So I have always been in drama filled, cheating, jealous and mistrusting relationships. Finally I decided to get out of them I took a 6 month break and then met my neighbour who I was eyeing for the past while. It was a Tuesday when we 1st introduced ourselves to each other and now 6 months later we've spent every night/waking minute with each other. Honestly, I think we have missed 2 nights for flu/cold reasons.
So what I am asking is I feel as though something is missing in this relationship. I dont feel as though my love for him is as strong as it was for my ex. I finally trust him which is a great thing but I interpret that if I trust him I just must not care about him and what he does behind my back. I know he is 100% faithful and I sat on the couch yesterday thinking about the things that I dont like about him and all I could think of was "he is too nice?" I know it sounds ridiculous and stupid. But I feel as though "I know" my love for him is going to die for some reason or another.
I finally have this guy who is trustworthy, genuine, appreciative, attentive, affectionate, loveable, hot, great job, beautfil house etc etc.....so why do I feel as though something is missing?!?! It doesn;t make any sense....
For the first 3 months of our relationship I didnt feel like this at all. I was happy as ever and I cant figure out what could have changed my feelings so fast. I am still attracted to him, still like spending time with him, still enjoy doing nice things for him etc but something is wrong.....Anyone have any suggestions? Thanks so much!
I was thinking it could possibly be caused from the amount of drama that I used to enjoy for some odd reason. In the beginning of our relationship the newness of it was "my drama" and now I dont want to mistake the lack of drama to a lack of love.....but how can I tell...Any suggestions?
2007-03-15 05:18:26 · 16 answers · asked by dawson190154 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You are used to drama, so when a nice guy comes along, "safe" isn't as exciting as "drama"...
I feel for you, as I am a Drama Queen, as my family is a little "off the charts" when it comes to drama, and I always dated men who were awful for and to me...
So, here comes the advice...I have been married for nine years to a safe, stable, wonderful guy...
You can watch drama-filled movies, try exciting activities, travel and do exciting things, have all kinds of adventures...
you will have "safe stable guy" to come home to!!!
GOOD LUCK
2007-03-15 05:25:54 · answer #1 · answered by jgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, maybe you have put up a wall so you feel safe.....because something this good can;t be true, right?
In my experience....The first cut is the deepest. If you were ever really truly in love with the last one, it is hard to ever get that feeling again.
I have been married for 4 years now....and their is still a bit of a "Ghost" in my house. As much as I love and respect my husband....it is just not the kind of love I had with my first love. It is better in almost all the ways it should be....but it is hard to let go of "what could have been".....
2007-03-15 12:24:30 · answer #2 · answered by Wild seed 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are absolutely correct. You are missing the drama. But the drama does not make for a good relationship. Stay with this man--and seek counseling for yourself. You have a self-destructive pattern. I'm telling you this because I have been through this exact thing. I'm married 12 years to the "nice" man, and I couldn't be more in love--but I was crazy to think I needed drama years ago. Counseling helped me see that I have issues and needed to work through them.
2007-03-15 12:31:35 · answer #3 · answered by Audrey C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The love will grow. You love him now, maybe just not to the full potential. Trust me the longer you are with him the more ur love will grow. The past has ALOT to do with ur present so what happend to u in the past I'm sure has affected u some. All of those feelings will go away and soon u will wonder how you ever didn't love him more.
2007-03-15 12:31:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look after getting out of a horrible relationship you often feel like crap, that something your missing is baic trust. you want to trust someone eough so that they can love you and you can love them without the cheating, the drama, and the mess that carried over from the previous relationship.
You just need to open your heart and trust with all your hear t so you can get a brand new start at loving someone.
2007-03-15 12:23:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, it sounds like you have found a great guy. I think that if you are feeling this way you should talk to him about it. One thing that makes relationships last is communication. Maybe doing something different to keep it exciting, like going on a trip or for a walk together. Basically what I am saying is instead of fighting as a way to keep this exciting, maybe you can do some exciting things.
2007-03-15 12:24:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your time. You noticed a lack in drama, and so this is a good time to think if this is love or infatuation. Make the right call now so that you don't regret it later.
2007-03-15 12:23:52 · answer #7 · answered by squeezy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Crazy. You need to just think about how you REALLY want to live your life. Do you want someone that you know will always be there and never let you be harmed, or do you want someone who is going to possibly beat you, torment you mentally, cheat on you, lie to you, break your heart, etc... COME ON WOMEN! if you find a nice guy, appreciate it. There REALLY aren't that many out there...
2007-03-15 12:29:31 · answer #8 · answered by agkwatson@sbcglobal.net 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know wat you feel lik i feel the same way wit my bf even though myself and other bf broke up 19months ago i no tat if i was givin another chance i would get back with him and i feel terrible for it but its just how my feelings go i care about my current bf so much bt i dont feel the big spark tat i felt wit my other bf so i guess all tats left to say is we should both hold in there for a while and see wat comes out of it ya never know it could be the love of ur life so best of luck...........to both of us eh.
2007-03-15 12:30:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know what i felt the same way w/ my ex. i was sooo confused. i made the wrong mistake. i chose the ex. follow ur heart!
2007-03-15 12:23:26 · answer #10 · answered by HOTTIE 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋