How can you get back at someone that has betrayed you without having to do anything mean or ugly? My husband has betrayed me and I am moving away at least for awhile(his idea, but not b/c he lied or cheated b/c he still denies that). I don't want to do anything rude or mean, I just want him to stop and think "maybe I should have thought twice before I lied and cheated on her", or "what was I ever thinking letting her go?". My guess is that the best way to do that is to show him that I have other things going on in my life and that I will survive.
2007-03-16 15:50:57 · 11 answers · asked by love my life 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
you have the exact right idea..you are smart.
you never have to "get back" at someone..kharma, time, and God, will take care of that by itself...
you have a life and it's your choice to do, live and have the good things and people in your life. if you want a betrayer, which IS a liar and a cheater, then you deserve what will come from wanting that back in your life and it will always be in the back of your mind, so think this through very carefully.
giving the "gift of missing you" is good for most people and relationships at times.
good luck
2007-03-16 16:04:39 · answer #1 · answered by Gary G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best revenge is living well. The only way I would take back a cheating spouse, is if he was genuinely sorry. Your husband doesn't seem like he is sorry, b/c it's his 'idea' to send you away for awhile. How can he work on regaining your trust if he sends you away?
I would not call him, write him, email, chat, nothing. Move on with your life and focus on making your life better. If you don't have any children, you have no need to have him in your life, and if you do have kids, only speak to him regarding the kids. And if you can't do that right now have a relative be a middle man if they can remain unbiased.
Hopefully he will wish he never cheated on you but he won't feel that way unless he suffers the consequences of his behavior!
2007-03-16 15:56:51 · answer #2 · answered by myoctoberblues 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should do that anyway, show him that you have things to do in life besides him. You will survive.
There is a reason why he strayed. Maybe you were not such a cool thing to come home to or maybe you weren't as affectionate or something. Whatever that was, you should work on it.
There IS of course, an alternative. You married a boy and not a man. If he wants you to move out then I'd say it was over anyway. I just hope you have no children.
2007-03-16 15:55:26 · answer #3 · answered by cnith 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You answered your own question, the very best way to get him back is indifference and learning to live happily. It sounds like he has asked for time away which as you said is his idea, buys him time to decide what he feels for you. I am sorry but the best way since he should be the one begging you back, and hes not, the best way is dumping his a@@ for good.
2007-03-16 15:55:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's a cheater. he broke your heart, do you really want him back again? i know you may love him, but he failed at proving his love for you by doing this to you.
but if you really do want to make him think. maybe you COULD make him jealous some way. hang out with your best guy friend more now or something like that.
however, the plan might backfire and he will fight fire with fire.
2007-03-16 15:54:47 · answer #5 · answered by KikkomanLady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't do anything actively to get back at him. it's childish and petty. the best thing for you to do is move on with your life, and like you said, just life your life and let it be what it is. Be happy, succeed, and he'll realize that he messed up.
2007-03-16 15:53:56 · answer #6 · answered by begeeman13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he still feels that way about you, the distance will remind him of what he had.
But while you're out of the house, take steps to regain your life. Don't expect to come back.
2007-03-16 15:53:19 · answer #7 · answered by Ask Aunt Amy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best thing you can do to get back at him is ignore him. Guys hate being ignored. Let him know that what he has done/not done has no effect on your life.
2007-03-16 15:54:36 · answer #8 · answered by fritzpatch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the time you spend alone would actually do some good to you ! give him some time to think and you could calm down and show him that you could do better without him in your life ... if he still doesn't figure out what he's doing wrong and keeps on doing it ... just forget him ...
2007-03-16 16:04:36 · answer #9 · answered by krzy qt 911 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is revenge .... call it what you want but you are getting back at him.... revenge has never solved a thing and never will ... see a therapist and lay it all on the table and work things out...what you are doing is so very immature ....this is what happens when kids marry and try to play adult....good luck...
2007-03-16 15:56:29 · answer #10 · answered by ccseg2006 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋