i m living a 4 years old married life now a days my wife quarrel so much on financial issues, yesterday we had a very harsh argument just because i spent 1000 bucks last month without telling her.
2007-03-16 11:23:02 · 28 answers · asked by adcconline 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
this is happening from so many days i m planning to leave everything and go away to some lonely place
2007-03-16 11:28:16 · update #1
You spent a thousand dollars without talking it over with her???? She should have been mad at you then! That is a BIG NO-NO!
2007-03-16 11:27:34 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well your first mistake was spending that kind of money without her knowledge. You should know by now that you have no mine money everything is shared so when you spend money like this and do not tell her she feels you are stealing from the financial structure of the household.
Really you need to stop keeping secrets from your wife everything must be communicated together as a couple
especially finances. When you marry having seperate accounts is just not right you have a joint account and everything that is spent is discussed first. If I were her I would take your head off too a grand is no small amount of cash.
2007-03-16 12:46:02 · answer #2 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Just because you have spent 1000 bucks"? I am not quite sure I understand your question. How much money are you making that makes a 1000 bucks worth hardly anything to you? For most people that does represent something and doing your own business on your own may not be the best way to share life with your wife. Does she spend the same amounts freely without you knowing? Would you mind her doing that and would your finances cope with this?
2007-03-16 12:47:14 · answer #3 · answered by Claire 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Open up the communication and you wont have this problem. By the way I would love to be able to say that I spent 1000 dollars without telling anyone, making it seem like it wasnt a big deal.
The point is that you did something she obviously has a control issue with, which usually women are the ones that have that problem. They just want to be notified so that if something happens and needs immediate attention, she knows she has the money available.
2007-03-16 11:28:28 · answer #4 · answered by David K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Everyone quarrels over money. It is true! Sit down and try to have a calm conversation and make out a budget on what needs to be paid and the money you have to play with for luxury. Split the luxury money down the middle and that will be your share. That way there is no complaint on what you spent YOUR amount on. It would be you choice. If things are out of hand take a breather from life. You both go away to a remote place..separate and sort out your thoughts. Good luck.
2007-03-17 08:10:41 · answer #5 · answered by Bella 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
JUST 1k....well considering i dont know what you are raking in as a monthly income, and dont know if you have a lot of bills, or kids, i dont know whether you have that kind of money to blow. If you do have money to blow, then maybe she is a control freak and you need to sit down and discuss that with her. If you have other obligations and responsibilities such as kids, or a lot of bills, then you should not be recklessly splurging on things you dont need. I noticed you didnt mentino what you baught. That has a lot to do with it too. Did you buy a washer and dryer bc yours was broken?? Or a play station with 12 games. Women like responsible and reliable men. I guarentee you she is trying to build stability, a safty net with the money she is trying to save, just bc it is in there doesnt mean you need to spend it. also, is your wife a spender??? I believe (being married myself) that you should set some boundaries, that way the line is never crossed. You should decide on an ammount to discuss with your spouse that is an "asking ammount" like anything over 100$ we ask eachother, that way the other one isnt spending the same ammount if that is all you have in the account andyou go under. It is about boundaries, respect, and the fact that you include her in what you decide on, a lot of that fight i guarentee you had nothing to do with the money, it was that you didnt ask her, she wants to be included. A women will use a topic to argue about something that really means something to her, with hidden messages inside, for some reason women expect men to read between the lines and catch on, but they dont, so women need to work on that. But back to the point.....you were wrong, ask before you spend large ammounts!!
GL
Dunkaroo
2007-03-16 11:45:19 · answer #6 · answered by dunk 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You spent $1000 without telling your wife, and you wonder why your having problems?? For starters, spend less money..(unless you spent it on bills or some payment). And tell your wife if your going to spend an amount like that! That is a lot of money...if I was her I'd be pretty mad too. Try marraige counseling. good luck
2007-03-16 11:32:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you keep going the way your going I see divorce in your future. What would you spend a grand on? If you thought you were doing the right thing you would have told your wife. Better start comunicating or you won't have a wife. The 2 biggest things that break up any marrage is #1 sex and #2 money.
2007-03-16 11:31:08 · answer #8 · answered by miester44 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Guess you forgot the question part but if your going to spend money why not tell her. And tell her your going to spend it anyway but your just letting her know about it. You and her need to talk and both of you'll need to agree on letting the other know when your going to spend a set amount of money and why? Also need to set up a budget and make sure it's done first before spending extra money. But without communication you and her will always agrue. So both of you'll sit down and discuss the situation together, without yelling or fighting because it isn't helping anything.
2007-03-16 11:30:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure I believe this is a serious question. I find it hard to believe that anyone would be surprised that their spouse was upset that they spend $1000 - Unless you're rich or something.
I'd have a freakin coronary if my husband spent that much on himself without telling me. If you consistently spend your money like this, I'm not at all surprised that you argue about it a lot. Your wife has a lot to be pissed at you about.
2007-03-16 11:42:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is that a lot of money for you two? If so, then it's something you should consult her with before spending. It's a courtesy that will keep the quarrels to a minimum. What did you spend the cash on?
2007-03-16 11:28:45 · answer #11 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋