Is this postpartum depression?

Question

My son is 4 months old and my parents watch him while I'm at work. Since the day he was born, I don't like anyone else to hold him and I only recently started supplementing nursing with formula because I feel very jealous when anyone else feeds him. I can only recently share the time I spend with him with my husband without feeling resentment. I don't like working anymore because all I can think of is my son and worrying that he is okay and not crying, and I'm exhausted because I don't want to miss seeing him when he wakes up at night so I don't ask anyone else to help me. Recently my father and I are butting heads about my work schedule, and now I just want to quit so I can keep him with me. I just want to cry all the time when we are apart. I know this isn't healthy for me or my son, but I can't figure out what to do. Has anyone else been thru this and if so, what should I do?

Answer 1

I dont know if its your instinct to protect your child or postpartum. I had postpartum and I cried all the time, didnt think I was good enough for my child, felt like everything I was doing was wrong, felt like everyone was attacking me and felt so alone. Talk to your OB or even your family dr to find out what your experiancing is ppd. I had it but didnt feelt he way you do. I will be honest though I didnt want ppl holding my son, I didnt want ppl feeding my son or changing him and I didnt trust his own father with him! And to this day he's 10 months old and I am no longer on medication for ppd I still dont like ppl changing him feeding him or putting him down at night for bed because "no one does it like mommy"

Answer 2

It sounds like you have a couple of issues. First of all, I think there is some ppd going on. Second, it sounds like you have a lot of guilt over your current schedule. You may want to use a two-pronged approach. First of all, I would speak to either your OB/GYN or your family dr about your feelings. You need to be very honest and see if they reccomend medication. Second, can you rearrange your schedule? Do you want to be a sahm? Or maybe you could look into working part-time? If you cannot work part-time at your present job, is there a job you could do and work part-time?

Also, you said he's 4 months old. How long have you been back at work? If it has only been a couple of weeks, maybe giving it some time will help. I know I was a mess when I went back to work with my dd. After a couple of weeks, I was much better.

Answer 3

I wouldn't classify that is PPD. I was a sufferer of PPD for many months after my baby was born, and the feelings that the depression bring on are not like that at all. You feel anxious over your parenting skills, crying triggers anxiety, you generally feel down. Sometimes severe PPD causes people to feel like they want to actually harm their infant. What you have is a separation anxiety on the parent's end. While I do not think that you have depression by any means, I do suggest you consult someone to at the very least talk things out because if it gets too much, you can isolate people and cause problems in your marriage, esp. if your husband is only trying to help. You will not perform your job as well because your mind is elsewhere. You will NOT help your baby by having him witness two parents fighting and being unemployed, so again, I suggest you talk it out with someone qualified, preferred. There might be an underlying issue, or an overzealous protective instinct. In any case, as I mentioned before, while it is not PPD, it can get out of hand and cause problems. Plus, it can stress the child out as they get older because you'd isolate them and put unnecessary stress in their lives. Maybe you are this way because you like the child to always need YOU. A professional can help you sort things out. I suggest you do this sooner rather than later, esp. if your job has an employee assistant program.

ETA: whoever votes THIS down is an idiot, sorry. I should know what the difference is between PPD and something else, and either/or, they require some sort of counseling - be it a family member, etc. - if it interferes with your relationships and your job. Period.

Answer 4

My son is 2 years old. I had to take him to daycare because I don't have family living close enough to me to watch him. I feel like you are just insanely worried about his well-being; overly tired from not asking for help, and trying to hold down a job as well. Post partum depression symptoms -to me- would be more to the tune of please take this screaming baby away from me; I wish he would have never been born, all to the tune of depression. I personally would (if my husband made enough money to allow it) stay at home with my son. You could start working again when he's maybe 2. This would give you the time you need to spend with your son: bonding, feeding, loving - without anyone else getting in your way. Nap when he does. This will help you with the under-slept portion. Also, by staying home, I think you will find that you feel like you have had enough time with him to yourself and make you feel more comfortable with giving him daddy time. You wouldn't have to butt heads with your dad b/c you wouldn't have a work schedule. Hope this helps!

Answer 5

Yeah, it sounds like to me that you have some post-partum depression. Those are classic symptoms. You're having some really unrealistic fears about your baby and you are being way too hard on yourself. Get some help. It's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel from where you are, but this can and WILL end. Chances are you've been feeling this way for so long now, it doesn't seem like it will ever end. But go to the doctor and see if they can help you - this is definitely post partum depression.

Answer 6

Reecpeec mentioned all of it. =) i think of it is in all probability somewhat of the two. That Robin is crushed and is partly depressed b/c she feels inadequate and that the toddler in all probability does experience that and it must be making her uncomfortable round her mommy. yet, such as you mentioned, there are a number of motives for postpartum melancholy, and countless different warning signs, so with a bit of luck that writers will circulate into that besides, as a replace of attempting to make us have self assurance that Robin is depressed b/c her toddler won't supply up crying. to no longer sound sexist, even in spite of the shown fact that it is so glaring that replaced into written by a guy.

Answer 7

It does sound like post-partum. I would talk to your OB/GYN about it. I never experienced these type feelings, but I think everyone has their own "issues" after giving birth. After my twins were born, I was terrified for my husband to return to work. I was worried about being alone with the babies. It passed for me rather fast...but everyone is different. If your son is 4 months old I would definitely talk to your doctor about your feelings.

Answer 8

You are just missing your son! Just relax, you are working so he can have a better life, with nice things. I'm sure your parents are watching him just fine. They raised you and your still here.Your lucky they are able to watch him, you would be even more stressed if a stranger was watching him! It's perfectly normal to miss your son , he's still brand new! But I would talk to your doctor, zoloft did wonders for me. Good Luck and congrats on the new baby!

Answer 9

not post partum i personally had post pardum with all three of my children this isnt it. with post pardum you feel almost the exact oppisite. i felt like . . . well the best way to describe it would be babysitting . it was worst with my oldest. i wanted to work i wanted breaks from him. but i felt guilty for feeling that way . so i didnt tell anyone. i cried all the time over everything, because of the ppl who would tell me OMG how can you not love your baby. i told my mother with the second and she took me to see someone professionally. it was a chemical imbalance he gave me medicine and it worked .

what you have is not post pardum but non the less could be just as harmful to your baby. your baby need social contact, other than you. keep in mind where you want to be the only one capable of taking care you your baby. your mother and father raised you i think they may be able to handle your baby. let your husband do as much as he wants holding the baby from him will work horror stories on their relationship and on your marrage.

Answer 10

I would say that this is definitely worth talking to your doctor about. Only a doctor can diagnose conditions like depression. However, your anxiety and irrational feelings are consistent with my experience in this field which is extensive.

Please note that I said that your feelings are irrational. It is clear that you are rational, because you recognize it. There are things that can be done to help you. Just talk to your doctor.