I love a girl. She's the greatest person in the entire world and I feel so comfortable and free with her.
I could imagine living a lifetime with her, just holding her hand and talking about anything.
I want to marry her and I want to be the father of her child.
One problem.
I'm gay.
It's horrible - I feel terrible! Every time I get near her and want to hold and kiss her, my homosexuality gets in the way and I push back.
I'm completely lost and I have no idea what I can do. Don't get me wrong, I sincerely love her in every heterosexual way -
But I can't find myself to be physically attracted to her and I HATE it!
Please, if anyone has any answers at all, reply.
2007-03-16 19:09:25 · 12 answers · asked by elias51991 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I'm amazed at how fast people have replied
Ok, to answer some questions:
1: She knows that I'm gay.
2: She also really, really loves me.
And also - I've known her my entire life. Ever since I was baptized 2 months after I was born.
2007-03-16 19:26:13 · update #1
Oh and Alicia is bi-sexual.
2007-03-16 19:37:11 · update #2
You may not be gay, but bi-sexual. I'm guessing you do feel something physical for her from your words. Too often, I've seen people label themselves too narrowly long before they know themselves.
2007-03-16 19:16:26 · answer #1 · answered by Pint 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Don't hate the fact that you love your friend so dearly. But think of what it might mean for her. If you marry her, and are not having a satisfactory physical relationship... will she be able to cope with that? When you know what the limitations are, it becomes easier to accept what may not be possible. Respect her feelings, and be the good friends that you are. If you know for sure that you are gay, look for love with another man, because at the end of the day when you get home, you will only be truly happy with another man.
Also imagine a scenario where you did get married to your friend. In very crude terms, to satisfy the gay side of you, would you still go out with other men? Will that not amount to cheating on her? What purpose will this marriage solve except the emotional support that you already have from her as friends?
Please be true to yourself, and have realistic expectations in life. Many times we wish things were the way we wanted them to, but it isn't always so. We have to let go sometimes, and this constant search for true happiness always goes on. Don't lose heart over the matter, just be clear on what will be right for the both of you.
2007-03-16 21:41:36 · answer #2 · answered by Gaymes Last Orchestra 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Does she feel the same way?
Does she know you are gay?
Sounds like you care a lot about her, and thats a nice feeling to have. Do you sincerely see yourself being openly gay and in a relationship with this girl? Is that fair to her or you?
I don't have any real solutions for you. But I do hope the best for you both.
2007-03-16 19:20:23 · answer #3 · answered by Active Denial System™ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Are you telling that you have the green light to throw her down on the bed, rip open her top and suck her beautiful ****? Let me tell you, if I could get an attractive girl to do this for me, I would be straight. I am the worst type of queer, I fully know i am attracted to women, but i am with men because men actally put out.
2007-03-16 21:05:56 · answer #4 · answered by nooner 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She sounds like a phenomenal friend - more than worthy of a good long heart to heart.
You've got to let her know how you feel, what you expect from the relationship & what you're afraid you cannot provide...
You're not alone - She's with you & she'll understand.
2007-03-16 19:19:11 · answer #5 · answered by Charlie 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like your homosexuality is not "getting in the way"... it's reminding you who you really are. And you shouldn't feel terrible about it nor hate it. Being gay is a part of who you are, and you should embrace that. Enjoy her friendship, but understand you are created for men-
Best wishes
2007-03-16 19:17:36 · answer #6 · answered by gatherusin 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
as a bi sexual woman, i feel safe in saying the ohers are right. are you strictly dickly or are you not sure yet? maybe you love her on another level and it isn't physical. but NEVER force yourself into a mold that you don't fit. then again maybe you ARE bi, and haven't figured it out yet. take time to get to know your feelings before you hurt hers...
2007-03-16 19:29:34 · answer #7 · answered by afreeca812 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Have have been gay most of my life...A first I thought it would past...it didn't But guess what...I'm happy!!
I came to accept my self ...and love me for who I am
Try it...you might like that person in the mirror.
2007-03-16 20:15:40 · answer #8 · answered by John 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow!!... I feel bad for you... really.. I do.... I don't know what to say... How about accepting that you are gay?... I don't think you will ever be able to have that type of relationship with her...
2007-03-16 19:18:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I'd ask this chick if she has a brother if I were you. Otherwise, I'd make her go to the gym, buff her up, and make her act like a man around the house. I'd make her carry me, hold the door for me, and grow a nice long thick ....well u know... with my magic potion
2007-03-16 21:35:51 · answer #10 · answered by Gay R 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋