Is it right to feel the way I do when i going to have a baby?

Question

Okay well I'm 17years old and i'm 21 weeks prego.... But the thing is i feel all alone;Like i have no one! I don't know why I feel this way because the baby daddy is here for me,My mom and my whole family is here. I look at pic's from me and my friends at the beach and at partys and i sit back and think man i miss hanging with my friends,go places ,be able to ride rides, be able to go to a partys. I mean I love my little girl more then anything in this world but I'm starting to feel like the world is passing me by. I guess what i wanted to know is it rite for me to feel this way or is it that i'm a bad mother?

Answer 1

I wouldn't say that that makes you a bad mother, but it sounds like you were not ready to settle down and be a mother yet. The feelings may pass when baby is born.
Having a baby is a life changing event. That is something most teenagers don't realize.
Your childhood is passing you by and now are stuck with the joys of parenting. Which is a great thing when the time is right. It's hard to say if the time is right for you until she's here. A lot or mothers feel this way till then.
Hope you the best.

Answer 2

You are going to be fine. I am 37 and 23 weeks prego and I still have those feelings.

You are young, you will be making a huge sacrafice in your life by choosing to raise your baby, this shows you have great character. Having a baby is not the end of the world, you will still be able to do things especially if you have a supportive family your Mom Im sure realizes that you are still young and need to do young person things and she will probably be a great grandmother and help to you so that you can still do some of the things that 17 year olds are supposed to be doing.

You will start to feel better once the baby is born, you are already over halfway done with your pregnancy which is great! By the time summer rolls around you will have a beautiful baby and you will be a little more able to do some of those things you would like to do with some help from friends and family.

Just know that you are not alone in the way that you are feeling. If it gets worse or you start having worse thoughts you should definately talk with your doctor, you could be suffering from anatal (sp?) depression, sort of like post-partum but during the pregnancy instead of after, I think I suffer from it mildly but some have it much worse and there is help for it.

Congrats on your pregnancy and dont worry, youll be a great mom!

Answer 3

I was 17 when I got pregnant with my first child and a senior in high school and I have to admit I went through the same thing... You will lose some friends but just think of it this way if they were true friends they would be there to share the Joy with you, and I went places and still hung out at the beach ( no rides @ Busch Gardens) just because you are pregnant doesn't mean you have to sit at home and do nothing and once the baby gets here you will have so much to do that you won't even have a minute to think about all you don't get to do anymore because you will be so happy with the new things this baby has brought to your life

Answer 4

Of course you aren't a bad mother, you're just thinking about what will change for you and missing the things you like to do. That's normal, nomatter what your age is, and you are young and probably have friends who aren't considering motherhood just yet and are all about partying and having a good time.
Keep in mind you will still be able to go out once in awhile, maybe not like how you used to, but it can still happen. Also keep in mind that, while having your baby girl will be the hardest challenge yet for you, the rewards are SO, SO incredible, far better then hanging with your friends. The first time she smiles at you, the first time you see her....all the things you miss about the free life without her as a responsibility won't seem so exciting anymore. You are going through a time where your horomones are going nuts and you are going to feel alone at times, but once you have your baby girl you will feel a bond like nothing else. Good luck to you!

Answer 5

No, it is perfectly normal. I feel that way sometimes and I am married to a wonderful man and have 3 kids and we chose to have more. It is a mixture of hormones and the fact that all you have said is true. You have a long hard road ahead of you. You will have to work very hard at making sure that later you don't go out and party and do those things that you missed. (my sister did that when she was 40 because she felt she had missed out, almost ruined her marriage) You need to focus on finishing school and starting college online. Find things to do that head you in the direction of adult hood. Unfortuantly you have to enter it a tad bit early. You are one of the lucky few that have family around. Cherish that fact. You will be okay and as long as you keep a good head, which is sounds like you do, you can logically think through these emotions. Just dont let them get the better of you. Good luck

Answer 6

No your not a bad mother, ithink at any age ( i am 37 ) when your having a baby you begin to realise that this is a life changing experience. You can still go out with your friends in moderation, i find that i don't really want to leave my little man and go out with friends we do things as a family, my husband and i have been out once since the birth of our son and that was only for 3 hours he is 51/2 mths now, you will find that your priorities will be different. Being a mother or father is a big responsibility you have this little person who relies on for everything . i think your just realising that your life will change , but you have the father there and your family for support you will be OK . enjoy being pregnant i think its the best feeling having this little person moving and growing inside you

Answer 7

It's normal to feel that way. Once your child is born, you will grow attached. Don't get me wrong, you will miss going out and not having the responsibility of raising a child. But you will find that raising a child, although frustrating at times, will be more rewarding that any party could ever be.

Trust me, I know the feeling. I was pregnant at 21, and I spent my 22nd birthday pregnant in Germany at Oktoberfest, where all there is to do is drink and ride rides, neither of which I could do. I felt left out, lost, lonely. I was sleeping by 8 o'clock on a friday night while all my friends were out at clubs. And even now it's hard to find the time to get out with my friends and my son is one. It's a tough job, being a mother, and it changes your life in every way imaginable. But that's life, and I wouldn't change it for the world. =)

Answer 8

You have every right to feel this way. Not only are you going through a massive hormonal, physical and life change, but you are also a teenager who feels that she should be out there living it up and doing stupid teenager things. The thing is, now you can't do those things and you are feeling blue about it. You need to remember that although you will now be responsible for another life you can still live your life and have a great time, and even better, you get to share it with someone who loves you unequivocally.

If the feelings persist though go see a counsellor who can help you deal with it. Don;t be scared to ask for help, if your family and boyfriend are as supportive as you say they are they will help you.

Answer 9

wow..I know how u feel. I just turned 19 & I'm 32wks pregnant. It sucks that it happened right when I'm just starting to enjoy my freedom & start my life. I used to travel a lot, go to concerts & all that fun stuff. It the beginning I was sad a lot that I'm "missing" all these things. But now I feel better that my baby will be here soon & we'll be able to do things together. I can't wait to take her to the beach!! lol But also I know I'll have someone to watch her if I wanted to go out sometimes & enjoy the last of my teen years. You're not a bad mother. Remember that everything happens for a reason & soon u'll be able to go out & start doing things again...& then u'll have ur sweet lil baby to come home to.

Answer 10

It is normal for you to feel like you are missing out, because the reality is that you are. This is why it is advised that young people abstain or use protection. Because you aren't truly ready to give up your "fun" life. Unfortunately you have no choice now (unless you consider adoption), so though it is "normal" it doesn't make you a bad mother, just an honest one. When you have your little girl, you will have such a different life and be so busy that you won't notice as much, and you will make friends with other moms. Be patient!