Well.. I can...just not now... you see, im in my post partum period... i still have 4 more weeks before the doctor says its ok to have sex.... but i feel bad that i cant get close to my husband in this way for now... Any suggestions on what i can do for my husband?? Ive heard horror stories that men seem to stray during this period because of lack of sex... and i really dont want that to happen... please help!
2007-03-14 17:35:37 · 23 answers · asked by cheesepoofies07 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sorry...i wasnt clear... we have been together 6 years...and married just a couple of months..
2007-03-14 17:45:54 · update #1
There's other things that you can do. You can get (almost) naked and cuddle. You can give him blow jobs, hand jobs, even rub his penis inbetween your breasts if they're not too sore. I'm sure he'll understand, just make sure you pay attention to him every once in a while.
2007-03-14 17:41:44 · answer #1 · answered by kadan 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sex is not the only thing that keeps men from straying. If he loves you, he will understand your situation. He would even be supportive because there is such a thing as post-partum depression so he should be there for you - and your baby. But yes, sex is something. You can give him pleasure in many other ways - oral, by hand, etc. Above all, show how much you love in words and in actions. He also needs some assurance.
2007-03-15 00:51:15 · answer #2 · answered by back stabbed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Share your fears with him. He needs to know how you are feeling. Guys suck at reading our signals and you don't want him to start worrying about what is wrong with you and making wrong guesses.
If your relationship is strong, he will be able to last a whole month. Especially if you can continue the intimacy in other ways. Be sure to set aside some cuddle time for just him, without the baby. No matter how much he loves the bay too, he will still start to feel left out, abandoned,alone. Snuggle under the covers together before going to sleep, hold his hand, give him random sexy kisses just to reassure him that you still have the drive and want to rip his clothes off as soon as the doc says ok.
Have you considered other alternatives? I know some girls can't stand oral sex, or even just using your hands, but it just might be what really helps him hang on. It will release some of his pressure and show him how much you care and value your sexual intimacy.
2007-03-15 00:44:44 · answer #3 · answered by c q 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of folks are offering sexual advise but there is a really important thing that you could do. It would be a wise measure to develop in your marriage.
Communicate your fears to your husband and work out a solution that works for both of you. You're not in high school anymore (one hopes) and it would really be wise to get your relationship on an adult footing. Respect him enough to think that he might want to keep the relationship enough to maintain a month so or sexual abstinence.
If you don't trust him in this matter why in the name of all that is holy did you have a child with him?
2007-03-15 00:49:00 · answer #4 · answered by QueenBean 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband should be at your side and support you in whatever way he can. If you can't have sex, it is not the end of the world. Both of you can still do things together like cooking something different every night (buy recipe books and try them out), make desserts (his favourite and yours), if you have kids, interact with them, watching tv, go see movies, go to the zoo, just have good, pure family fun and I am sure sex will not be on your minds, right? I hope these helps.
2007-03-15 00:44:01 · answer #5 · answered by happy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well to be honest, if thats all that hes there for then u dont need him that bad. If there is love there then he wont. No way in hot place below would i ever stray from my girl if she couldnt have sex. That would be retarded. Just be honest with him and maybe even ask him if he is ok with it. Explain all of it where he can actually understand.
2007-03-15 00:41:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you can please him in the bed, i heard that when you have an ice cube in your mouth and you gently rub your tounge on his neck or his chest its a big turn on and than you can just take him in the back room and do some naughty stuff to you. But if he says no than its probably because he is waiting for you to heal and become better so he can turn you on and you can turn him on but if anything just get him some porn and tell him to go all out LOL that always works and it keeps you from worrying so much. Good Luck
2007-03-15 00:58:59 · answer #7 · answered by mommyandbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
at least your trying to follow your doctors orders but i wasnt so inclined to do so after i gave birth. with my second child i had intercourse the third day after giving birthdespite doctors orders. it wasnt painful! however i dont recommend doing that because i did it for the same reason your afraid of. the thing is he still cheated after i gave into him.if a man is gonna cheat then he will do so no matter what you try doing. you just have to realize that!
2007-03-15 00:49:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you just gave him a kid... I think he should be ok waiting for you to give him something else..... Men are much more understanding then we give them credit for, especially new fathers, the time will pass so much quicker than you realize, with up all nights and feeding and its your turn flying around, sex is probably ok in the back seat for him too. Thats not to say that any man in his right mind is going to say no honey no oral for me thanks.... he'll probably appreciate it even more, and soemwhere down the road will even be eager to repay you.
2007-03-15 00:49:21 · answer #9 · answered by wherewasgodforthelost 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he can't stay committed after having something as great as that in his life... then who needs him. Sex wasn't even on my mind during the majority of this time. Buy him some porn and some Kleenex!
2007-03-15 04:32:17 · answer #10 · answered by mac_attack_51 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋