i need help please?

Question

im just 14, im really upset, i just need some advice or responses. some time ago, my parents split up, and i used to live with my dad who had another wife who i loved so much, and a half baby brother who i loved. i loved my school, i was popular, the boys were crazy about me, i was pretty and slim and all, but now my mum took me away from all dat, and now my life is full of pathetic boredom, and im so depressed, in school i dont have friends, i dont know any boys at all (cuz i go to a girls all school) im so lost and depressed and i cry too much, ive gained so much weight, there are dark thick hairs growwing on my face, im so ugly now, i never go to any social events, i spent my time either at school, or at home infront of the TV or computer, and the most pathetic thing is i look at my only pictures of me about 5 years ago, and im actually jealous of my self, i had a great body, great skin, beautiful curly hair,and a wonderful slim face.isnt that pathetic?

Answer 1

baby girl, you need to find something to do out side of your house. something that would only improve yourself. like join a rock climbing gym or some type of sport. don't just time waste your life away. when you get older, you'll reflex upon what you did when you were 14. which is not much. so, no one can help you to get out from boredom except yourself. baby girl, go out and play.

Answer 2

Honey, it's not pathetic, it's puberty. And yes it sucks, and your looks are the most awkward they will ever be in your life, and everything seems so difficult and dramatic. And you'll get moody and confused and feel like nobody understands you.
But I guarantee you that everyone you know is going through the same thing to varying degrees, and all those adults who seem so stupid to you have all been through it too. They survived, and so will you.

Don't dwell in the past - so what if you were pretty as a little kid? In a few years you'll be gorgeous. You just have to accept that this is your "awkward age", the cocoon necessary to creating the beautiful social butterfly you'll become.
So don't let it be time lost - think of ways you can develop yourself now so you can reveal the person you want become. Sign up for a sport, join a club at school, join Girl Scouts or 4H (which are way more fun than you'd believe), focus on your good qualities.
And very important - throw away all your beauty magazines, and stop watching commericals. Both are designed to make you feel inferior so that you will buy products you don't need. Promise yourself that for each hour you spend moping in front of the TV or computer, you'll spend one hour learning yoga, jogging, reading a book, making friends, cooking for a club bake sale, etc.

Also, ask your parents if you can spend more time with your dad, maybe living with during the summers, since you enjoy life with him so much. But don't think it will magically cure all your problems - you still have to change your life if you want things to get better.

Good luck, little sister!

Answer 3

I think you are stuck in a vicious circle here. As awful as it may sound, kids these days won't want to be friends with someone who doesn't 'look right' (I don't agree with this, I think its just a sad fact of life). You also need to consider whether such fickle friends are worthy of your time. You were that slim popular girl once and you can do it again. Set yourself some goals and do your best to stick to them. If you feel better about yourself on the inside then that will shine through on the outside and will make you more appealing to those around you. It may be worth you visiting your doctor - maybe you have some kind of thyroid problem if you've put on lots of weight and have thick hairs on your face. I know its hard, but try not to feel down. Focus on your positive points (everyone has them!), smile more and the rest will follow in time. Good luck x

Answer 4

I am so sorry you feel this way. Maybe you should try going to some clubs in the area for people your age to make friends. About your weight and hair growing from your face.......I think you should speak to your mother. My sister had the very same probs and they are typical of a condition called Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. Don't be scared as | may be wrong but it sounds alot like it. It is treatable and it helps if you catch early on. If it is and you get medication your weight and excess hair will bew dealt with. You also need to tell your mother how the move has made you feel. You may be surprised by how much she can help you. Good luck.

Answer 5

Do you think you'll be at your moms beckinning forever? You are learning how to follow rules. Perhaps your father gave you way to much leash and you were on the road to nothing? Perhaps your mom has put you there so you can get on to a track that will take you in the right direction. You are still the same person as you were before. Nothing has changed unless you let it change. You are the one that has control over what you look like. You need to keep right what God made for the time when you are old enough to think on your own. Look in the mirror at who you are today and it will be obvious that you are not ready yet. Keep your chin up and do your school work, 20 years from now you will thank yourself.

Answer 6

wow...you must hate your mom for taking you away from your wonderful life. Look as much as how life sucks for you right now...you got to pick yourself up...instead of sitting in front of the TV and computer being obese GO GET some EXERCISE and start losing weight. Don't waste your life...there's still a long way to go ahead of you. If you hate where you are and who you are then do something about it. Make use of time and do something productive while your young. I don't want to say i understand you because i'm not you and i obviously don't know how you feel. I just believe that there's still hope and i wish you the best of luck.

Answer 7

No it is not pathetic.

It sounds like you are experiencing situational depression.

Look at all the changes that have occured in you life lately.

Who have you shared it with?

The body is not a storage unit.

You have to find a way to filter out the problems and the stress.

Please talk to a counsellor, tell her everything you have written in your letter.

Chances are she will be able to assist you with getting through what is a very difficult stage of growing up as it is.

Time to get that smile back.

Use your old picture for motiviation.

It is a realistic goal as it is you and not some supermodel that you wished you looked like.

T.V. off get outside and stop beating yourself up.

You are beautiful, believe it .

Answer 8

Best thing for you to do is to talk to your parents or see a guidence counselor. Maybe talk to some of your friends about what is going in your life. These years in your teen life are going to be the most crucial years as far as finding your identity. Crying about the past is not going to help. You cannot change the divorce, but you can change yourself and deal with your physical and mental health.

Answer 9

You need to find some things to do, TV is not it -- you are probably wit your mom because of your grades or something -- which the boys had some affect on. Mom and dad are trying to help you -- and you need to help yourself as well. If you know that you are getting fat -- what are you going to do about it. focus on you school for now improve on your grades and i am sure mom and dad both with allow you to do more. Boys included.

Answer 10

All our physical characteristics change and go on changing through out our life time.Friends depart from our lives and before you know it there are other Friends and Friendships that take shape. You just be the nice sensitive person that you were and still are. The best is ahead of you.