Ok. I had asked before what the "public" thought about me having a baby. Im 17 and my boyfriend is 18. We have been dating for over a year and I couldnt love him more. He has recently been asking me to have a baby with him. He has left it compleatly up to me. He would just like to have a child before his granfather dies because it was somthing his grandfather wanted to see happen. Im not worried about him leaving or anything and I know he would make an amazing father. We have worked it out so I could still go to colldge. We also both have decent jobs... (hes a working on a contracting liscence, and I currently work as an LNA makeing a bit over $10 per hr.) I just want to know opinions, and what you would do.
Thanx...
2007-03-14 16:09:07 · 17 answers · asked by kreepyemily 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I personally dont think your age has a thing to do with it. Do you feel comfortable being the soul provider of another living being? I am 21 and got pregnant on my honneymoon, but his daddy is in iraq so im doing this pretty much alone. Pregnancy isnt as enjoyable as they make it look, and well if the dad gets cold feet or even you, it doesnt cost a thing to leave if you arent married. If he wants a baby and you want to be with him, getting married would be a better option cuz it takes more thought to get out of(and money). You will want to get outta it too. I cant tell you how many times this being a mom and wife thing has terrified the living daylights outta me. But if you love him, you should make the official committment so that the baby will always know that mommy and daddy cared enough to lock each others love up with a ring, so he could have a stable family. If you are still going to school you will not want to have a baby-i plan to go back when mine starts kindegarten, and once you look into his eyes, you wont even want to go back to work. Babies need mommies every minute of every hour of every day, whether we give it to them or not they need it for the first couple of years.
2007-03-14 17:01:01 · answer #1 · answered by bluejeanwifey 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you two really want a baby then I suggest he marry you first. Move out on your own and see how life treats you. Can you make it? Think about the medical bills and the time missed from work. Can you afford it? Are you old enough to care for a child or do you still feel the need to go to clubs and party? I think having a baby is wonderful especially when the parents love and adore each other. I wish you two the best and all the happiness.
2007-03-15 01:58:52 · answer #2 · answered by my_own_frog 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON"T DO IT! You are still a baby. You'll end up miserable. You and your child will never get along. Remember you are still a child yourself. Your boyfriend is just HORNY. A brain is a terrible thing to waste. Children cost a LOT of money. They require a LOT of time. You will NEVER be free again. Get a baby sitting job. You'll see how hard it is. Grow up a little first. WAIT until you're at least 25+ before having a kid. Also make sure you get a good education. Earning $10.00 an hour will always keep you POOR. You can't pay rent, buy a car or FEED your kid on $10.00 per hour. You need a minimum of $50,000 per year. $70,000+ would be even better. Life is HARD. Don't make it harder.
2007-03-14 23:23:17 · answer #3 · answered by mjorod 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My opinion is that, since more than 10 hours a week separation from mommy is very very harmful to an infant and to toddlers, any plan that includes you working and going to school for the first four years of your baby's life is bad for the baby. Your baby should not be created because grandpa wants to see one. Your baby shouldn't come before you are married, have enough money to actually be a mother to your child, and you two have been through enough together so that you can not only love him, but have taken his measure. One year at 18 years old is not enough for you to observe to know how he handles stress, copes with responsibility, etc.
Given his focus on giving his grandfather a baby, i'd be wondering why he picked you.
2007-03-14 23:19:23 · answer #4 · answered by cassandra 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I personally think you need to not have a child when you are only 17. Im sorry but the excuse about his grandfather just isnt good enough for any 17 year old to be having a child. You need to think you get pregnant, have a baby, his grandfather sees the baby, he dies, then what.............you are stuck at 18 with a baby and is basically tied down. I dont really think it is worth it. Best thing to do is wait finish school and be a kid. That is what you still are. You dont want to waste your young years being a mom..........think about it
2007-03-14 23:16:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Having a baby for some old guy wanting to see his prodigy is not a reason to have a baby! You are still so young and not even 21 yet! Marriage before the carriage hun! Give this relationship some time and see if this guy is willing to commit in marriage. Go from there. How a guy is with kids he doesn't have to take home does not attest to his skills!
2007-03-14 23:28:18 · answer #6 · answered by coxy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you should worry so much about what people are going to think, what matters is what you and your bf feel and think. Having a child is a lifetime committment it doesnt end at age 18. Are you and bf ready for that? Maybe babysit for a friends' baby for a few days in a row and see how you feel, oh but add on to that no sleep for about 2 years and breast feeding every 2 hours for 12 months. Its great but man, exhausting as ****.
2007-03-14 23:24:12 · answer #7 · answered by joolee 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well it sounds like you have a really good head on your shoulders, normally I would totally pound it into you that having a child is hard work and takes alot of money but you seem to know that already, So I say go for it. Just remember that you have to do anything to make your family happy and get married before or as soon as you find out that your pregnant. It will make your family feel more secure.
2007-03-14 23:19:12 · answer #8 · answered by JUDAS RAGE 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would wait tell he has a job working as a contractor before you make any decisions. If your hearts set on it, than good luck but just know that being a teenager and pregnant is very hard.
2007-03-15 00:09:54 · answer #9 · answered by Mama of 2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure, have a child so you can spend the rest of your life, 60 or more years, so that his grandfather can die knowing you had one...............think about this. Why not tell him how much you love each other and plan on getting your education. Let him know of your future plans. He will get as much satisfaction knowing that.
2007-03-14 23:50:31 · answer #10 · answered by mel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋