I have been with my bf for almost 3 years we really do love each other but we have been having problems lately & we are both 2 the point where we dont know what 2 do next he has proposed 2 me 3 times & then we get in to it & he tells me we need time to think about our relationship & weigh the options after that we get back together & now we are trying 2 make a decision if we should get counciling or if we should go our seperate ways we fuss over stupid things like him having female friends from high school & i dont think its a wise choice can u help me.
2007-03-15 05:10:34 · 12 answers · asked by CUTIE85 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Counseling, that is the best thing. That way you both know what is wrong with the relationship. It is always nice to talk to someone outside of the relationship than amongst yourselves. Just remember every relationship is going to have there ups & downs, if you both love one another then don't give up. Go to counseling and if that doesn't work then maybe you too should then consider just being friends and moving on. Good Luck to you both.
2007-03-15 05:16:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just calm down, give yourself time...
Think what do you want. Try to understand him and his actions. This is all about be for each others needs and patience. Relationship is work.
The most important thing is if you really love him or not. This is what you should understand about yourself before get married. Why did he propose 3 times? Did you have doubts???
Because if you do not really love him, relationship or marriage will became like only a hard, sad work, without any happiness. Which will destroy you and your life.
2007-03-15 12:23:38 · answer #2 · answered by Bella 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If youre both committed to the relationship and want it to work out then try counciling. Relationships and marriage takes work theres always going to be ups and downs. If one of you isnt committed then you have no choice but to go your seperate ways. Theres nothing wrong with men or women having friends of the other sex. If you want that much control over him to pick his friends it wont work. If he tried to pick your friends you wouldnt like it either. Just because his friend is female doesnt mean their going to have sex.
2007-03-15 12:19:47 · answer #3 · answered by letthepartybeginnow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm this is a tricky one. i was with my boyf for four years when we came to a point like yours, we had just been living with each other for 8months, think that had something to do with it to so i decided the best thing to do was to move out, which i did then didn't speak or see him for two months when we seen each other again it was abit emotional but things soon went back to the way they were, i didn't want that so we went another three months without talking or seeing each other, it was hard but good at the same time cause it gave us time and space to do what we wanted to do without someone wanting to know where your going and what your doing all the time, now we are back together again and things seem to be differant this time, we both grew and did what we wanted to do and realised what we did wrong but in our time apart i decided to book a ticket away for the summer so this will really test us, but as the saying goes whats for you wont pass you.
2007-03-15 12:20:07 · answer #4 · answered by shorty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know the answer. Yes you should seek premarital counseling. Everyone truly should before getting married. If you are having problems now, then that just emphasizes the importance. If you both belong to a church then talk to your pastor, most churches have premarital counseling that is based in mutual spiritual beliefs. If not or if your religious beliefs differ then look into your local counseling centers and find someone that specializes in marital or premarital counseling.
2007-03-15 12:19:12 · answer #5 · answered by krissy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The things you "fuss" about our real issues, if you really love him you should consider counseling; if you want to move on which I personally suggest because this man really doesnt love you because if he did he would have talked to you and took the proposals serious and dropped his female friends and devote his time and his life for you.
2007-03-15 12:16:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you 2 need to "seperate" for a while.... not saying you should date other people, but to get to know yourselves as individuals and not as a couple. Give it some time and then if you decide that your both in "different" places then I suggest you break it off and discover yourselves.
2007-03-15 12:21:58 · answer #7 · answered by stoutunicorn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, don't be so much the jealous type. If he's asked you to marry him 3 times, don't worry about him cheating on you. High school friends are high school friends, he will never replace you with them. 3 years is 3 years, if that ain't love, then i dont know what is.
2007-03-15 12:20:03 · answer #8 · answered by Joey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is happening between both you is very normal for a couple who has not found a common theme for being together. You enjoy fights more than love; you enjoy finding fault with each other more than loving him/her. You look at his weak points and highlight it always. You both need to be mature!! Love is understanding, forgioving and enjoying each others company. If you have lost that, please separate.
2007-03-15 12:16:55 · answer #9 · answered by AdultMale 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that you 2 need to go 2 counseling you never know my parents got married and then they fell apart but they managed to hang in there for me and my 2 brothers they tried counseling and it worked they still have problems but they have been married 4 12 years now so i think that you should try counseling experience
2007-03-15 12:18:44 · answer #10 · answered by girlsrulejenna 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋