My boyfriend is very intelligent studying law but I feel black women is his down fall. He told me how he was so hurt by black girls and will never date them again so why does he keep flirting with them when he thinks Im not paying attention. We could be watching b.e.t. or something and he's like DAMN she is fine under his breath. I'm insecure of this and has developed a strong dislike for black women. I might just start messing with white guys again.
Why is he really with me then?
2007-03-14 15:59:51 · 27 answers · asked by hailey 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
u guys sound immature and need to break up cuz seriously lol wow
2007-03-14 16:03:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
First of all you should not let him or this situation make you dislike black women. It's not our fault that he's making you feel this way. Instead of getting upset with every black female out there you need to dump this guy. He has no respect for you. Try finding a black guy that loves you for you. It doesn't matter whether he's black, white, or whatever. A guy of any color can disrespect you in this way. You just have a disrespectful loser on your hands and you need to find better. Don't take this hostility out on us black females because the problem is not us it's him. He definitely has problems when he comes off saying he doesn't date black women anymore because he's been hurt by them. Any smart person would know that any girl from any race will hurt you. It's not the color, it's the person. Do yourself a favor and move on sweetie. He doesn't sound worth keeping, and if you do keep him around your just asking to be disrespected further down the road. Don't hold hostility towards black women. That's just not right.
2007-03-15 06:20:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It seems like your bf got into an interracial relationship for the wrong reason. Not all black men are like that, but your bf may very well be. No one should ever date another race because of a dislike for his own race (you can almost call it self-hate) or because he "gave up" on his race (meaning that you, as a white person, aren't really his first choice, when he shouldn't be dating based on race anyway)...it's total bs. And it's not healthy for you to remain in a relationship with someone like that.
You have every right to be concerned, I wouldn't call this insecurity. Just don't take his actions and apply it to the whole race...he is an individual and he has his own problems that really aren't your problems. Also, don't hate other women because of your bf's disrespect. Too many women do this and it has got to stop...nobody held a gun to this guy's head and told him to disrespect you. By blaming the wrong person, you are telling him it is okay to disrespect you, and you will get caught in the cycle. Find somebody who will give you the respect you deserve.
2007-03-14 16:21:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
every man, no matter what kind of relationship he is in, will appreciate a fine woman. there is nothing wrong with looking. i'm sure you appreciate hot looking guys too. you're being insecure, and blaming it on the women. if a man acts like he hasn't noticed a beautiful woman, he's either lying, or is dead below the belt.
you need to have a respect and understanding for the fact that your guy finds black women attractive. that is a part of his sexual make-up. take off the rose colored glasses and deal with your OWN hangups. the problem lies within YOU.
as for his flirting, you need to look at that again. is he REALLY being flirtacious with other women, or are you being paranoid around a black woman who crosses his path? if he really is flirting and you don't like it, let him know point blank, because SOME black men will try to get away with being disrespectful with their white girlfriends. they will act improperly because they think that a white woman won't speak up for herself. hopefully, your guy isn't that kind of person, but you never know.
why is he with you? obviously, he must enjoy your company, and finds you really great to be around. if you're really not sure why this guy wants to be in a relationship with you, it might be time to re-evaluate this and make a decision.
your last line about "messing with white guys again" tells me that you are attracted to this guy because he is a black law student, not because he is a wonderful man to be around. you mention finding a new white guy, rather than finding a different MAN to share your time with.
if you just want this brotha because he's a fine black stud mandingo, then that explains the issues you are experiencing. a superficial relationship cannot be expected to be a true relationship of respect and trust.
need to check yourself, hun.
2007-03-14 16:23:26 · answer #4 · answered by soulsista 3 · 6⤊ 0⤋
The thing to remember is that he is with you, not them. Sounds like you're boyfriend is just possibly a flirt. Is it only black women he's looking at or are you just more self-conscious when it's black women? By saying that you may 'just start messing with white guys again' kinda shows your immaturity though. What exactly would that prove?
2007-03-14 16:19:20 · answer #5 · answered by Sunidaze 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
First of all, black women are beautiful . But, men are attracted to a variety of women. We crave variety. I usually love big booty women , but occassionally i see a skinny chic who is hot and i look. this is why alot of guys watch porn. We can see thick, slim, fat, black , brown, asian or whatever and get a variety. It doesn't mean he likes you any less. Its just how men are. Luckily my wife is not jealous. She knows I love beyonce and she doesn't care what i say about beyonce and she also knows i love to look at nice round butts, so she doesn't mind as long as i'm with her, whats the big deal. He is with you, therefore he wants to be there. He may be physically attracted to other women, so what. He is with you. Whether you are with a white or black guy, it doesn't matter. I am white and i love to look at women. Color should not be the issue. Men are men. I mean my best friend is black with a white wife and when he cheats, its with mostly black women, but his wife is white. Men will take what they can get if they are cheating. Just because your man chose to be with you doesn't mean he doesn't find black women attractive.
2007-03-17 03:50:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I note that you aspect out that whenever you note an eye-catching black lady you immediately get insecure. i did not study some thing on your submit about him no longer watching women human beings of alternative races.therefore by ability of your human being submit it style of feels your problem is including your lack of self assurance about black women human beings.
2016-12-02 00:48:59 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because he stopped dating us does not mean is not attracted. Did you really believe that he would not look at any black women anymore...secret to non black women dating black guys, most of them are still trying to kick it with us even though they may tell you otherwise
2007-03-14 16:58:39 · answer #8 · answered by micheleh29 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It might be a natural reaction he can't control. I've noticed black men with white women get extra attention from black women. Although it's usually negative attention, ANY female attention is good I guess.
2007-03-14 16:06:05 · answer #9 · answered by mac man 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
You should be glad he didn't run into me; he would have left your *** a long time ago, sorry. Don't you see, he is search for the person and when he finds one he gonna leave so why don't you hate him instead of black women; they haven't done anything to you but happened to be in places where they are welcomed.
2007-03-15 12:45:01 · answer #10 · answered by Ally cat 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Thats what happens when you have a man dating you for the color of your skin as opposed to who you are as a person. You guys both sound like you have issues with the opposite sex of your own race.
2007-03-16 05:25:37 · answer #11 · answered by piscesgurl310 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋