Homosexual relationships are extremely common in this day and age, and there are many gays and lesbians who take pride in who they are. There are, however, also some gays and lesbians who are not exactly proud of their lifestlye and choose to abandon and/or avoid this particular way of life due to religous reasons, familial pressure, etc. For those of you who choose to live homosexual (or even heterosexual) lifestlyes, what do you think of these types of individuals? Do you feel that they are cowardly sell-outs just looking to gain acceptance from the heterosexual counterparts? Do you think it's just a matter of them being in denial and/or a state of confusion? Or, do you simply respect their decision(s) to stray away from the lifestyle all together?
Serious and mature answers are greaty desired. Thanks!
2007-03-15 07:36:00 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Great question:-) For me personally, it's a mix of both. I do feel as if these people are very ashamed of who they are and because of this, choose to deny themselves the right to happiness. And it's very sad. I went through this phase for about one year, and after the torture & stress of leading a double life, i couldn't do it anymore. I had to come out and be true to who i really am. BUT...i am fully able to understand that some are too fearful to take such a stance & i remain to have respect for them in general. I will never disrespect someone only because they have differing views from me.
2007-03-15 07:47:39 · answer #1 · answered by Raynebow_Diva 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I had to think awhile before answearing this one.
Honestly no; could they be confused about who they truly are maybe. Then again they could be staying away from the "scene" until they fill comfortable to come forward with who they are. I have a friend, who is gay by definition and actions but refuses to call himself either homo or hetro sexual. I can understand the pressures from family, and religous people
Its like asking what do you do with the GLBTs that do not support same sex marriages?
Also, has a side not, I dont think same sex relationship are more common place but just more obvious then they have been in previous years(decades and even centuries)
2007-03-15 15:09:17 · answer #2 · answered by Prometheus Cowboy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have been in a relationship with a woman who left me due to the pressure from her family. It sucks, and it's sad that she doesn't have the strength or autonomy to be who she is and live her own life. But the fact of the matter is, you can't be mad at people for how they choose to live their lives. Yes, maybe we are affected when they make these decisions, but ultimately, they are the ones suffering for it. They feel like they are better off where they are, so you have to respect their decision, even if you disagree.
2007-03-15 14:40:53 · answer #3 · answered by jjspike 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not because they are sellouts. It's because society makes it very hard for homosexuals to be who they are. All of this talk about how being gay is becoming mainstream is a bunch of crap. Maybe for Rosie O'Donnell and Ellen DeGeneres but not for Joe, I'm gay, who lives down the street. I wish people would leave others alone and worry about their own **** before they go and judge others.
2007-03-15 14:45:58 · answer #4 · answered by Mrs. Bates 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
it depends on their reason for keeping their sexual orienation a secret. I've had people come up to me and tell me that I need to go to a church and get "saved" This girl was telling me how she's an ex-gay and how I need to do the same so I can be accepted by Jesus. I began to tell her that you can be gay and a christian at the same time. She told me that gays are possessed by the devil and only think that they are in love with people of the same sex because the devil wants them to sin and become slaves in hell. It didn't make any sense to me why God would hate gays for loving but praise heteros for changing people. I wasn't mad with her, it just made me sad to think about the kind of lies the church will tell you.
If a person decides not to tell anyone about his/her sexual orienation because they know their family/friends will not understand them, then I wouldn't think of them as a sell-out. If you know that your secret is going to cause problems between you and your family, then the best choice would be not to tell them, but dont go around lying to yourself and laughing along with others when they say homohobic things. If someone is gay and they go around gay bashing others just to prove that they are straight, then of course I'm going to get mad. But if they are keeping their life a secret from certain family members (but dont try to change who they are)then I respect that.
when your parents hate you for being gay, that's one thing. But when closeted gays call you a f*g, that's what hurts that most.
2007-03-15 15:00:42 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes and no.
First off, I don't believe being gay/lesbian is a "style of life." Not at all. It's simply a part of who I am, a part of the whole package.
I can't choose to "BE" straight anymore than I can choose the color of my hair the grows from my head. It's just part of who I am.
Sure, I could "Choose" to color it or wear a wig, but I don't choose to do so..nor would it change anything. I'm still a gay human being with hair that's naturally brown.
2007-03-15 14:46:15 · answer #6 · answered by DEATH 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
One of the best parts of being gay is to be able to accept who you are. Plus we are more open minded to others and their lifestyles. If these people choose to ignore or disregard who they are in lieu of living basically a lie. That is their choice. I don't condone nor condemn them. I'm not them and I certainly will not judge them.
2007-03-15 14:59:02 · answer #7 · answered by ron s 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Is self protection a sell out? I'm sort of in the closet but not from my family but from the gay community. I vote mostly republican, don't believe in the whole marriage nonsense, didn't mind the don't ask don't tell policy while I was in the military. Who yelled and called me names? Members of the "community". So I don't go around trumpeting my sexual orientation...big deal. I am who I am and I'm happy.
2007-03-15 15:25:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hmmmm, can someone be a sellout to their own life? I think that they are living their life the way that they want to live it. It is wrong for you to judge them as being a sellout because it might not be the way that you would live your life. At the end of the day we each are responsible for ourselves and the decisions that we have made.
2007-03-15 15:02:46 · answer #9 · answered by J J 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
it's really none of my business to care about what others chose to do with their personal lives. being gay or being straight is something we are born with. it's not an award we have earned. it doesn't mean we are part of any team nor does it mean we have any sort of societal obligation to act in a certain way and/or brag about our sexuality or sexual orientation.
if gay people chose to date and/or marry someone of the opposite sex for whatever reason, then i would honestly question their gayness. sounds like they are actually bi.
2007-03-15 15:25:59 · answer #10 · answered by Jeff 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋