I'm 6 weeks and 6 days pregnant. Adoption is not an option for me because if I have a child, I want it to always know who their mother is ( I never knew mine, she left when I 6 months old and died when I was six). I don't think that I'm financially, mentally, or emotionally prepared for a child. And the father (my ex now) told me that our relationship isn't going to change just because I'm having a baby (we're friends but I'm still inlove with him).
2007-03-14 08:31:21 · 44 answers · asked by Cathy 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
What in the hell kind of question is this? To have or not to have is a question only you and/or your family can answer, not COMPLETE STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET!
2007-03-14 08:35:20 · answer #1 · answered by Aaliyah & Natalie's Mommy 6 · 5⤊ 2⤋
It's a hard call. I don't agree with abortion and i completely understand were your coming from when you don't want to give up your baby for adoption. The hardest thing is carrying a baby for nine months and then handing it over to a stranger.
It's even worse when the father doesn't want a relationship but did you speak to him about what kind of roll he will play if you keep the baby? Will he be around and help you take care of the baby? What does he think about the entire ordeal?
I know it's hard having a child when you don't know if you can afford it but to be completely honest you'll never be financially ready for a baby, no one ever really is.
You can always get Medicaid, that's why we have the opportunity for assistance. People put others down for living that way but these are the reasons why we have it. Don't see yourself short, you can always make something out of yourself for you and your child. It's never easy but it's a part of life.
Of course no matter what others opinions on the situation it's all up to you. If you really feel the need and that you can't handle it than do what's best for you.
2007-03-14 08:42:05 · answer #2 · answered by Curious J. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I actually took time to read over some of the answers given by others and can't believe how cold people can be. One example of many is this..."Have an abortion because if you don't want it, no one else will either". What an idiot!!!! Please don't listen to that fool. There are thousands of couples, (many of whom cannot have children of there own), waiting for a child just like yours, who will give him/her a wonderful and loving home.
An abortion can and probably will leave emotional scars that will be with you for the rest of your life. Abviously everyone is different, but is that a chance you want to take.
Whether someone else believes it is "murder" or not is not important. What is important is that child growing inside of you. That is a human life that you helped to create. Inside of you there may be a world leader, or doctor, or whatever.... That little person inside you may impact this world in a way you cannot even imagine. Or they may be a stay at home mom. Something you didn't have the pleasure of having. Don't deny that to the unborn.
I'll be praying for you.
2007-03-16 01:37:07 · answer #3 · answered by shane 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The choice to have the baby is your own but who the child will live with is up to the judge. If you believe your not stable Dad may fight you in court and you'll spend the next 18 years paying child support. On the other hand you will have a beautiful child and human being to be friends the rest of your life with.
Time to get responsible and take hold of yourself now. Get stable, you can do it. Seek help from those close to you.
I have been through your exact situation and I can't imagine life without my Michael. He is truly god's gift. Although I am pro-choice I personally don't believe to have an abortion, I was right not too.
2007-03-14 08:59:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suggest NOT to have the abortion, its only Gods right to take the life of a person. Adoption is an option, that you should look into, and yes I agree with Joel S, a Crisis Pregnancy Center would be one of the best places to look into about this situation. You want this child to know its mother... then give the child the chance to KNOW you as its mother.
I will be praying for you as well and God bless!
2007-03-15 10:25:46 · answer #5 · answered by jesse j 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bad place to ask this question!
You have to do whats best for you. But, regardless to whether or not you think you're ready... at some point you figure it all out and things work out just fine. I'm 27 and pregnant with my first baby. I wasn't ready. it wasn't planned. But, condoms break and now I'm pregnant. And, even though when I found out, I was scared and stressed out... now I am soooo excited. I figured if there are 16 year old little girls having babies, I know I can handle this.
You just have to believe in yourself. Since you feel so strongly about adoption... I wouldn't recommend abortion either. You'll really end up regretting that. You'll have to live with the fact that you didn't even give your baby a chance. I know I couldn't live with myself.
Good luck!
2007-03-14 08:48:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have to do what you can ultimately live with. Anyone who tells you what you should or shouldn't do to your body doesn't know you or have your best interests at heart. I will say that I have a 10 month old child and I don't know what I would do (mentally, finacially or emotionally) without her father. Parenting is easier with 2, it can be done alone but is twice the work. If my situation had been different when I found out that I was pregnant I know I would have had an abortion. If you are going to have an abortion do so soon. This is a hard choice and one you have to look inside yourself for the answer. Good luck
2007-03-14 08:38:59 · answer #7 · answered by Mandy W 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Child, we need to talk. What you are saying is that you'd rather KILL your baby instead of him/her being raised by someone else. Does that sound right to you? I know it's a tough situation to be in, but the pain (mental and physical and spiritual) that you are going to feel if you abort your baby is far worse than the pain of being adopted...and if you wanted to, you could EASILY choose an open adoption where the child could know you and you the child and you could explain to the child why you had to give her up(you can't explain to an aborted baby why it is you chose to kill it). There's lots of options. Think about it. Don't become another statistic of someone who had sex and got pregnant and it didn't fit their schedule or plans so they took the life of their little baby. Do one thing before you even consider such a thing. Go to your OB and have an ultrasound. Look at that tiny little heart clearing beating on the screen and ask yourself if you are really capable of such a thing. I hope you won't. I'll keep you in my prayers.
2007-03-14 08:48:47 · answer #8 · answered by Heavenly Advocate 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i am 100% against abortion i think that with all the good couples out there who cant have children adoption would be the way to go and so many adoption agencys now days will actually let you be a part of your childs life through pictures, letters and even meeting them eventually dont let some man push you into killing your baby because he doesnt want to be with you this is as much a part of YOU as it is of him wouldnt you feel better in the years to come knowing that your child has a family and a chance at life rather that just killing it sacrafice is the purest form of love i know of. and just think there is a life growing inside of your it has a heartbeat! it can turn into a wonderful person! Good luck on your desicion.
2007-03-14 08:41:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I don't think that you should have an abortion. You should have a child of your own, so keep the baby. I understand that you never really knew your mother, because I have never knew my father EVER since the day I was born. Make the right choices! It's your choice to have a baby or not. Good luck to you! :)
2007-03-14 08:44:03 · answer #10 · answered by ivory_plr 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Thats a question only you can answer. Is it something you will be able you live w/ the rest of your life?? You said adoption isn't an option, your mother left, but at least she gave you a chance to live your own life-would you rather she of aborted you? Just think about it and decide what is right for you.
2007-03-14 08:42:02 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋