how can i deal with strict parents?

Question

i was invited to my friends sleepover for the weekend but my dad told me that i couldnt go. i'm 17 about to turn 18 and my parents (my dad in particular)put ultra restrictions on everything that i do. I am a good student, i do everything that my parents ask of me and i hardly get into trouble. I am also getting ready to head off to college and i am so afraid that he will try to monitor everything i do. how can i explain to him, that im not a baby or a little girl anymore and to trust me to make wise decisions for myself?

Answer 1

Put up with them until you turn 18. Then pack your bags and things and move out.

Answer 2

my parents were the same way. I have a sister 1year younger and she got away with everything. I had to be the one to set the example. I was not allowed out on school nights, only until 10pm on weekends and if I was 1 minute late, I was grounded for the next weekend. They hated my friends and boyfriend, I was lucky to have one, and he probably cheated on me because I couldnt see him anyway. After you turn 18, trust me, it turns into a friendship with your parents. You actually start to respect their decisions and realize it was all for your own good. While I think your parents are going a little overboard, you need to sit them down and ask for their trust. Dont slam doors and scream, but talk to them like an adult. Parents are stubborn sometimes, but its because they love you so much that they are protecting you from any kind of hurt. I think if you are over sheltered, it can cause problems with the real world when you go out in it. It did for me. Until I talked to them for my first time as an adult. I am 40 now and they are my best friends. We hang out and can say or do anything and with all my failures and mistakes, they still love me. I now appreciate what they did then. I know its tough for you, but show them you are ready for adulthood and to just give you a chance. If they give you one chance and you are good they will give another. It will be hard but just talk to them. Good Luck!

Answer 3

It is hard to be a parent when your child is growing up. Sit down and talk with him. Ask him why he does not want you to go. He may have a good reason. Either way listen to what he has to say and then respond that you respect his feelings but that you too have your own reasons for wanting to go. Remind him that you have given him no reason to not trust your behavior and that he needs to trust you on these small things so that when you do leave for college he will not worry about you as much. No matter what you will always be his little girl but you can show him in small ways that you are all grown up.

Answer 4

Well you least sound like you love your parents, so that's a bonus. you making allowances for them is significant in your text, so be careful, slowly begin to challenge their choices without too many arguments, don't storm away and meet then head-on. If they are as good as i figure from reading your article, they are worth the time you have to give them to adjust to your maturity, whatever age that may be. Make little breaks at a time if you want to prove or convince them your able and capable to manage on your own. My parents where filth and i therefore have few regrets of being the rebellious teenager i where, only that has never clouded my judgment of others parenting ability. only you can decide that. Ultimately you will break free, so-to-speak, so if one must, just do it with a little care, perhaps the same care as they display to you?

Answer 5

The best way you can deal with it is to talk things out with both of them. The way you're presenting your argument, it sounds pretty reasonable. You can probably expand on it a bit. Have a good think about what you're going to say beforehand and think about how you'd expect them to respond as well. You might even want to take your folks to a family restaurant or something and foot the bill just to impress upon them the importance of this conversation to you.

Weather this works or not depends entirely upon the reasonableness of your folks. They might not even accept what you're trying to say then and there, but may understand as it sinks in. Try to be patient. It's very hard for parents when their kids reach your age. I know it's cliche, but there are a lot of scary things out there and it would hurt them more than anything else possibly could to lose you. I know it. I lost my brother.

Answer 6

Thats rough.. ask him if he has a good reason or if he sees some kinda danger in this sleep over. Mabey remind him you will out of the house soon and you would like to start making more decisions now to get more comfortable with that. Reassure him that he is your dad and you respect him but you just arent understanding why he is so strict and you are about to be out on your own it doesnt seem fair to you.

Answer 7

Ask your dad "what are you afraid of that you don't think I should go there". Then listen to him very carefully and see if you can come up with convincing reasons why you think you can take control of your actions. Give him some examples from recent months when you proved that you were able to make wise decisions. Good luck

Answer 8

If I were you, I'd listen to my parents. They've been around a lot longer, and they know the dangers that exist in the world. Believe it or not, you DO NOT. Plus, if you break with your parents, you'll lose the free ride. Life is extremely expensive. As far as your age goes, you are not a child. But you're not an adult yet either. Humans reach emotional adulthood at around age 30.

Answer 9

once you've tried talking, have you ever listened intently? what's your tone of voice? A gentle answer turns away anger. be affected individual and also you should win. Ask your father and mom' opinion about your acquaintances; there should be something about them or their life-type they see that you do not. perchance they opt to (over)look after you, by way of information they listen. it truly is called love. in case your father and mom have virtually no social life, perchance they are petrified of an empty nest. attempt asking in case you are able to invite your acquaintances over for dinner or dangle out at your position (or interior sight) sometime. That way they could see more advantageous heavily. yet when your acquaintances shop turning down invites, that should be a pink flag. Make new acquaintances. in spite of the case, comprehend that life is short and time passes right now. you in person-friendly words have one set of organic and organic father and mom. Honor and forgive them besides. associates will come and flow.

Answer 10

I would wait until you really ARE 18. Then tell them very nicely that now they have to mind their own damn business.

PS1 :

the degree of rudeness is in direct inverse proportion to the extent you are still financially dependent on them.

PS2

my youngrest daughter just turned 18.

She got herself a job at the Halifax Bank and moved in with her b/f..................., so maybe I'm a bit "soft". On the other hand, I left her in a new country and moved back 8000 miles to be with her mum....................

Answer 11

keep in mind that your parents probably love you and don't want to see you get in trouble..they will probably try to protect you your whole life...I'm sure they don't want to see you having a kid or stuck on drugs at a early age...or end up with some loser of a guy ....most parents want the best for their kids..you should be proud that your parents care that much...when you have a family you will hopefully be the same way... so feel lucky and remember mom and dad wont be there forever..so make them proud.and listen to them ....