After having a conversation with my husband. I recently found that he belives that I am sexually selfish and/or lazy. He said that he wished that I was more sexually aggressive and assertive. But, he said he's always been sexually satisfied by me and this is something that transpired over time. Ok, clearly this confused the h*** out of me. What does he want? Be as detailed as possible. Oh yeah, I refuse to be/act crass or trashy. Its just not sexy to me and I know thats not exactly want he wants.
2007-03-14 16:31:39 · 12 answers · asked by ...huh... 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you need to make him feel wanted again it sounds like he does all steps to get it started try this one day when he comes home from work you start it off act like you 2 were dating for the first time it maybe just him starving for attention from you make him feel young again or just sit down and ask him what he would like for you to do sexually and in return tell him what you would like teach each other on the stuff that gets you 2 excited
2007-03-14 16:47:17 · answer #1 · answered by demondriver 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It probably depends on what you are doing. If it's the same thing every time he's probably looking for some variety or maybe something spontaneous. You can still be sexually satisfied, but bored. Maybe having some fun outdoors? Maybe he's looking for oral? Maybe he wants some light bondage? Without knowing what you do it is hard to say. The best thing to do without turning it into an argument is to sit him down and tell him you want him to find you exciting and you won't know what he wants unless he tells you. Ask him what his fantasies are. Tell him you'll make a list of things you'd like and he can do the same then trade lists and have some fun with it. Use it like two salesmen sitting down together and tell him you'll give him this, this and this on his list if he gives you three things off of his. It never hurts to be creative. And as far as being trashy, when it comes to pleasing your wife or husband and you keep the intimacy between yourselves only there are very few things that are obscene that you won't find pleasure in if it makes each other happier.
2007-03-14 23:53:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you haven't found out already your hubby wants you to take control once in awhile he is getting tired of always instigating the sex. Grab him rip his shirt off undo his belt with force, try biting him not hard but enough to get him going, Grab him good and hard and well you know maybe you don't give him head enough. Anywyas he wants you to be more wild is the sac that is all consider role-playing like he comes home from work and your in a skimpy french maids outfit or maybe a nurse outfit he can be the rich Hugh Hefner or the Dr.. He wants you to lose some of your inhibitions and go all sexy and crazy with him talk dirty you don't to act trashy or crass
guys just love to here stuff like oh you make me horny, or I'm so wet for you stuff like that you decide what you would like to say just get into the moment. When your married keeping
the intimacy alive makes a marriage strong and sometimes
that means doing something new and adventurous thats why we call it experimenting. I hope this helps God Bless and Good Luck!
2007-03-15 03:11:48 · answer #3 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him what he likes, what he wants and how you can both improve your sex life. Trying to guess what someone else wants or thinks is never a winning situation. A word to the wise for you both...being critical of performance on either part is never something that builds up and improves things. Be open with another and say honey this feels good, a little slower, a little faster, more to the right, etc. Being verbal and expressing what pleases one another is a great way to improve many things in your life. I hope this helps.
2007-03-15 01:11:32 · answer #4 · answered by curious74432 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well now that you've asked. I would suggest something my wife did for me. Everytime I asked for sex she never seemed interested. So it's kind of a bummer b/c if she's not "into" it, it's no fun. So I kinda stopped asking. My mistake I should have kept at it (she gets tired just like I do). Anyway back to your problem. When I would be laying down taking a short nap at night, she would either get in bed with me w/o any clothes on or my personal FAVORITE, climb on top of me w/o clothes on while I'm asleep. I'd slowly realize that hey, she's naked, ALL RIGHT!!!.....you can finish the rest of the story. I think the key is, show him you are interested. It worked with me and gave me extreme motivation to give her satisfaction
2007-03-14 23:41:59 · answer #5 · answered by bigdaddy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, "Grumpy1" he wants you to initiate sex more often. He wants you to do more than just lie there and bark out directions. He wants you to move during sex. He wants you to enjoy it and moan and talk and do go down on him and play with his balls and suck on his finger while you gaze into his eyes and kiss him, not play "who's banging the corpse."
Whenever I hear a woman say "I won't act crass or trashy" I just think you're one of those "ewww don't get any on me" kind of stuck up prissy broads who thinks sex is a chore that would be better left to robots. Good sex is often slippery, covered in perspiration, sloppy kisses, body juices, and whipped cream. If you're a prude, you should've told him before you got married you didn't like sex. Now he's stuck with you. He's considernig tying a rock around his neck and jumping in the ocean because you're one of those "geezus is sex all you ever think about? ewww. that's gross" wet blankets. If you had any nerve you'd divorce him and find some sexless toad to live out your days with in sexless prudish smugness, and free him up to find a woman with a normal attitude towards sex - I guarantee yours will never change.
Harsh, but there it is.
2007-03-15 02:12:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you and hubby need to have a serious sitdown talk about what the 2 of you want and what boundaries can be crossed and not crossed.
2007-03-14 23:46:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He wants to be able to lie back and relax once in a while during love making. Sometimes my wife has me doing so many things to her that it starts to feel like a job, but she's doing a lot too...........to herself.
2007-03-14 23:54:00 · answer #8 · answered by theanswerman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ron Paul is absolutely correct. We're needy like that.
2007-03-14 23:36:49 · answer #9 · answered by voodooprankster 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems like he's asking you for sex alot and it's causing you to lose interest, and I can totally understand, because I've done that with my wife and when I keep asking, it upsets her.
But when I don't ask her, she surprises me.
2007-03-15 00:22:13 · answer #10 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋