How do I handle this when I enjoy my friendship with her and see her frequently but she has asked for us to come over and have dinner and I give excuses (she doesn't know that my hubby now knows they swing). My hubby is disgusted with her husband , because I notified him of her hubby hitting on me(even though I told him "get the thought out of your head it will NEVER happen") He says it is complete disrespect her husband showed towards him. Now I am curious as to how I smooth things over with my friend whom I have to see on a regular basis.
2007-03-16 02:49:47 · 7 answers · asked by Joseph & Eileen D 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Personally I don't blame your husband for being upset.If another person hit on my spouse I would be to.As for your friend you need to be honest with her.Let her know why your hubby is mad.Talk to your hubby to I am shure he is still upset,give him time to cool off.Good luck
2007-03-16 03:03:35 · answer #1 · answered by Heather T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just go out with her by yourself......go for a coffee or something, and explain to her the situation. Tell her you are not interested in swinging, and tell her how your husband feels about that.
If she is a good friend, she will still invite you both over to visit, without the come-ons. That's something that you need to explain to your hubby to.....he would probably be upset that your friends hubby has hit on you, therein lies the problem.....your hubby has got to forgive and forget if you are both to remain friends with the other couple.
2007-03-16 02:57:46 · answer #2 · answered by wombat2u2004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because they are swingers doesn't mean they are trying to swing with you. We have many non-swinger friends and we would never, ever try to get them naked with us. We have plenty of swinger friends for that. Just because we swing doesn't mean we swing with everyone.
But, being that they are more secure in their relationship and in their sexuality then others, he may simply be more flirtatious and therefore you and your hubby are mistaking that for him hitting on you.
What I would do is talk to your friend about how it is making you uncomfortable and you'd appreciate it if she would talk to her husband about it. He probably doesn't even know he's making you uncomfortable. And if they really are great people (and I would guess they are based on how positive you talk about your friend) he will get the picture and feel terrible he made you feel that way.
As far as your husband? I don't know what to say. It sounds like he has already made-up his mind about your friends based on his own insecurities and social conditioning. This may be a tougher sell.
2007-03-18 09:20:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself if your friendship with this person is worth the trust of your husband. Maybe you should end the friendship - make some new friends with non-swingers.
2007-03-16 02:54:59 · answer #4 · answered by J F 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
who is more important to you? whoever that is, respect his/her wishes. this problem is of a sexual nature, your husband is right in this situation. being around "swingers" will only get you in trouble.
2007-03-16 02:56:11 · answer #5 · answered by in2one 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your husband is right. I think you should let your girlfriend go. If she can't keep her husband's mind off you, his hands are next.
2007-03-16 02:54:20 · answer #6 · answered by Zeera 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her the truth and tell her that her husband overstepped his bounds with your husband see if she can maybe get her husband to apologize to your husband...
2007-03-16 02:54:56 · answer #7 · answered by luv41anatha 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋