My husband and I are joint owners of our house but the bank called this morning to ask why they have not received a payment and that the direct debit was cancelled from his account.We have beengoing through a rough patch with him cheating on me with another woman and she became pregnant and now he is seeing someone else.Is he up to no good?
2007-03-15 03:51:56 · 26 answers · asked by JUSEve 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What about our kids does he not care?
2007-03-15 03:52:45 · update #1
I hate to hear this if this is what is going at your home. Obviously he doesn't care about you or the kids because if he did then he would have at least told you that he was going to quit paying the mortgage so you wouldn't be just put out on the streets. It sounds like he has some issues and is need of some sort of help--could just be a good friend asking him what the heck is up with him--so he can work through them before his family begins to hate him.
2007-03-15 04:15:00 · answer #1 · answered by indydst8 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to hear that you are having such problems. What you do right now though can determine the way the rest of your life will go. Is he up to no good, yes it sounds like it. He has had two affairs on you? I feel for you, but I am afraid you can not save this marriage. He will always be the father of your children though. You can divorce your husband, but he will always be a part of your life. Try to get yourself to a very calm place and then ask him, in a non-confrontational way, why he made these changes to your mortgage payment without telling you. Ask him if he is leaving you( it kinda sounds like he may be preparing for that). If so ask him how he would like to deal with things like child custody, child support, who keeps the house, etc. Try to compromise and figure it out without a big court battle. It is cheaper and better for your children if you can find a way to end your relationship in a compromise rather then a fight. I know they say you should stay together "for the kids", but my parents did that and honestly I was relieved when they finally figured out they should be divorced, I was sick of the fighting and uneasiness in my home. Things were better for me after the divorce but my parents were still somewhat friends after the divorce, and they didn't fight the divorce process they came to compromises. Communication is a must right now even if it has not been good up to this point. Try to set the example now and see if he can follow. I truely feel for you, you are in a hard place. I hope you have a good friend or two to lean on during this hard time in your life.
2007-03-15 11:13:29 · answer #2 · answered by krissy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me see if I've got this straight- he cheated on you and impregnated another woman, and now he is seeing someone else? Do you really have to ask if "he is up to no good"? Are you kidding ? The first thing you need to do is to is talk to a lawyer. If your name is on the deed for the house and he has stopped making payments, you are just as liable as he is for the payments, and your credit will be affected negatively by letting the house go into foreclosure. Dump this loser.
2007-03-15 11:03:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He cannot sell it without your consent., However,if he doesn't pay the mortage, the bank can claim the house.
And no, he obviously doens't have a bond with the children. He will regret all this further down the line, but right now, take care of yourself and your kids. Get a lawyer.
2007-03-15 11:09:13 · answer #4 · answered by True Blue Brit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you need legal advise and to contact a solicitor.Firstly you jointly own the house and to sell it he would need your signature as well as his so you need to make an appointment with whoever you have your mortgage with then ring the bank and tell them the situation.Secondly book an appointment with a solicitor and tell them your situation and if i were you to file for divorce because once a cheat always a cheat and just remember there are children involved and this is for there welfare................good luck.
2007-03-15 11:09:48 · answer #5 · answered by sarah y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He can't sell the house without your consent if your name is on the deed. However, if he just stopped making payments then the bank can take the house (leaving you homeless with destroyed credit). Get a lawyer - TODAY
2007-03-15 11:03:29 · answer #6 · answered by selery222 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run don't walk to the nearest lawyer. He will give you all your rights in your state. This guy is a jerk. You have proof of adultry. Get out and get out now. You kids are better off with out this kind of guy in their lives. Get everything you can for you and your children and move on. You deserve someone that is good to you and the children. Don't waste you life on this loser. Don't let him steal from you any longer
2007-03-15 11:18:39 · answer #7 · answered by springer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea, he is up to no good! Lord, why are you still with this man/ He chated, and now he is with another woman? Get an attorney, and make sure you get half the equity from that house before he takes everything without you even knowing it.
2007-03-15 11:03:38 · answer #8 · answered by bina64davis 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's possibly too late at this point. Get a lawyer and get his assets frozen. You should have already done that once you found out he was cheating. You're basically going to be on damage control now. Does he care for you kids? Obviously not as much as you do....
2007-03-15 10:58:47 · answer #9 · answered by Lilith 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hate to tell you this, but if the house was in his name and he was paying for it, he can stop payment and sell it if he wants. If your name is on the mortgage or on the payments, then you have something to fight over. If you get a divorce, the most youll get is half the house, and then it still would be in your best intrest to just sell it.
My advice is to divorce him if you havent already, he sounds like an ***. and try to get what you can.
2007-03-15 10:55:42 · answer #10 · answered by matt_archbold2002 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋