Ok. So here's the story. We had plans to move back to cali. After 6 years together. He never cheated before, but I went ahead of him to get our stuff together. Then he never called. Not even on our daughters and my birthday. My women's intuition said he cheated. After he got out here, it took him about 5 months to admit he did. But why? This girl is not pretty, smart, or anything I would find attractive in a human being. Not to mention, he cheated with his best friends girl! I am soo effin' mad. I really want to make the drive out there to kick her a$$. I kicked his already, bad behavior for a 30 year old woman, but MEN PLEASE ANSWER.....WHY HER???? He only says " I don't know" when I ask him. I don't know if I can get pass this but I don't want to throw away almost a decade of my life, and he is the father of my kids....WHY! That mother f.cker. That *****! How dare she!
2007-03-16 07:30:54 · 3 answers · asked by Heather m 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I get asked by women a lot about why men cheat. Here goes....men have to make a conscious effort to not cheat. Men and women are not only physically different, but we also have a different internal makeup (chromosomes, brain activity, etc.). I have talked to many guy friends of mine and we ALL think this way. A man can truly love a woman and want to have sex with another. The act of sex for us CAN be only a physical connection with no emotions. We don't seek out wanting to hurt our girlfriends/spouses, but the desire to explore can be come great. This is where making a decision, as I mentioned before, comes into play. You weigh the risks involved. I admit that I cheated on girlfriends all the time. I'm married now and I have to decide if sex with another is worth losing my wife and kid....it's not.
Women will say that they have a good man who doesn't think about cheating. I have news for you....we ALL think about it, the question is "do we act upon it"?
Do you really want to test your man ladies? Hire the hottest woman you can find to hit on him while he's out with the guys. Have her tell him that all she wants is a casual "f" with no strings attached and see what he does. You may be disappointed in his choice.
2007-03-19 04:11:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's obvious from your post that you are still really upset about this, and understandably so. However, if you ever really want to find out why he did it, you need to ask him, and you need to communicate with him in such a way that isn't threatening to him.
I had an ex-boyfriend that would just refuse to tell me anything that he knew I wouldn't want to hear, because he hated to see me cry. It was so incredibly frustrating, because there was no communication about the really tough issues.
If you can calm yourself down enough to have a conversation with him about it without threatening, without getting upset or yelling, without crying, without accusing or jumping down his throat... then let him know that. Tell him that you really just want to talk about it and that you'll be as diplomatic as possible.
If this isn't a feasible option, however, I'd recommend finding a counselor, pastor, or some other mediator who has professional training and may be able to talk to him about his issues in an unbiased way.
Good luck
2007-03-17 04:51:02 · answer #2 · answered by wnk 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did he cheat? Because she was there and would have sex with him. A guy needs no more reason then that. A guy want to have sex all the time....so most guys will rarely pass up a chance to do so. And it does not matter who she is....as long as she is a female.
2007-03-17 09:22:39 · answer #3 · answered by null_the_living_darkness 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋