I have anxiety about it. I hate sex! I don't have time to get a buzz before going home and he doesn't like for me to drink, but that's the only way I can get in the mood. I just hate it so bad, I wish I never ever *had* to do it again. My husband is 50 and I hope that soon his sex drive will greatly decrease. I know some jerks will answer with that I must not love him or that I'm selfish....well, I love him dearly. I don't see what one has to do with the other.
Oh, god, I just can't stand it and I don't know what to do.
2007-03-16 09:28:38 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
get therapy
there's a reason you dont like it
i dont know what it is, but sex is meant to be fun
2007-03-16 09:32:02 · answer #1 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem.. It hasn't always been that way.. but I'm just not into it anymore.. by the time I get home from work or deal with our toddler and 2 older kids, cook dinner and clean, etc. I want to go to sleep and that's it. And I know when my husband wants to or when he's mad about it and it causes anxiety. I know it's not just completely because I'm so tired.. because 5-6 years ago I did the same stuff everyday that I am now but I would always initiate sex. It's like my lebido or whatever is gone. I talked to my doctor and he's recommended that I try counseling. he said that I might just be stressed or have problems in my relationship that I'm not consiously aware of. Maybe you should try that. I can't say if it works yet. Sorry I don't have better advice, but at least you know you're not the only one. Good luck!
2007-03-16 09:37:45 · answer #2 · answered by lv82 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think viagra can work on women too (ask a doc before you try). You could always eat a bunch of cloves of garlic and onions (raw if possible), then he may want to stay away.
Maybe he sucks at sex. Do you communicate that he doesn't satisfy you? Not sure what the prob is, could be your hormones, or he's not good at giving you what you need, or you just don't have a sex drive.
I've read in places like Savage love where a partner lets their other partner have sex with others....personally I couldn't do that though.
2007-03-16 09:36:19 · answer #3 · answered by ANSWER MY QUESTION!! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not easy to admit you don't enjoy sex when so many people do. But maybe the issue goes deeper than what your disclosing. I know I often am not "in the mood" but honestly my issue is I don't concentrate on the present. My mind drifts off to the days when I used to have to beg for sex and he was to busy having affairs of his own. We sought help and eventually recovered. But recently my feelings have changed.
2007-03-16 09:39:15 · answer #4 · answered by juju baby 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Find something that gets you in the mood other than drinking. Every woman has something....and it is not normal to hate it that bad! It is our duty to give our husbands what they want....even if it doesn't make us happy!
2007-03-16 09:47:35 · answer #5 · answered by AdoptiveMama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Amen sister you're preaching to the choir. I too experience the same problem. I'm just so over it and as well can't get into it unless I've got a buzz.
What I typically do is either just let it happen to please him and sometimes I will actually get into it. Or either just be plain "too tired" "headache" "really bad cramps" just to get out of it.
It's really a tough situation and I could live without it myself. So my sympathy goes out to you
2007-03-16 09:52:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why in the world did you get married if you hate sex? Let me tell you something, if you hate sex so much, then you need to get off of my planet.
2007-03-16 13:16:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You probably don't feel any passion for him any more. That´s life. I don't think you are tired of sex...if you should fall in love again you would probably enjoy sex again. You love your husband of course but the passion is gone, that´s it.
2007-03-16 10:05:23 · answer #8 · answered by ullis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take one for the team. It's a necessity for guys, a need if you will. I do it when I'm not in the mood because it makes him happy. Nothing wrong with that!
2007-03-16 09:34:09 · answer #9 · answered by SillyKimmie 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You poor thing, can you just go with the flow and fake it a little!!
I know is not that the right thing to say, but I can't think of anything else.
2007-03-16 09:33:04 · answer #10 · answered by hayde_kat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a serious problem lady. Is it because he is lousy at sex, or because you have some kind of past trauma?
I believe you love him. Take his needs seriously, however. Find a way to fix this. Get to your doctor if it's a serious problem.
2007-03-16 09:33:51 · answer #11 · answered by Disco Stu 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋