Any communication between me and my daughters father turns into a fight between me and my finance... we've been together for three years. Is there a way of getting over this? He has a problem with me and their father being on the same field to watch them play sports. Is this normal with blended families? My two girls love my finace very much and I also have a son with him ... need advise and thanks!
2007-03-15 05:02:27 · 7 answers · asked by Christina B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
maybe he is jealous because you don't show him (enough) how much you love him and care for him? think about this for a moment. you have to reasure him ALL THE TIME he is the one you are in love with and if you already have a kid with him and will marry him soon, you better change your life style. if you are friends with your ex, then cut that and just communicate through your daughters I think this is the best way to keep everybody happy. I know, it might sound selfish but it will save you lots of drama later on. if your daughters have a game or something that requires your presence, take turns with your ex to attend these events. why play happy family with your ex and your kids if you two are divorced?
2007-03-15 06:59:49 · answer #1 · answered by chikis 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have a blended family and I see my wifes ex every other day. There are times I come home and he is drinking MY beer at my kitchen table. I rationalize not getting pis.sed off by truly being happy that my step has his father in his life. We coached my steps soccer team together. I dont know why anyone would not want a peaceful situation if it were possible. Tell you husband that you love HIM not your ex. Thats why he is an EX. It seems like a bit of jealousy to me.
You should be more angry then your hubby after all you were married to the ex he wasnt. Tell him to just get over it already.
2007-03-15 05:12:18 · answer #2 · answered by Devdude 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your fiance needs to understand that you share children with this man, and that will ALWAYS be a link between you two. There is no getting around it, so eventually he's just going to have to deal with it. You need to make him understand that you don't have a choice in keeping the window of communication open with your ex, and that there is no point in being obstructive. If he cares for you and your daughters he must understand that your daughters need their father...
Further, it's insecure of your fiance to be so opposed to your ex...I think you need to spend some time nurturing his wounded ego...
2007-03-15 05:11:49 · answer #3 · answered by Andrea M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to understand that you are with him and you're not with your daughter's father for a reason. He needs to understand that as long as their father wants to be around, he will be part of your life. You cant deprive them of being around their father and it's not fair that he's giving you a hard time about it. Im sure he wouldnt be okay with having another man not letting him be okay with his son one day. He has no say so in this situation. He needs to be understanding. Seems like he's a lil insecure. im sorry to hear about your situation. I can see where this can be stressful for you.
2007-03-15 05:16:17 · answer #4 · answered by Yankees Fan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have exactly the same problem with my fiance. I see it as pure jealousy. He believes incorrectly that if anything goes wrong with us the ex would be right back in the picture, I say hes my ex for some darn good reasons but that doesnt help matters at all.
2007-03-15 05:07:35 · answer #5 · answered by sugar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All contact between the two should be avoided as much as possible. You would think if this man loves you that he would refrain from any personal attacks to your X in respect for you and the children. It's okay that he hates your X, it is NOT okay that he makes for a hostile enviornment for you, your X and children.
2007-03-15 06:02:28 · answer #6 · answered by MJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is jealous of the history that you had with your x.....he needs to know that you divorced him for a reason. and to make this relationship work, he needs to calm down. you need to tell him that you do not desire any emotional or physical relationship with your x. He needs to get along for your daughters sake, she will eventually pick up on it, and resent him for it and you as well. I commend your x for showing up for games to watch your child.....so many fathers don't after a divorce. It is a real positive thing.....but your BF has got to get over this.
2007-03-15 05:12:36 · answer #7 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋