Ok, So I met this guy when I was about 17 yrs old. He was friends with my older sister, and he was about 26 at the time, a married entrepreneur. He took me out for fantsy sushi dinners,and spoiled me by taking me to exotic places. I thought it was all fun and games until I became pregnant. He did all the right things, divorced, bought us a house, etc. But even at this time I wasn’t even 21 yet. He came and went as he pleased. I dedicated myself to him and my fam I even wrked for him for free. He never would let me access any money without asking him, (hed always give it) he didn’t want me working, and seemed very controlling. I continued to work 40+hours a week for him for free for 4 yrs.
I ended up finding him talking to girls on the internet, we got over that.
I helped him quite using drugs, and partying, I got over that. I even caught him talking to girls at a Club we both worked at, completely inappropriately.
2007-03-15 07:05:53 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
PRT2
He promised to stop. He would stay out all night all the time, come and go as he pleased. He would use the excuse that he needed to “blow off steam”. We fought a lot in the beginning and I just quite caring. After a while all the “inloveness” I had for him faded away. I ended up leaving, getting my own job that pays me, and stayed with my parents for a couple week I was strong, in the doubtfulness of him taking everything. Actually being happy to not have to answer to someone all day and all night. I start talking to a close friend. And now developing some feelings for him. Then out of no where my boyfriend of 4 years proposes to me and promises to make everything better. He has fulfilled all of his promises to me and is "completely in love with me", like I once was for him. I just no longer have those feelings and done know how to leave. I know he will take all our money and items, but I cant force myself to love him and marry him.
2007-03-15 07:15:00 · update #1
I sort of developed feelings for a friend that has been there for me throughout this and I would never cheat, but I also would feel guilty to leave him for another person. What makes it even worse now is how great my boyfriend is being toward me.
2007-03-15 07:20:10 · update #2
Follow your heart and not his pocketbook. You did that once and see where it got you? If you can not love him as much as he loves you do HIM a favor and let him know it will not work.
Don't put yourself through what you have already done, again. Enjoy your life and one day someone you can fall in love with and who will love you will come along.
Good Luck!!
2007-03-15 07:22:06 · answer #1 · answered by Mee-Maw 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, your stupid for dating a married man. I bet he's been cheating behind your back all these years and possibly getting another girl pregnant. How could you trust a man like this? And you've been working for him for free? I dont know if I even want to read part 2 but here is my answer to your question: Should I stay or should I go?
Should you stay? Yes, because you seem very dependent on him. The fact that you have no problem working for him for free all these years and also the fact that he talks to other girls. You are denial about he's cheating and have learned to ignore it all these years. If you can get used to it than you will have continue with his controlling, selfish behavior.
Should you go? Yes, but you have to understand that you have to start your life all over again. You will need to find your own job, your own place to stay, pay bills, etc etc. Its a scary world out there but you can do it. You can get out this horrible relationship and be Miss Independent. Its not easy but it is worth it.
Feel free to email me with more questions.
2007-03-15 07:18:00 · answer #2 · answered by TroubleRose 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well all I can say is your dumb for having been with him in the first place. What any man can do to one woman, he can do to another. He's not going to "quit" doing anything for you. You said you helped him "quit" so many things. How is that so, obviously his way of life hasn't changed, look how he treated his first wife and look how he's treating you.
If you're asking yourself the should I stay, or should I go, then obviously you know the answer to your own question.
I would go. Screw it, it's not even worth it. If he loved you, he wouldn't treat you that way, or do, or have done those things behind your back. And if he didn't want to get caught, he wouldn't have let you catch him.
And if you hadn't supsected something, because you were once the mistress, you would have never caught him, so obviously neither one of you are truly happy.
Leave.
2007-03-15 07:11:51 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you took the right step, in gaining back your Independence and freedom. Now get the guts to say no more, I deserve the best, and if you research within yourself you know that its true. Just be brave enough to say no I have moved on, and you should too. He will try to break you down, promise you the moon, the world anything that will make you happy. Just look at your children, they are your moon, your world,and everything.Nothing else can make you as happy as them.
2007-03-15 07:30:01 · answer #4 · answered by lennie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what makes you think that he will be faithful to you, if he wasn't faithful to his first wife, no matter what excuses he used at the time for cheating, there are two sides to every story, and what he said about her to you, he could be saying about you to others, i don't understand if you had a child together or not, but what kind of influence could a cheating, ex-drug addict have on your child.
i don't mean to be rude or inconsiderate but you are either not using your head, or your are enjoying being the victim, and if you have a child then i suggest you think twice about what image you are projecting.
you are obviously worth allot more, then he deserves, just remember once a cheater always a cheater
2007-03-15 07:22:27 · answer #5 · answered by injie w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is up to you. Can you put up with him?
2007-03-15 07:09:29 · answer #6 · answered by Kimora Miranda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋