Is it "REALLY" okay to cry?

Question

People say it is. Are they lying? I don't think it's particularly "cool" to cry. Damn spilt milk.....sniff.....

Answer 1

Really, really. I am a 40---er something year old man. I don't exactly bawl all over the place when my favorite singer gets booted off American Idol. But there are issues in life that demand that we deal with them on an emotional level. Meaning that some strong feeling inside of us begins to demand to be heard. Whether tears or simple sadness or great laughter that comes from deep within and annoys the people four tables over in the food mall. I have felt the strong need to hug a grown man or woman to comfort them in a terrible time. Yet I had to fight with my upbringing to never show emotion or ever touch other people in public. I felt like I was going to break as I did it and that everyone was going to think I was some sort of weirdo or pervert. But that wasn't ME! That was an incorrect upbringing! It wasn't the ME that was wrong or strange! It was those voices that were telling me that being simply honest and open with those people that I cared for....they were wrong!
If you feel like crying, cry. Go into private at first if you have to, but eventually take a risk and allow someone else to share your pain and hurt.
I have a very painful arthritis. I was involved in a rock climbing accident some years ago and received head injuries and other physical injuries. It ended my career which I got up bright eyed every morning with joy to go in to do. It dramatically changed my relationship with my wife and children (I didn't know who they were for some time and then it was years before I actually 'felt' like part of the family again). We still struggle. It is a great day when I don't have horrible headaches and can do a load of dishes in the auto washer..we both smile and talk and really enjoy those days. But there are days I feel nothing for her. I know that it is a part of my brain that was damaged and I remember how wonderful our relationship always was, but it isn't always that way now. But after 24 years she still is with me and after 14 year after the accident she still stands by me. That makes me cry. I don't deserve her. I don't deserve my children and their patience. My son taught me to read again. His dad had a MS in Physics and he had the patience at 10 years old to slowly work through the words of his comics and show me how the pictures made sense with the words for months until I became cogent again in English (I never did get the 7 other languages back except for odd phrases at inappropriate times). My little cuddly bear girl that I didn't know and felt nothing for would cuddle up on my lap in the evenings and love me unconditionally. That made me cry. It still does.
Yeah. It's OK to cry. People who don't think so just have emotional issues that they can't deal with or are afraid of judgment from others. But everyone hurts in some way. You'd never know it in most. Most would probably never know you hurt sometimes. But it is OK for you to be the person that your inner ME is calling out to be. It is what Abraham Maslov called 'Becoming'.

Answer 2

No they aren't lying. Obviously lots of things aren't particularly "cool" but it doesn't mean it's not okay. Everyone gets sad and by not crying when you're really upset and feel like you need to cry, can make things worse and that can be unhealthy.

Answer 3

Better than merely OK, it's healty, healing, and good.

It's bad for people to prevent themselves from crying -- which is why I sincerely hope people stop teaching their boys to stifle.

When you are hurt, it's important to express and release it.

It's not about changing things -- in the sense of undoing whatever it was. Of course it doesn't unspill the milk (notice how that expression trivalizes this essential thing, telling everyone who cries that there's something wrong with them -- ugly).

Keeping it in does damage.

Not good.

Damage bad.

It cuts one off from all feelings. By stifling, people make it so they don't know themselves, don't know what they're feeling, don't recognize (and therefore seek to fulfill) their emotional needs, and even their joy.

It leads to their trivializing the pain of others, which is very hurtful.

Makes them less human.

That's never good.

Answer 4

a very real fact approximately capability there. i become raised in an abusive kinfolk and we weren't allowed to cry. We have been continuously informed that if we saved crying we'd receive something to cry approximately. properly, If we only have been given our butt beat we already had something to cry approximately. We had to end or face yet another beating. I found out to grind my tooth to internalize my emotions. I nonetheless do it to on the present time and that i'm 40. i did no longer even realize it till i become clinically determined with TMJ and chewed by using my splint in a month and a nil.5. I nonetheless, to on the present time, have a difficulty with others seeing me convey emotion. there is no longer something incorrect with crying in any respect. It lowers your blood rigidity once you're under pressure.

Answer 5

I have had problems with this for much of my own life. When I was a child, my mother used to physically punish me for crying. She would say something like "If you're going to cry, I'll give you a REASON." Somehow it never occurred to her that I ALREADY HAD a reason, or I wouldn't have risked arousing her anger by crying in the first place!
Then, when I grew up and married, I found that tears, no matter how awful the circumstances that inspired them, sent my late husband into ice-cold anger, too. (Yet I'd seen him show concern-for and comfort to others when they cried!) There were times when I almost wished there were some way I could safely have a doctor remove my tear glands!

Yet, through it all, common sense and basic reason kept telling me that it was THEIR wrong, and not MINE.
Crying is a natural response to grief and sorrow of any kind - sometimes it is even a natural response to intense happiness - and when natural responses are stifled, bad things happen. Crying is nature's way of allowing us to vent our pains and sorrows so their negativity doesn't build up inside of us and cause all manner of stress and stress-related problems and diseases in our lives.
When a negative pollutant gets into your physical envirnment (like dirt on your kitchen floor or spoiled food in your fridge) you immediately throw or sweep it outside. You DON'T keep it inside and just let it keep building up and getting worse and worse. Yet, we think it is correct and proper to do this with our griefs and sorrows.
Others may not consider it "cool" (GOD! How I HATE that word!!!) or socially desirable, but I believe it is necessary - even ESSENTIAL - to maintaining a strong mental, emotional and even in some cases, physical state of well-being.

Answer 6

Of course it's okay to cry? It makes me feel good to cry. I can cry from hearing about sad things that happen to people. Seeing those guys leaving for Iraq, because they have no idea what's really ahead of them. They're hugging and kissing their wives and girl friends goodbye. It makes me tearful. And to see them return to their families. There are all kinds of things to cry about. Cry over a tragedy, a good movie. Making a mistake. It means you have a big heart and a good heart. What could be wrong with that? Nothing at all.

Answer 7

it does depend on what your crying over if you lost all your family in a fire i don;t think i would poke fun at you for crying it has to hurt@
but if your crying over something stupid then maybe i will
Then again i am female i get emotional and cry for no reason some times i just say my tear ducks need washing but i try to do this in the privacy of my own home! i guess it's better to cry then to go crazy with pms!

Answer 8

Yes it is. I mean, you don't have to sit there all day, every day and cry over everything, but if ever there is a moment that you feel like crying, instead of maybe, getting angry, do it! There is no harm in it, and it doesn't have to be a public display either if you aren't comfortable with it.

Answer 9

It's ok for men to cry. In fact, some see it as a sense of strength. Sure, you shouldn't cry every time the glass tips, but every once in a while, it can be a great sense of stress relief for the brain.

Answer 10

It's a healthy way to express emotions. It's a healthy choice compared to what other people do. (suppress it, ignore it, or something dangerous)

One of my most hated expressions is "Don't cry or I'll give you something to really cry about"

Will then you wouldn't be crying in the first place, thank you very much!

DO Not let anyone suppress you no matter who they are.

Be proud of yourself. Trust me, It will help alot in life.