I feel like a looser .... need some advice....?

Question

I used to run my own business before an year or so, then i got married and switched business cause of some partnership cause ... then went bankrupt... later i started doing job...days were bad in the start but steady from last year... its really worse.. that in these years our married life became weak. even job is not going well i earn good but no job satisfaction no action in life,,, my mind is not in my control i m feeling like such a looser that i am going to quit everything, wife, job, home and go away somewhere ... even i don’t know the destination

Answer 1

Running away from your problems won't solve anything.

No matter where you go, this situatuion will reappear in a different scenerio becuase that insecurity you have is still there.

I know this might sound corny but you need to stay positive.

Everything happens for a reason and in every negative there's a positive. You just need to learn to see it, and keep that thought in your mind.

My bf was a drug addict, he used to inject heroin and was in a lot of debt - bounced payments, black listed, income tax debt etc - the list goes on.

And i could have easily turned my back on him, but i didn't. I kept positive and that in turn kept him positive and sure, he relapsed a few times and betrayed me and lied to etc but i stuck at it.. within a year he was clean and we're stronger than ever.

The moral of the story is, if you're realationship has survived till now it'll only get stronger... it's better to go through the bad times straight away becuase that shows what your realationship can withstand.

by the sounds of things, you're actually a very lucky guy.. After being bankrupt you still got another job and yeah, maybe your r'ship isnt as strong as it was but it's survived! And it will get stronger, i promise you.

Many people in your situation wouldn't have bothered to get straight back into a job etc and would probably get very ill etc. The fact you're still here shows you're not a loser, you're far from it!

You've been through crap and you've bounced back.. be proud of yourself! You should be!

Answer 2

This happened to my husband and me. The thing I did was stop paying attention to him and not be there for him. The thing he did was have an affair. Both of those things were wrong.
In the past 2 years we lost a business, went bankrupt, foreclosed on our house and our investment property and the week after I found out about his affair the house we were renting burned down.(I swear I am not kidding)
We have learned so many things from each other in the year since the affair I now consider it a good thing because it caused us to communicate and be available to each other. You need to try your hardest to put what is important first and if it is just too hard to do that right now then you should get counseling. You sound very depressed, there are many medications you can go on to help you through this rough time. I needed medication to help with my depression, and therapy helps so much. Try really hard to find yourself again. If your wife and you can not work it out it does not mean you are a failure it means it was not meant to be. Keep an open mind and try to figure out where you want your life to be in 5 or 10 years, this can help you move forward in the right direction. You can also try reading The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. It is about how we all can improve our lives if we know the secret of the universe, think positive and positive things will happen to you. (it also comes in audio form). Good Luck! You are not a loser, you have just lost your place and need some help finding it again.

Answer 3

You can run a long way but when you get to where you are going ---you find you brought you and all your problems with you. Running away doesn't solve anything. OK so things are tough right now....Talk to wife---communication ( especially in bad times ) is important. If you feel you cant take to much anymore , go to Doctor and get help. Reorganise your priorities....Remember why you married your wife...Why you loved her. It isn't fair to her to give up so easily.Try God. There is comfort in his embrace. very baby has to learn to walk with taking a first step----Take a first step toward the better,don't back up and destroy not only your life but your family to. It will get better....You can do it....But you have to want it...

Answer 4

I agree with Julie, it does sound like you might be depressed. Maybe go see the doctor and explain this to them, and they will be able to tell you one way or the other. Also, talk to your wife/family/friends about how you are feeling, and they should be able to give you the support you need. But the good thing is, you've recognised the problem, and are seeking help already. If you persist with trying to fix it, things will get better. I hope this helps, kind regards, Penny.

Answer 5

You do seem to be quite confused. Sorry to read this. Of course you are not a looser, you are in a tough phase. See if could can find a councellor to help you get into action to get things right and feel ok. Work on your priorities and deal with one thing at a time.
And remember, what does not kill you makes you stronger.

Answer 6

Do it !! Go on do it !! Just do it !! Do it !! Do it !! Go do it!! Do it !! and take your wife with you start a new life get out of the rat race its not worth it. That's all your going to see out here is a bunch of people going nuts. Give it another 5 years and see how screwier the world get . Head for the hills. Do it!!

Answer 7

You need some spiritual or clinical therapy to help your depression. And then maybe you need to take some classes and get a new business or career. I know things seem hopeless but you are not that bad off that you should run off. Running away won't solve anything either but make it worse.

Answer 8

Go back to school, get you GED and with all the new knowlege that will be bestowed upon you, you will be able to get a more exciting job versus the one you are doing now.

Answer 9

Sounds like you have whats called depression,pop in and have a word with your doctor,you have been through a lot,and it isn't surprising that you feel this way,i am sure that this feeling is only temporary ,don't give up, to morrow's going to get better.

Answer 10

Life is a roller coaster. When you are down in the bottom, the only possible way to move is UPWARD!!!
Pacience, good drinks and faith will keep you going.
Good Luck