I am 12 weeks pregnant, work-full time far away from home and have a 3 year old. My husband doesn't understand what I am going through and is not helping out with the household chores nor is taking the time to comfort me. I've been financially supporting us for a few years and now that he has a job doesn't want to pitch in 50% because I make a lot more money than he does. He is in his mid 20's and I am in my early 30's. I am getting fed up with his behavior and I can't seem to get through to him. At this point, I am extremely angry and thinking about asking him to move out. Does anyone have any thoughts or suggestions? I am worried that I may be overreacting since I am pregnant but he doesn't seem to care about my feelings and doesn't even attempt to help me out in any way.
2007-03-15 15:54:28 · 14 answers · asked by 2Tired 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
oh my, you married someone that is immature, guess it's too late to ask why you supported the family for years or why you married him or why you are pregnant again; sounds to me like he has been insensitive throughout your relationship.......you have gotten yourself in a tough spot, let the chores go if you are too tired, quit trying to be in control of everything, use some of your money and hire someone to come in once a week or twice a month.....I'm afraid you are going to find out it isn't going to get any easier being a working mom of two children.
2007-03-15 16:03:50 · answer #1 · answered by abc 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had 3 sons in 5 years, and worked also.
Complaining & begging never worked, but here's what DID!
I told my whole family that I was going on strike, until they took up some slack.. and I put it in WRITING---posted on the fridge.Then I never lifted a finger (except to wash the absolute minimum of clothes---but not hubby's!!) until the house, laundry & dishes were piled sky high, nobody had eaten a decent meal for a couple weeks, none of them could find their keys/shoes/lucky socks/mittens.
It may not help with your young child, but it WILL be a lesson your hub will NEVER EVER forget!
2007-03-15 23:06:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You married a bum, and he will never change. How do I know? Because any man that lets a woman support him is a bum - in any language, under any circumstance, married or not. You know this is true. He has you right where he wants you and he will not lift A FINGER - why should he???
Either get into therapy or start looking for a new place to live, because he'll never leave. I am SO sorry you are caught in this mess. Good luck.
2007-03-15 23:02:17 · answer #3 · answered by Ade 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You arent over reacting. He needs to step up and be a man. U r tired because the baby is draining u, and its time for him to take the wheel.
Tell him to either take it or get out. That he is causing more work than what hes worth and u would be better off not having to clean after his nasty @$$ as well as your 3 year old.
Its not too much to ask and I hope u can get him to understand.
Good luck to u and Congrats on baby! :)
2007-03-15 23:02:22 · answer #4 · answered by Truth Teller 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you are mature and responsible enough to recognize laziness and irresponsibility which is what it sounds like your spouse is exhibiting. I suggest a marriage counselor. My husband has a saying, "Keep doing what you have always done, and you will keep getting what you have always gotten.." Something needs to change and you need his cooperation for that to occur. A third party might be able to help him see this. Good luck to you.
2007-03-15 23:13:50 · answer #5 · answered by curious74432 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it seems like he's your freakin son! well listen, the truth is all of our husbands do the same and he's being a MOMMYS boy...i'm sure his mommy picked up after him all the time and it seems like he's living a single life but living in your house. throw him out...all the way back to his mommys house and tell him to grow up and wake up and move on...because you seem strong enough to deal with your future as hard as you might think it will be
i'm not saying it won't be hard...but trust me...you'll be happy in the long run and much much stronger and less stressed out. it's enough that you have the kids and a career to worry about. and i'm sure you do the billing, organizing, everything...tell him to F offffffff
2007-03-15 23:00:42 · answer #6 · answered by Butterfly 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are not overreacting. You do not deserve to be with soemone like him. I guess that at this point, and he being the father of the coming baby, you do not want to be by yourself. But, honestly, look at you...you are by yourself handling all the sitaution. Sorry, but you do not have a kid and a baby coming, you have "2 kids" at home and a baby coming.
Kick him out, you do not need more stress.
Good luck
2007-03-15 23:03:20 · answer #7 · answered by noooway 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are not over reacting... Tell him everything that is bothering you and if he still doesn't help, kick him out. That may give him the wake up call he needs or at least you will not have the added agravation...
2007-03-15 23:00:12 · answer #8 · answered by kitkat 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
.Well men like to help out but not told what to do . Maybe if you say honey can you help me and take out the garbage so i can cook dinner that may work or not worth a try . Or hit the sucker in the head with a frying pan that may get him off his worthless butt
2007-03-15 23:06:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
You have a 3 yr old. , one on the way, and a 20 yr old child.
He still needs to know that his behavior has consequences.
Time for tough love.
2007-03-15 22:59:56 · answer #10 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋