Sex walk in!?

Question

My 7 year old daughter is really shy and when she talks it is hardly a whisper. Last week I was having sex with her father(my husband) and she came in. Our door opens very quietly and we were on the floor with no blankets, so we continued going all the way. We think she could have stoodthere for up to 30 minutes. I need an excuse, i can't tell her about sex yet, she is too young! I need and excuse, advice, anything, HELP!

Answer 1

Lock your door next time then start teaching your daughter that if the door is closed, she needs to learn to knock & wait for a response. This is just out of politeness. (My parents did this & it stuck w/ me....a good skill to keep well into adult-hood.)

If she's possibly seen as much as you think then you may as well explain it to her now. At that age, you'd be surprised how much a kid knows. Also, kids are learning about sex A LOT younger these days & she'll most likely be learning about that stuff in school in a few years anyway....if not already from friends who are NOT a reliable source. I was in 5th grade & about 9 or 10 years old when they started teaching us the basics of "the birds & the bees". Actually, the sooner she learns from both you & school, the less likely she is to be curious about it (& possibly get herself into trouble) when she's older. Since I learned at 9 or 10, I didn't do anything til I was in my 20s because I knew better. My youngest sister wasn't taught that in school,our parents never talked to her & because of this she ended up losing her virginity at 14 & is now pregnant at 16. (She actually JUST turned 17 when she was 5 months along.) One of my friends has already told her 10 year old daughter everything there is to know about sex just for that reason.....so that she won't be so curious. She also let her know that if she has any other questions that she is free to come to her & ask. I hope you tell her soon so that she doesn't end up asking someone else....that could be interesting. lol. good luck =o)

Answer 2

7 years old is not too young! I'm sure she already has notions as to what was going on. She did not witness any violence, hence she knows you weren't fighting. She didn't hear wild laughter, so she knows it wasn't a circus act. Telling her prefabricated 'white lies' can be detrimental in the long run. She will eventually know you lied and that will lead to a loss of confidence, trust and respect, which can lead to myriad consequences later on. Tell her the truth ( if she asks for an explanation) in a simplistic, child-friendly but non-fantastic manner. She will thank you subconsciously in the future and you will rest at ease knowing she will trust you as a parent and adult...and maybe next time have more care with your bedroom door when you and your husband get the urge.

Answer 3

very calmly ask her if she walked into your room last week without knocking; when she says yes, remind her that it is good manners to knock before opening a closed door, unless there is an emergency. Ask her what she had wanted, and again, remind her that she should knock before entering when the door is closed. If she seems comfortable with talking around what she may have seen, just something like "you look like something is on your mind, was there anything you wanted to ask?" If she asks what you and daddy were doing on the floor, sweetly, calmly, reply that it was private between you and daddy, and that when she is a little older, you'll explain in more detail. And stop right there! If she asks more questions that you don't feel comfortable asking, just say that it was a private grown-up thing, and she doesn't need to know all the details just yet. But above all, remain calm (even though you may be cringing inside!) and answer her questions, even if the answer is "I don't feel you're ready for all the specifics, suffice it to say blah-blah-blah-whatver" that is appropriate for her age. And next time, lock the door!!

Answer 4

Hmm...seven years old. The thing about this is she may know about sex the way it is. I mean, she will not know the details, but in one form or another she may know about it already. And after this, she may know more than you know.

But getting off of that point, you can always tell her that you two were wrestling roman style...lol. Reenacting a play that you two saw. Maybe just give her the old excuse that she will find out when she is older or not until the time is right for her to know. Sure she will have unanswered questions for a while, but in time, things will smooth over and she will forget. I wouldn't worry about it too much unless the subject gets brought up by her.

Answer 5

If this were me, firstly I would tell her that your husband wasn't hurting you, and then I'd tell her that grownups that love each other have special kinds of cuddles. I would tell her that it's nothing to worry about, and when shes older I'll tell her more about it, but for now she should knock before she 'comes into our room cos it's a private thing and moms and dads like to have some time on their own together. I'd tell her that if she has any questions she can always ask me. If she did ask questions, at 7 I'd answer only what she neeeds to know because kids are often satisfied with basic explanations. Don't feel like you need to go into mega detail at this age.

Answer 6

I realize that she is young; however, children are learning earlier and earlier about sex. If she has heard about it already and you lie to her, you could hurt her feeling and she may feel as if she cannot trust you anymore. Tell her the truth - without going into details - and make sure she understands that it is only for grownups.

Also, next time you might want to lock the door to keep this from being repeated. By the way, who was watching her?

Answer 7

Why can't you tell her about sex? She's not too young; you're just embarrassed. Treat it as a fact of life, no different than brushing teeth for dental hygiene, and keep your explanation simple. Kids want to know, but they don't want the depth that parents feel must be expressed. Perfect time to talk about love, making love, making babies, just keep it simple. There are also some child focused sex talk books; just hit the bookstore and see whats available.

Answer 8

Is she too young?? Kids today hear about it from each other and not the ones that they should hear it from !!! You are the parent and by that should be the one she hears it from and not to let hear think and ponder the idea and ask her friends that may lead hear in the wrong way. ask yourself this, is it better that she hears the truth or a lie? be straight forward and honest with her and explain that you are married and that happens only then!! honesty is the best policy in anything. don't lie and let her go find out for her self.

Answer 9

hahahahahaha.....you are among a great many club that has had that to happen..well, ya might as well tell her what was going on, for i am sure she has more questions than a dog has fleas......whats so funny about this, is our 4 year old walked in on us....we were mortified, good luck and keep something on your door as to let you know when she is coming in...like a little bell on the door knob......i disagree with locking your door, but that is me....funny stuff. i do hope you have a great sense of humor, because that's what it is going to take when explaining this one to your little one. be honest....love is a great thing...

Answer 10

hummm - depending on her mental level and maturity, you at the very least have SOME explaining to do. I would begin by telling her that is what two married people who love each other do, and they are supposed to do it in private - apoligize to your daughter for leaving the door unlocked. I do, however, find it hard to believe she stood there for 30 minutes and you did not notice her.