When a couple stops communicating for a few years. And created a lot of issues that is hard to resolve.
Should they try hard to make it work or just simply leave and find their self-esteem again?
2007-03-16 01:04:33 · 13 answers · asked by Had enough 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
There's no children involved.
Not sure if you call that abuse or not. But emotionally I am not myself during this marriage (over 7 years). I did a lot of things that my husband wants me to but not what I don't normally do. Because they are the "right" thing to do. I ended up being frustrated, annoyonned and lost interest in anything.
I don't know if I still love him, I hate it when he is around. I don't want to talk to him as anything I say is wrong in his eyes. I don't miss him at all during my 3-week holiday recently....
What is love?
2007-03-16 01:33:46 · update #1
If the communication has stopped for even ONE year, then you know something is definitely wrong. A few years (even after TWO years) would say it's time to split or have serious marriage counseling. I suggest they have a "trial separation" for two months or so, where they meet & date others. If they find themselves back in each others' arms, realizing they truly love each other, then they should stay. If they're happy dating others, well, you know the answer to that one...
2007-03-16 01:09:00 · answer #1 · answered by Dusk 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there has been no communication for years and you don't miss him after three weeks, it was time to leave a long time ago. It sounds like you lost your sense of self during that 7 years trying to please him. You should never have let him do that to you. You have to please yourself, too. HE needs to please you as well. If you think you want to make it work, try a trial separation first, if for no other reason than to figure out who YOU are again. Love is when he tries to make you as happy as you make him. Love is working through the tough times TOGETHER, not putting blame on one person. Love is supposed to make you happy, not miserable. If you are always thinking of him and wanting to be with him and genuinely wanting to please him (not because it's the right thing to do, but because it is what you FEEL), then it's love. I say go ahead and leave at least for a little while to get your head clear. Then make a decision.
2007-03-16 02:04:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I had a nickel for everyone who wondered about the answer to this one... There is no "should" or right/wrong answers here. You really have to get deep-down honest with yourself and look very hard inside for the answer. It's there. You already know what to do. You need to find your self-esteem either way, though. Lots of luck to you - that's a tough one.
2007-03-16 01:10:19 · answer #3 · answered by redskinscheer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if their hasn't been any adultry or abuse and you both still really love each other but you have just lost yourselves in lack of comunication then you should meet with your church pastor or a marriage counselor to try and save the marriage... Be prepared becasue you both have probably built up alot of anger towards each other and acuse each other for the way you have grown apart be willing to listen and just take it all in until you get your chance to speak... I heard something a long time ago when my husband & I first got married. "speak without offending and listen without defending"
2007-03-16 01:23:40 · answer #4 · answered by B-E-B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I pat you on the back for stickin it out for a few years. Move on. It will never change, doesn't matter how many counsellors you see.
You can love someone and you don't have to live with them.
Who knows, a separation could do you both good.
Lots of luck.
Lifes to short to stay in a unharmonious situation.
2007-03-16 01:10:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hard to say because every situation is different. Personally, I am a "tryer" but I have a saturation point where it is better to break clean and get it over with.
2007-03-16 01:19:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you find your self always thinking about that person or wanting to be around them and you can say you love them in the middle of an arguement, then stay, but if not and its just about the sex or because of money or looks then jus let it go. you dont wanna get yourself to deep into something your not sure about because it might not go right and you might hurt her feelings.....
2007-03-16 01:10:32 · answer #7 · answered by Deonte S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are not married and have no kids then it s time to say see ya for sure if they have kids maybe some time apart to see if they still have feelings for each other
2007-03-16 01:10:00 · answer #8 · answered by charlene M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could give you the perfect answer but I'm kind of in the same boat to.
2007-03-16 01:20:54 · answer #9 · answered by guardianangel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It hurts but it may be time too move on,I have the same issue right now!
2007-03-16 01:10:17 · answer #10 · answered by BigRig 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋