I am going to deliver a baby in four weeks and I am feeling jealous of Daddy's other two childeren. This is my first child, and I am feeling dissapointed that we cant share in this experience for the first time together. He has already seen and done this....twice nonetheless. I almost feel a little hurt inside that it wont be our first, together. I would never talk to him about this, because I wouldnt want him to think it has any thing to do with his other two childeren. I just wish I was first ya know? Is it wrong to have these feelings?
2007-03-16 02:03:37 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You always knew that he had 2 other children so it's no surprise. I have 3 children of my own and each time was a wonderful - unbelievable experience. The 2nd and 3rd did not take away the joy I had for the 1st. You should absolutely share this experience together - Why wouldn't you? Is he there for you?
I think as long as he is actively involved in your pregnancy, is enjoying the time, taking care of you, giving you the attention you deserve and is looking forward to having this baby, I think you'll be happy.
On the other hand - if he seems disinterested in having this baby then your feelings are justified and unfortunately greater problems may persist...
This is your first pregnancy - enjoy it. That's something know father will ever understand (the birthing process)
2007-03-16 02:18:47 · answer #1 · answered by Champ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no, not "wrong", but they are unjustified. You are going thru something very special for the first time, and you want your significant other to feel the exact same way. You knew he had other children when you got PG, so logically now, 8 mos later, you know you can't undo those 2 other kids and his experiences seeing them born. This doesn't mean he won't find the birth of your child just as special, and likely your feelings of comparison will fade.
2007-03-16 09:09:40 · answer #2 · answered by GEEGEE 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why are you jealous of your husband's other children? Are they from a previous marriage(s)? Is he spending quality time with them instead of you and his unborn baby? Is the reason that he's spending time with his other children because of you, and that since you're just about ready to give birth, that you are being somewhat cranky? Maybe you are chasing him away by acting unreasonable and not know it. And if he doesn't care for you at all, then why did you allow yourself to become pregnant with his child? Why didn't you just walk away in the first place?
It's not wrong to have ill feelings towards your husband(?) and his two children, if those feelings are truly justified, meaning that he's totally abusing you and his unborn child, whether it be physical or verbal. But if those feelings are from jealousy, you'd better change your attitude, because it will surely end your current relationship.
Talk with one another. No yelling or screaming, no verbal accusations or blaming, just listen to one another. In a civil tone, just discuss what the issues are, and see if it can't be resolved efficiently.
If possible, get to know your husband's(?) other children. You are not their mother, but you can become a good friend to them. Get to know their likes and dislikes, try to help them with problems that they may have in school or in general. Be supportive to them, not financially but morally. You must be willing to earn their trust and respect, and they may just give you the same in return. And if trying to relate to them fails, than at least you can look yourself in the mirror and say that you tried.
Good luck!
2007-03-16 09:30:29 · answer #3 · answered by midnyt12 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Let me summarize for my own understanding...
You're 19 y/o, you got pregnant before getting married, you're going to get married AFTER having the baby, you're having sex with the baby-daddy 4 weeks before giving birth, you're unsure about the future success with your fiance, the baby-daddy has two other children by two other women that he's not married to, and you still want to be with him?!?
Wow! Have you called to be a candidate to be on the Jerry Springer show?
2007-03-16 11:17:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you have every right. But it can be different with you, because you can make it extra special. Maybe the other 2 mothers have no idea how to make a man feel wanted, or tell them that they are doing a good job.
2007-03-16 09:09:52 · answer #5 · answered by Solar Ball 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
no, its normal. and it is a first - the 1st time he will share that experience with you! Just enjoy that thought.
2007-03-16 09:06:48 · answer #6 · answered by just me #1 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
nah I dont think so
2007-03-16 09:06:24 · answer #7 · answered by Mary 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋