I have been married for 6 years. over this time our relationship has been rocky at times and good at times. We have gone through a lot relationship wise. The problem is that I am no longer happy or in love with her. She kind of knows something is wrong but i have no idea how to tell her I'm leaving her. How should I do this??? i know it is going to break her heart, but i dont want her to feel worthless. she is a wonderful mother, we just dont have the chemistry anymore and i need to move on with my life. I just dont know how to break this news even after weeks of contemplation.
2007-03-15 11:43:21 · 12 answers · asked by Adolphus 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Dont give up. Work it out. Fall back in love with her. Go on dates, special weekends away, just the two of you. Seriously. Marriage is forever.
2007-03-15 12:52:21 · answer #1 · answered by Kari R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no other way to break the news to her other than to sit her down and gently tell her exactly what you have told us. Just tell her that she is a wonderful mother, a wonderful person, but the two of you have grown apart somehow, changed, you are no longer happy or in love with her and you want to move on with your life. I was in your shoes 2 and a half years ago. I know how you feel. Bite the bullet and tell her. However, I think you should make sure your finances are in order and that you remove any paperwork from the house that is important to you first. She may fly off in to a vengeful rage and try to hurt you financially, kick you out without paperwork or other things you need. Or she might be mature and cooperative. Only you know her and how she might react. It's probably a good idea to go ahead and find a lawyer too.
2007-03-15 11:51:37 · answer #2 · answered by StrawberryShortcake 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
six years is a long time to throw it all away. I think people give up too easy these days and divorce seems like the best situation all the time. I think you should reconsider. first tell how you feel and how long you have been feeling it. Then you guys need to work on it until you find what made you fall in love in the first place. Don't be like everyone else and give up. That's the easy way out and it's the road that everyone takes nowadays.
2007-03-15 11:51:25 · answer #3 · answered by chemicalbrothers13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her the truth, be a man for once in your life. You obviously haven't been a man if you can't be there for your wife through thick and thin. Maybe you should have done something about being in love with her. Love and happiness are both choices. It is not your wife's responsibility to make you happy or to be in love. It's your choice. Quit putting the happiness blame on her since it's your own damn fault. Sorry, no sympathy from me.
2007-03-15 12:06:59 · answer #4 · answered by SillyKimmie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You say "even after weeks of contemplation" .. Try after years of contemplation and still. What stopped me is the fact I have two children, even though they're grown-ups now, i just won't do it for their sake. I always think of how they would feel or react. I'm not discouraging or encouraging you, just make sure your kid or kids are being taking care of.
2007-03-15 11:57:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no easy way to break up. It always hurts. But I think you're a good person because you care about her feelings. I wish happiness to all involved as you make your decision.
2007-03-15 11:48:56 · answer #6 · answered by phantom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You bite the bullet and just say it the same way you'd want to HEAR it if you were on the receiving end. Just assure her that it's NOT about her, that this is something within YOU. No matter how you deliver it, it's gonna hurt.
2007-03-15 12:08:36 · answer #7 · answered by a_lot_smarter_now 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you have a minor child? If so, suck it up. We make our own happiness; maybe you need to try harder. "I need to move on with my life" is one of the most selfish things I've ever read here.
2007-03-15 11:51:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree that people give up too easily... I think you should let her know how you feel and then try counseling... don't give up until you are sure that you've done everything possible to keep your family together.
2007-03-15 12:42:54 · answer #9 · answered by maria_christinag 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to her from your heart... or tell her what you just wrote... that she's a woman and mom... but you just can't seem to find that chemistry between you too anymore... so if she would give you time and space to see where it all went...
2007-03-15 11:51:09 · answer #10 · answered by Wenke_91 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋