HOW DO I TELL MY WIFE THAT I'VE BEEN SEEING ANOTHER WOMAn?

Question

I THINK IT MUST HAVE BEEN A MISTAKE

Answer 1

honesty isnt always the best policy-why hurt her? to relieve your guilt? forget it and get therapy and treat your wife like a queen

Answer 2

Whoa, was seeing the other woman the mistake? Or putting this on Yahoo Questions? If you intend to stop seeing the other woman and intend to get back to being a good husband, don't tell your wife. Put it in the past and never look back. If you are afraid the other woman or someone else will tell her, then you are going to have to tell her that you made a terrible mistake, and that you want to fix your life and be a good husband, employee, father, whatever, from this day forward. Ask her if she wants to know what the mistake is or not, but that you hope she won't ask. Telling her will only cause tremendous pain and she may never trust you again -- a terrible trade off for getting something off your chest. Be prepared to go for counseling if she wants, to be asked to leave the house, whatever.

If you want to keep seeing the other woman, my advice would be to tell the other woman you can't see her for a few months and then tell your wife you want a separation. Don't jump from one woman to another - it's dishonest to both of them. Spend a few months resolving the commitments you made to your wife, who you once loved very much, before you turn to a new person. The other woman should give you time to resolve this situation with the honor and respect your wife deserves. You'll have plenty of time after the divorce to see anyone you want. I hope it works out for you.

Answer 3

Are you still seeing her? If you are, then why would you want to tell your wife? That will only make things more complicated. If you are done with this other woman and your wife has not confronted you then how about going on with your life and not making the same mistake again. And seek professional counseling solo to figure out what reason(s) you had this affair cause if you dont figure it out like the root of it, then it could happen again since you got away with it. Be cool, Dont be a jerk off and continue to abuse your wife. Even though she dosnt know, it is still wrong.

Answer 4

You THINK it must have been a mistake????!!!! The only way you can tell her is to TELL her. I should immediately offer to participate in marriage counseling for you and your wife. This would show some form of good faith. You are going to be eating dog food for a very long time, so get use to that. Learn to grovel! Now the other alternative is to NOT tell your wife and hope the other woman keeps her mouth shut. It's your call and your conscience.

Answer 5

Dont tell her. Why hurt her to easy your guilt? Its bad enough you had that little respect for her to do it in the first place, now you want to tell her to pour salt in the wound? My husband had an affair and i found out cuz i suspected it through a text msg "she" sent him. After weeks of denying it, SHE finally was the one who told me. So with that being said, heres what you need to do. I believe all people make mistakes, I'm not about to judge you for that. But, if you truely LOVE your wife and truely are sorry for what you did to her and truely believe you can keep your thing in your pants in the future and are truely remorseful and there is no way in h*ll she will EVER find out via third party, cut it off with your GF and go on loving your wife the best way you can. Only you know if you really feel like it was a mistake and if you really want your wife and if you'll ever do it again. I hope you dont do that to her. Noone deserves that.

Answer 6

Mike, if I were you I would end the relationship with the other woman but do not tell your wife about your affair. If you tell her it will hurt her terribly and maybe destroy the love and affection she has for you. Why risk it? You don't have to tell her; it is not necessary. What is necessary is for you to end the affair with the other woman totally and completely. No strings..and then I would do everything in my power to make your wife feel loved and respected totally. Yes I think your conscience is bothering you, and you want to relieve yourself of your guilt, but it is a mistake. Just nurture your marriage and start over with love and understanding toward your wife. That is what counts..and your repentance will be reaffirming your committment to your wife...and ending the affair.

Answer 7

Ask your self. Why are you seeing another woman? if you think it is because you think in your subconscious mind that your wife is not a good person or does not deserve you then leave her.
On the other hand if it was just a case of your dick ruling your brain, or if it was a case of mid life crisis then consider your self lucky that you caught yourself in time. Never ever see this woman or any other woman again for that matter. Do not tell your wife about this misadventure and just prey that she never ever finds out!
all the best

Answer 8

If there is absolutely no chance of her finding out then don`t tell her all you would be doing is easing your guilt.
If there is a chance she will find out throw yourself on her mercy. Explain you are totally at fault, it was a mistake , you are sorry and it will never happen again. Be prepared for the fallout. She will not trust you again or at least not for many years . She will be unhappy and make your life hell for months. This is a small price to pay for the heartache you are about to put her through. . Be prepared to reassure her at least ten times a day that you love her and want only her
If you are lucky and she decides to stay with you take all the flak, remember whatever she gives out isn`t half as much as she is suffering through your unfaithfulness.

Answer 9

What was a mistake? The wife or the other woman??

If it was the other woman.....don't tell her. Keep it to yourself and recommit yourself to your wife. There is no reason to tell your wife other than to alieviate your own guilt....and that guilt should be your punishment.

If your wife is the mistake...then tell her in a way that will hurt her the least.

Either way, you're the one with the problem....and your wifes feelings need to be spared at all costs!

Answer 10

Break relations with the 'another woman' immediately. if possible change your place. I think you must tell her honestly and confess your mistake. at the same time promise her not to repeat the same and then KEEP YOUR PROMISE. She must feel that you are keeping your promise. If you have children, spent more time with them. Help her working at home. Make her feel that she is the only one you love and care about. Speak truth, it has an inherent strength. Good luck.

Answer 11

Why would you tell her if it's a mistake? If you want to stay with your wife I'd recommend not telling her and suck up all the guilt I sincerely hope you will feel about it all. If you don't want to stay with her then for god's sake be nice about it, make sure she doesn't feel like it's her fault for picking a cheater or that she's not attractive enough or worthy of a decent man. In other words, humiliate yourself in front of her and tell her you will never be able to make her happy. I hope this helps her.