He watches as the cold blood from his wrist,
onto the cold floor,
The razor falls from his hand,
as he took his last breath,
he slowly fades away,
slowly death leads him to the gates of hell,
he left without no note,
no reason why,
he left witout saying gooodbye,
hes no longer in pain,
they hoped he left in pace instead pain,
theres nothing left to gain,
their all grieving
their hearts bleeds,
their fears are coming true,
Slowly those feelings
Were clouded by what they know now,
their hearts screaming,
breaking the silence,
he life ended so fast,
OH GOD WHY!?!?!?
WHY DID HIS LIFE ENDED SO QUICKLY!?!?!?
WHY?!?!?!?!?...................
oh god why!
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was it good?
was there any errors?
what did u think of it???
did it make sense 2 u???
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2007-03-14 14:42:14 · 5 answers · asked by Vampire Goth 1 in Education & Reference ➔ Words & Wordplay
He watches as the cold blood from his wrist,
onto the cold floor,
The razor falls from his hand,
as he took his last breath,
he slowly fades away,
slowly death leads him to the gates of hell,
he left without a note,
no reason why,
he left without saying gooodbye,
hes no longer in pain,
they hoped he left in pace instead pain,
theres nothing left to gain,
their all grieving
their hearts bleeds,
their fears are coming true,
Slowly those feelings
Were clouded by what they know now,
their hearts screaming,
breaking the silence,
he life ended so fast,
OH GOD WHY!?!?!?
WHY DID HIS LIFE ENDED SO QUICKLY!?!?!?
WHY?!?!?!?!?.....................
oh god why!
2007-03-14 15:02:35 · update #1
He watches as the cold blood from his wrist,
onto the cold floor,
The razor falls from his hand,
as he took his last breath,
he slowly fades away,
slowly death leads him to the gates of hell,
he left without a note,
no reason why,
he left without saying gooodbye,
hes no longer in pain,
they hoped he left in pace instead pain,
theres nothing left to gain,
they're all grieving
their hearts bleeds,
their fears are coming true,
Slowly those feelings
Were clouded by what they know now,
their hearts screaming,
breaking the silence,
he life ended so fast,
OH GOD WHY!?!?!?
WHY DID HIS LIFE ENDED SO QUICKLY!?!?!?
WHY?!?!?!?!?.....................
oh god why!
2007-03-14 15:51:16 · update #2
It was very good in your final draft. I am assuming that this will be used for an eulogy. It's great. This was personal, wasn't it?
2007-03-21 16:33:30 · answer #1 · answered by LINDA D. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, blood coming off a wrist wouldn't be cold. And it's so dramatic I just had to quit. Sorry.
2007-03-20 22:38:23 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It made a lot of sense to me, sounds emo but it's cool. It has good meaning but why did you put "ENDED"? Other than that, it's a good poem and shows meaning to what some kids do to themselves, and not just kids either.
2007-03-14 21:51:20 · answer #3 · answered by TexasPunk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pretty sad story. Move on little lady.
2007-03-19 00:36:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
"he left without no note"
He left without a note
"he left witout saying gooodbye"
Without.
"their all grieving"
They're all grieving
2007-03-14 21:51:36 · answer #5 · answered by Joan McBitch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋