Why does my hubby cheat on me through websites?

Question

He is getting flirty with women and goes on the net to secret sights using a different e-mail to talk, fantacize and do other things with other women. I've asked him in the past WHY and he says its not him doing it when I know for sure it is him.

Answer 1

Maybe you need to find out what kind of women he's looking at on the net and put them to shame. Men and women begin to look at other people when the spark is gone from the marriage. Often times the sex isn't as pleasurable anymore. Have a conversation with him about his fantasies and tell him about yours and y'all should both try and please each other. Sex shouldn't be the same old routine over and over again. Try some new things. You too should check out Chris Rock's new movie I think I love my wife.

Answer 2

Ok, guys will ALWAYS, ALWAYS, did I say always yet? they will always need a visual. We'll hold your hair out of your face for a view, try and keep the lights on, and yes, watch others to! Haven't you? I'm guessing by your question that you have not. So what you need to do is get on line, see what he's looking at, and repeat it with him! The guy wants something new. Not that he is bored, he just wants to know what else there is, and how to do it. Help the guy out, try and teach him something new. Shoot, it is just the two of you, be creative do something borderline degrading. Don't do anything that will hurt you (without practice first) but do something that might need a shower after wards, or for that matter, follow him to the shower!
And for gawds sakes, don't call this on line thing cheating! He is still by him self, so is it really that much different from Suave and tissue paper with a girlie mag, or is that cheating to?

Guys are dogs! We want the unconditional love, and we will be life long loyal to those people. We love praise, but scolding (or guilt trips) only make us more distant towards that person, and find a place to hide to do the things that person thinks we shouldn't

Answer 3

With men cheating 60% of the time and women 40%, I don't think it's for the reasons people assume (just sex or for the thrills, etc).

In fact, I assume that, contrary to social opinion, monogamy isn't normal for all people. Unfortunately, society isn't accomodating to those who want to be both honest and are not naturally monogamous. Open relationships are seriously frowned upon.

Most guys or girls don't cheat to get sex. It happens, but not to most people, IMO. Most fall into a relationship unexpectedly and only have two options they see open to them. Leave the new relationship, which is brutally difficult, or cheat. Society has shown them only those two choices.

I am polyamorous. I am very open about my feelings and non-monogamous nature. I always make certain everyone involved is aware and OK before I enter into a relationship (their significant other, if they have one, and my wife). Though sex is a component of these romantic relationships, it's no different than anyone with a girlfriend or wife. They are long term and very loving relationships.

For those who are not monogamous, but not interested in long-term romantic relationships (i.e. sex is the more important aspect) and want to be open and honest with their partner, there is swinging. I"ve never experienced it, so cannot talk about it much.

I've always wondered why people find cheating (breaking the rules) more acceptable than open and honest non-monogamy.

Answer 4

Because to him, he is sitting at a computer. How could he be physically cheating on you, when he's physically doing the same thing he'd be doing in a game of solitaire....sitting at a computer.
Take it from me. I've been happily unmarried to the same woman for 13 years. We have a great sex life. I STILL go to websites and spank it. Does that mean we should split up? Am I cheating on her? No. I don't think so. We are happy, because I make her happy, and she makes me happy.

This all stems from the debate of whether or not it is really healthy for 2 people to stay together for the rest of their lives, but that's another can of worms.....

If you know where his heart is, you don't have to worry about the computer stealing your hubby away. Just put out when he wants it, and he'll love you for it. He can't know that a woman on the other end of the wire is going to make him happy like you do, so just make sure he knows he can be happy with you.

Answer 5

Its sort of a hard question to answer because we or I don't know him. From what I know of guys he is probably not happy with some aspect in his life. Doesn't mean you just means something. Maybe he has an addiction to that sort of thing. I think that is A LOT more common then we know about. Not just porn but needing that attn from women. Being able to get that attention with out having to make any sort of commitment on his part can seem alluring. A sense of power with no risk in other words. The bigger issue is if he is indeed doing it ..that he is lying to you and that is a sign of a much bigger problem. You need to be completely open and honest with him and force the issue otherwise he will completely ignore it and hope it goes away. If he wants to be in a relationship with you then he needs to meet you halfway on this. Otherwise its just another way of filling his needs with no risk to him while yours remain unmet and that's not fair. good luck.

Answer 6

The internet provides a 'safe' and 'innocent' way to flirt and have a virtual affair. No risk from the physical part of a relationship.. no STDs, pregnancy, someone showing up at your door, etc. With the reduced risks, cyber activity becomes more of a game.... 'how far can I go with somone' type of thing. And its a lot easier meeting people online than it is in real life. Those are the 'why's.... but...

That said... it is still cheating... taking time and attention away from you. The fact that he lies about it is also a bit troubleing.

Answer 7

In his mind... This is an opportunity for him to be the stud he THINKS he is in his mind. This is how insecure some men are. Impressing women with their own selfish delusions can be a real ego booster for the secretly weak and broken spirited. Those who point and click their way through the world wide web of lies in search of a thrill, most likely have failed at a thrilling reality. Or maybe I'm just sleepy.

Answer 8

Guys will justify this behavior as 'not cheating', as they say they are having some harmless fun on the internet. However, the truth of it is, they are cheating. It is not only disrespectful to their wife, but no woman wants their husband lusting for other women whether it be in pornography, personal web sites, or private e-mails. He could very well be addicted to porn, as men tend to be very secretative about this behavior. For information, you should 'google' pornography addiction for more information. Seriously, I think the only way to make him stop is to Pull The Plug.

Answer 9

You can read every where he goes by the temporary Internet files and history. If you want to know all his yahoo address let me know. I will tell you how to know all he does on line if you email me.
Why does he cheat? Ask him. Then delete his profiles like I did. It caused a lot of fights. But I eventually won.
By the way. I confront. I confronted the women on line. LOL They no longer talk to him.

Answer 10

See, I would think the general rule on this is 'look but don't touch'. We've been married 12 1/2 years, and yes I know my husband will sometimes look at sites. But has never taken it passed that. He comes home to me @ night. If there are calls, and emails. That's when I would become curious. I know I would say.. Its me or them, if he chooses them, then your better off without him.