I am really considering leaving my husband & I'm scared. I don't want to end up alone & not be able to find another man to love or to love me. I will be 26 soon & I have 1 child. I'm afraid that there won't be too many men wanting to date a divorced mother. I love my son more than anything & him & I are my main focus right now, I'm just talking about sometime down the road when I may feel like dating again, what if there is no one?
2007-03-16 16:58:29 · 30 answers · asked by love my life 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When I left my first husband I had two sons and the last thing I thought about was a relationship with another man. If anything, it was exciting getting my own place with my kids and not have to worry about his mental problems anymore. I dated someone casually about a year later but it wasn't until I wasn't looking that I found the perfect man for me through a mutual friend. We have been together almost 4 years and have a son together. He had two sons before too. So now we are like the new age Brady Bunch with five boys (two his two mine and one ours). You never know what is going to happen, you just have to make sure that this is the step you want to take. Do not worry about finding another man, just focus on your son because he should be your world.
2007-03-17 06:31:00 · answer #1 · answered by Tink 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll soon be in your same situation--I'm 27 with 1 daughter to raise (the other's an angel in Heaven -stillborn). My husband and I had 4 years together but sometimes men aren't really family-minded at this age. You have to think about why you are considering leaving--if it's not a good situation for you and your child to grow up with that as an example of a healthy relationship, then you will be doing the right thing. Church groups and other divorced dads are out there looking for blended families. There will be someone for you if don't go hunting for just anyone--be selective and cautious. Afterall, you want a good role model for your son, right?
On the other hand, if the situation has potential to be rectified, perhaps a separation and/or marriage & family counseling could help.
2007-03-17 00:06:16 · answer #2 · answered by nancydeanna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had three kids when I divorced at age 31. I found plenty of good men. Using some online personals and plenty of common sense and being open and honest I also made some friends (dated a few duds too)
I met my current husband four years ago. He loves my children (probably more than their mostly-absent biological father does) and we have one on the way. Believe me, if you're only 26 you're hardly out of the running for another love. I am not at all conventionally attractive but did my best to keep myself true and at my best form. Believe me, the old myth that men aren't interested in a woman with kids is ridiculous.
I suggest looking for men who are also divorced and have kids.
2007-03-17 00:23:07 · answer #3 · answered by Cassandra G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop worrrying about a man altogether. Woman where is your independence. If all you are worried about is not finding a man then you are fine!!!! You shouldn't be with someone just because you are scared to be alone. You have a son so you are never alone! Live for the right reasons. You aren't happy leave your husband, but be sure you have done everything to make it work!!!
2007-03-17 00:22:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very personal thing that you'll have to weight out. I'm sorry that your in a position to even have to feel this way. What I do have to tell you is that I was in a nine year relationship that was WAY unhealthy... I was NOT going to give up... you can't do it alone. Four years later, at 31, I'm am engaged to the most wonderful man. You should know what your worth is... I know you have a child... you are the example. Allow you and your child, and husband to know happiness. Together... or apart. I wish you well. Be Love.
2007-03-17 00:09:04 · answer #5 · answered by ********** 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I left my husband when I was 24 and my daughter was 3. It was scary at first, but it was so wonderful to be out from under that marriage.
About 6 months later, I started casually dating and then found someone that fit perfectly in our lives. I think if you give you and your son some time to find the 'real' you when you are away from your marriage, you will come to like what you see. When you know yourself well, finding a good match for yourself is much easier.
2007-03-17 00:05:12 · answer #6 · answered by lxl_serendipity_lxl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was in those same shoes and I can tell you if your not happy then take the chance because I did and I found someone even better. It's hard to get yourself up to doing it but think of having a happy and better life that awaits you out there in the real world and you also can get money from your husband that he has to pay you until your divorced and if you take you child with you he'll have to help there also.
Oh and one thing keep your head up high and don't let him bring you back down just keep telling yourself I can do it .
2007-03-17 00:15:35 · answer #7 · answered by JG78 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dont be scared. Of course you will find someone when the time is right.
My mom left her husband when she was in her 50's. She was terrified. But i will tell you what i told her, there is no point in staying in a marriage if its not working. Not for the children or yourself. It can only get better, but you have to leave him first.
My mom gets hit on all the time (okay that was kinda creepy to say) so dont be afraid.
just do whats best for you and you child.
good luck :)
2007-03-17 00:04:17 · answer #8 · answered by jinxed_pixie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am very scared. I too am in the process. I am 32, FIVE kids but you know what, Ive had a tough life and I can tell you a person CAN be better off alone. No one to answer to, you go where you want and with whom you want. It took me 14 years to realize this! Good luck :)
2007-03-17 01:45:32 · answer #9 · answered by Blue 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, you have to put yourself first. If the only reason you are staying in your marriage is that you are afraid of being alone, you should leave, and you need to spend some time focusing on you. It is a scary thing to be completely by yourself, but if you aren't ok with being single, then no matter who you're in a relationship with, you'll always be clingy and dependent, and that's not healthy. Good luck.
2007-03-17 00:03:10 · answer #10 · answered by sarai_kristi 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋