Why am I good at sorting other peoples problems out,but not my own?

Question

I can read people very well & see their situations very clearly.I help people out when their marriages fail or they lose their confidence.I am well known for this ability I have & people always come to me when they need help.When the same things happen to me I get all in a mess.I can't think clearly at all.I used to have a male friend who thought like me in lots of ways.He could sort my head out for me when life was getting me down & vice versa.He is getting married this month & I don't see him anymore.I feel lost without him to talk to.How can I sort my head out on my own & why can't I just do it anyway?

Answer 1

Because when you are giving advise to others, you are an objective third party. Your heart and emotions are not involved to cloud your thinking. When you are the one who is dealing with it, your emotions take over and you cannot objectively look at the situation. I think that you should go to others for advise just like they do for you to "sort your head out". Hope every works out for you.

Answer 2

You can sort out your own head, you just need reassurance at times. You want to hear it from someone other than yourself. If you are in a situation that you know is unhealthy, a red flag immediately goes up. Its up to you to pay attention to it. You have a tendency to associate yourself and adapt to your situations. This makes you vulnerable to a certain extent. What I mean is that you might empathize with convicts, idolators, crazies, etc. You try not to be bias but there are times when you must avoid certain situations because they end up being detrimental to you. Your friend or associate that you had was only the voice that is already in your head telling you "don't do this, this isn't healthy". What I would do if I were you, is that, when you approach a situation that you are not 100% about, back away from it, take some time to think about it. Then approach it again at another time. This allows you time to think a little more clearly than having the feeling of being pressured or uncomfortable about a decision that you have to make at any particular time. People who think and talk at the same time are guilty of this. A person should think ,then speak, because if say everything that is going on in our minds right away, we may regret it later.Think,breathe, and pray about things that you are unsure about. Talk your problems through. You can and may ask several dependable people their advice on a particular subject instead of one person. After you have absorbed numerous opinions on one particular subject, then that may help you make a better decision. If all else fails just remember, you are human. You will make mistakes. Learning from your mistakes will make you much wiser the next time the same or similar situation arises. Experience sometimes is the best teacher. You are not perfect even though we all try to be at times.

Answer 3

You probably realize what you are supposed to do in a situation, you just let other factors talk you out of taking the proactive steps. It would be easy to see what a problem is, but taking the hard steps to rectify the situation would take courage and self esteem that a lot of people lack. If you are good at solving others problems then i'm sure deep down you know what you should do in your own. Don't let fear stop you and just go for it. If it's a specific problem you can find a support group for anything. A ton that meet online too, so you don't even have to go anywhere. Make some new friends that understand what you are going through.

Answer 4

using fact human beings often choose help. no longer all are self-reliant or be attentive to sufficient the thank you to overcome their issues. maximum folk are content textile to clutter alongside, putting up with their issues. some issues are intense and take an prolonged time to overcome, if in any respect. it could take many training, with guidance from a counselor, and then an assessment of how the customer did in following that guidance, then extra guidance. additionally, human beings notoriously do no longer see their issues (being too on the brink of them) and choose them wisely pointed out. the persons want a therapist to tell them: this is your problem and right this is what to do approximately it. to illustrate, i'm bi-polar. i did no longer study that, that that become my honestly condition and there is an undemanding medicine for it till I had suffered via alternating highs and depressions, for no less than twenty, probably extra years. Bi-polar is the two gentle or extra intense or very intense manic-melancholy (because it was referred to as). thankfully my condition become in the direction of the gentle-to average diploma, yet nonetheless particularly painful and problematical. yet I had a blind spot. I seen it a psychological condition, whilst in actuality that's a neurochemical cycle, that may in lots of cases be further below administration bodily particularly easily with an undemanding drugs this is in actuality a steel. Now if I hadn't had counseling (marital on the time), i might have in no way many times happening that. yet I certainly have lived a very "favourite" existence on that medicine for extra or less 2 many years now, resourceful and satisfied and effective.

Answer 5

...ever play chess?

you're probably pretty good too

...ever watch a game of chess?

you're probably even better when you watch

the human brain is like a camera - a camera cannot take a picture of itself but it can take a beautiful photo of anything else

we can see outside of oursleves with the camera lens

when we look inside we are no longer able to use our great camera equipment and end up using some cheap mirroring version of that camera

-hope you like the analogy and the main point of all this is that you will do well to DISCUSS your issues with someone else so they could use their camera on YOU!

Answer 6

The therapist's catch 22!!! I have the same problem. I end up writing down my problem, then reading it again a while later as if it were someone else's problem. It helps me be objective to myself.

Answer 7

Objectivity! But the fact that you realize that is a good start toward figuring things out. :)

Answer 8

Kinda like the bible reference to removing a stick from another's eye while you have a log in yours. Tough when you try self-analysis.

Answer 9

You may be perceptive but you are not motivated. It's easy to figure it all out but if your not willing to get off your butt and act on it then you'll find yourself asking questions like these your whole life!

Answer 10

maybe its easier to answer other peoples problems because whatever the outcome may be it doesn't truly effect you maybe its hard to take your own advise if you could give me an example i could help you