How do you deal with hatred in a community full of suspicions?

Question

I live in africa.Most communities here are controled by clans.e.g the somali community has diffrent clans.There are those who feel they are superior than the rest.In my community there is only one tribe."THE KIKUYU"but has several clans.You may happen to fall in love with sobody from a diffrent clan or tribe and the elders[people who guides the clan]may say no.Given the reasons you totaly disagree with them coz they are outdated.In this communities ther are those which are okey to intermarry,but orthers are a taboo to even think about them.The elders makes us believe tha if you marry from a blacklisted community or clan,something terrible might befall your own family or bring a curse to a community.Now when i try to figure out this i just don't get it.All i see is just mere suspicions.Furthermore our forefathers believed in casting spells and curses,but now nothing like that happens anymore.I don't know whether am wrong,but ido believe tha change is inevitable how do i change things?

Answer 1

I am a Native American woman. Too many people tried to change my culture and now most of us are wanting to return to tradition and it is very difficult. Your elders have wisdom and they may make these decision for reasons you do not understand. Also there is probably a traditional way of going about this issue. I know I have read stories from Native women who said if something like this happened they would run away and "elope". Everyone has their own personal choice. You should not try and change the traditions of your whole community, excercise your own personal choice but do not put that on everyone else. Later you will regret the consequences of this. Talk to elders one on one and ask them how to solve the problem.

Answer 2

If you are able to influence the belief of others that will be a good start. Another thing, the Internet has so much international information that could help your people see how other cultures live that this could be an avenue that you can introduce to people in your community. Remember education is the key to change.

Answer 3

Education is the key.