one of my friends is dating this wonderful guy for about 1 1/2 yrs. he is seperated from his wife and has been for over 2 yrs. he talk to her about getting married to her all the time --he willmarry her some time--but he is still legally married and wont get a divorce. he claims that he is comfortable the way things are but is saving money for a divorce. they are living together and there are kids involved--but not together. she has some and he has some. what do i tell her?
2007-03-15 17:22:04 · 14 answers · asked by annieluvsgary 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh...this guy is probably never going to get a divorce and is equally unlikely to marry her. He's already getting everything he wants. She should have never agreed to living with him until she got to see the divorce decree.
2007-03-15 17:25:19 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is so wonderful, then why is he committing ADULTRY! GET REAL! You do not propose to somebody else when you are still married! I'm sorry if you don't like my answer, but it's from the heart! If he were a decent man would have done the right thing, and got a divorce, even if it meant working two jobs to pay for it, before he moved in with your friend, and proposed to her. She needs to put him out, and tell him that he needs to find someplace else to stay until after his Divorce is final, and that she won't be waiting until the Fourth of Never for him to do it either! P.S. I feel the sorriest for the poor little kids who have them as role models! What a shame!
2007-03-16 00:35:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's tricky. It might be totally over between him and is wife but maybe he doesn't want to let go. It's going to be a big drastic change. They should really sort something out quick, it's not fair that he is leading his kids on. The kids are probably wondering when mummy and daddy are going to get back together. Your friend needs to lay down the law with this guy. It seems that more than her are going to be continuously hurt out of this.
2007-03-16 00:29:52 · answer #3 · answered by Elyse h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to tell him again that she wants him to get a divorce and marry her. Give him a time frame and if he doesn't do it, she need to move out. Right now, he's having his cake and eating it too. They live like a married couple, only they aren't. He needs to know she is serious. And she needs to be prepared that the relatioship may end, but at least then she can find someone who does want to marry her.
2007-03-16 00:57:48 · answer #4 · answered by Marina D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...if that isn't disaster waiting to happen on so many levels. Well in that she is involved we will just say that her judgment is clouded by all the obvious pitfalls. But hey...you have the opportunity to play true friend here since you are I am sure, very clear headed. So try this thinking on for size. First and foremost, if there are kids involved how many bad messages are we sending them...its ok to only have a one parent home......its ok to live with another woman while married to my mom......its ok for another woman to be with dad who is still married....... and its ok for my mom to live with a married guy. I don't know...as her friend, is that enough ammunition for you to try and bring some sense to her. Ok how about some more....The line I love is the blatent honesty he tells your friend. He tells her he doesn't want things to change because he is comfortable..Well I guess so...geez...He has it all doesn't he......Can have sex with another woman and play house with her while trying to fool himself that he still has the facade of a family situation at his other home. Your friend should run...not walk, but run from this guy. Ma'am....you have some talking to do with your friend....I would get started....Good Luck!
2007-03-16 00:39:56 · answer #5 · answered by chcman74 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hes not saving up mney for a divorce...if they divorce SHE will pay for it.. He is just a no account looser, that wants his cake and wants to eat it too..and if there are kids involved chances are he wont be able to support a new wife and pay child support..tell her to go find a man with no strings.
2007-03-16 00:36:12 · answer #6 · answered by Dana D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow somebody bought the line of crap, I had boss that claimed he and his wife were divorced and just lived in the same house for the kids, had a girl friend and all, then his wife started work their and All of a sudden it was his wife again, and the girlfriend was out of her job too.
2007-03-16 00:50:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's not going to divorce his wife! tell her to wake the f*** up!
if its been over for 2 years and they were 2gether for 1 1/2 has he really had time to get over her!
2007-03-16 00:29:28 · answer #8 · answered by dominicana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL...sorry..this sounds like my hubby!! He is living with a gal who has kids and refuses to divorce me. Its basically up to me to file the papers. He doesn't want me to because he knows once I do his mistress(not what I usually call her) will be all over him about getting married and he has NO intentions of ever getting married again. But yet he is living with her and she is supporting him because all of his paycheck goes to supporting me and the kids! LOL...tell her she needs to cut her losses and move on! I have already caught my hubby lying to his gal on the phone about me being with him!!! So he cheated on me...he is lying to her..its never ending! Once a liar and cheater...always a liar and cheater
2007-03-16 01:35:03 · answer #9 · answered by mysweetluvie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
save as much money as you can,file for a divorce with legal aid,while saving money when you get enough get the heck out of there
2007-03-16 00:42:49 · answer #10 · answered by kat_luvr2003 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋