My married boss just told me that he is head over heels in love with me but feels trapped because his wife said that if he ever left her she would take their baby and he will never see him again. I don't understand why because she does not take care of the kid at all. She is very lazy and believes she does not have to do anything around the house or to the baby. He told me that if he doesnt tell the baby to kiss mommy he does not do so at all! The kid is SUPER CUTE!! He wants to build something with me but he does not want to lose his baby and I completely understand. I tried to break up things with him MANY time and he gets very upset and tells me that if everytime things get tough I'm going to run this is not going to work. I don't want to be involved in all this mess and I don't want him to lose his baby but does anyone know any legal advice on how he can gain custody of the baby. The laws always favor the mothers.
2007-03-16 15:57:00 · 14 answers · asked by kr1stal9 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you probably should find a single man........he is probably lying to you about his wife being lazy, cheating men always say stuff like that.
2007-03-16 16:00:36 · answer #1 · answered by ladybug 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The guy is a cheat that is what is wrong with him. You need to end it, and show some strength. As long as he can keep you coming back, he will do it. The world is full of women who have been told the same stories you have been told. They would all leave these "controlling, abusive, frigid, angry, spoiled, selfish" women if not for the kids or because they think she will cause him some harm. It is like they just fill in the blanks with whatever garbage they want to sell, and some very sweet woman buys it. Get yourself out of this picture. If the man needs to end his marriage, he needs to do it without you. He obviously isn't going to do it with you involved. He will not leave her. He is your boss, and you are asking how he can gain custody of his child. If he could do it, he would. He cannot because there is no issue. He probably doesn't even want to leave his wife.
You don't know what is going on in the marriage unless you are in the marriage. Get out so you can find happiness independent of this guy.
Also...men are gaining a lot more rights to their children in divorces than ever before. I don't know if the same thing qualifies for a man who is an adulterer though.
2007-03-16 16:09:32 · answer #2 · answered by kalea_kane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boss has the wool pulled over your eyes. If she left he would get visitation and you know that for a fact. There is no state I know of that refuses visitation unless molestation by the father is involved. You are also being told one side of the story. Have you sat down in his house to witness how this mother acts or is this story you're telling just coming from his mouth. He is keeping his family on one side to have his home life and you on the other side as a mistress. a married man that cheats on his wife is #1 - a liar and #2 - unfaithful just by their actions. You automatically trust this man because he says he loves you. Guess what - he said that to his wife too and probably here lately. Don't let someone make a fool out of you. He isn't going to get a divorce and if by chance wifey divorces him after finding out the truth do you want someone that will get tired of you someday and do the same thing to you? Look at a man's character before jumping into bed with them unless you want to become his next victim.
2007-03-16 16:11:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
How old are you 16? Do you really want a man who has a history and a child with his WIFE and is cheating on her? Where are your values sweetheart? Any respectable man wouldn't WANT to involve someone in his DRAMA; especially someone he claims to be "head over heels in love with". It's BS and you're falling for it. If he really loved you he would wait until he got his personal issues worked out to pursue anything. You're a rebound and the other ball is still on the court.
Respect yourself enough to find someone who is available, and don't talk about someone who you don't know. There is ALWAYS 2 sides of a story - maybe he's a terrible husband to her? YOU DON"T KNOW cause YOU aren;t THERE in their house.
Watch a Lifetime movie sometime...you can't trust men that cheat. PERIOD.
2007-03-16 16:07:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to what everyone is telling you. Of course he is going to tell you all the bad things about his WIFE, if they are even true this is.
It is still not a reason to go and cheat on his wife. If it was that bad, he would divorce her.
What he's going thru is nothing any other married couple doesn't go thru.
Have some respect for yourself and leave this man. He cannot fire you for dumping him, but I would be looking for another job and when I found one, I'd resign. Don't let him intimidate you.
Would you really want to marry a man who cheated on his wife with you? Would you really believe he wouldn't do it to you?
I don't know your age, but I am thinking he is older than you. Shame on him. He's a scumbag.
2007-03-16 16:14:15 · answer #5 · answered by myoctoberblues 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This man is very bad for you. In a few years, when you've broken away from this scum bag you'll see how damaging it was for your self esteem to be around him. You cannot trust a man like this. Of course he's going to say terrible things abour his wife. How else would he justify cheating on her, or convince you to be his accomplice? If he wanted to leave his wife, he would. I don't think that he will never leave her for you. You should break all your ties with him. You deserve better than this.
2007-03-16 16:04:19 · answer #6 · answered by fuzzyblue 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First make sure he's being honest because most men in that situation will lie there butts off. Second tell him to visit a local divorce lawyer who will be better able to advise him of your state laws and the local judges that might rule in his favor!
2007-03-16 16:06:04 · answer #7 · answered by mcnppo1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
File a sexual harrassment charge seeing he threatened your job.Also before you go assuming his wife is evil and all, try hearing HER side of it.Maybe,just maybe she is evil,but he isnt an angel himself girlie.If he will cheat on the woman he loved ,married and made a baby with, then what makes you think youre any better to him once he has had you for a while?Think about it.
2007-03-16 16:26:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is full of it if he believes she can take his child and he not ever see him again.
Thats bull.
She cant deny him his child. He may only get visitation, but she cant take the baby and not allow him to see him.
Sounds like he is using that as an excuse not to leave his wife and u r falling for it too.
2007-03-16 16:17:21 · answer #9 · answered by Truth Teller 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forget it, you said it yourself, the laws always favor the mothers....ESPECIALLY when daddy has been proven to be a cheating azzhole!
By the way, how do YOU know what type of mother she is??? Because HE told you??? He's cheating on and LYING to his WIFE, what makes you think he is being truthful to you?!
2007-03-16 16:00:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The first three words of your question's details says it all...
YOUR MARRIED BOSS
As in, he's legally joined with another woman.
AND he's your source of income.
AND there's a child involved.
AND if this works out and he eventually marries you, he'll be more likely to look for the next young cutie that comes around...
So, what's my advice?
GET ANOTHER JOB AND FORGET HIM!!
Nuff said.
Blessings
2007-03-16 16:04:43 · answer #11 · answered by Silverwolf 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋