Just listen.

Do you wonder why some parents/teachers are more approachable/respected/listened to and thus more charismatic than others? It is because they know how to just listen. Talking to them they make you feel that your problem is unique, but the reality is they've been through that too! They just don't tell you outright, they give you a chance to figure it out yourself. They suspend judgment, they know how to just listen. So consequently you are more drawn to them and isn't charisma just that force that draws us to certain people?

If you can do this simple thing I believe you are well on your way to becoming just a little bit more charismatic. Good luck!