How would you react if you found out that the person you trusted the most is gay?
2007-03-14 07:15:25 · 18 answers · asked by Abang 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
What if he didn't come out to you, but you got to know it through rumours and/or accusations?
My deepest gratitude to all that have answered. Thank you all.
2007-03-14 08:51:09 · update #1
I have five very close friends who are gay. I have no problem with it at all. It feels good when someone trusts and respects you enough to come out to you.
2007-03-14 21:34:11 · answer #1 · answered by DawnDavenport 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, this happened to me with one of my best friends. I wouldn't necessarily say that I trusted him the most, but we were very good friends...and still are. It was never a surprise to me that he was gay. We had all expected it for a long time. To this day we are very good friends and his homosexuality has no hinderance on our relationship.
Before he actually came out and told me, however, I'll admit that I was a little homophobic. It's not that I was rude to gays, I just didn't know too many of them. Now that I have numerous homosexual friends, I'm totally fine with it. I think a lot of straight people would be more accepting of homosexuality if they actually KNEW someone who was gay.
2007-03-14 14:25:41 · answer #2 · answered by hs329 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just a little shocked if that person had been acting really "heterosexual" for as long as i had known them (especially if i had known them for years and all those years they had been keeping up the front) i'd be surprised how they managed to lie so good about something that is so difficult to hide.
but other than that, i wouldnt have the slightest problem with the situation. that person was my friend, right? so that means i never had anything "going on" with them. if we were just friends - and such CLOSE friends, at that (since u used the words "trusted the most") - then their sexual life shouldnt affect me on any level. we would still talk about the same stuff and do the same things, with the extra bonus that now that everything is out in the open we can be even closer still, since honesty between friends makes the bond between them even stronger!!!
u should be happy about this situation!! i'm guessing ur of the same biological gender of ur homosexual friend, right? so i s'pose the reason ur feeling so weird about this is coz ur EITHER afraid of what ppl will say about u now that someone so close to u, who u prolly spent lots of time with, turned out to be homosexual. OR ur afraid that this person wasnt really ur friend, but that they were only with u coz they digged u as something MORE....
well... my advice to u (since the very same thing has happened to me not too long ago, in fact) is dont change the relationship u had with this person. they want to be ur friend and i'm sure they still want ur trust!! forgive them for holding back on u and dont forget that it is VERY hard for someone to actually come out clean about something that personal. repsect the fact that they told u (or if u found out some other way, respect the fact that they didnt feel ready to tell u yet, but prolly needed more time). dont lose a good friend over something this stupid. good friends r hard to find, especially ppl who trust and love u..... dont ruin what u have just coz society has made u narrowminded about the homosexual community. that is not ur friend's fault. i'm sure for them to have been such a close friend of urs they r a good person and would never hurt u. i'm equally certain that u wouldnt want to harm them either. so dont hurt their feelings by judging them on something that they cannot help.
believe me, they'll appreciate it!! and u'll be much better friends after this!!!
just go for it!
2007-03-14 14:46:59 · answer #3 · answered by bukroot 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would be grateful I could trust that person. Whether they were gay or not would make absolutely difference at all. People are people no matter which side they bowl for. Be more accepting.
2007-03-14 14:20:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The person I trust the most is gay. I continue to trust him because he's one of my best friends and his sexuality has nothing to do with that.
2007-03-14 14:25:51 · answer #5 · answered by Julia Sugarbaker 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I went through four years of high school with this friend of mine. We did everything together. After high school we still hung around together and then one day he told me that he was gay. I said so what. We traveled together, slept together to save money on motels. He respected our frendship, nothing ever happened. I had met his gay friends and he told them that I was straight, no one ever made advances. I know that it is something that you do not choose. A friend is a friend !!!!!!
2007-03-14 16:39:25 · answer #6 · answered by RIKKI LEE 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not straight, but I can tell you that when my friends who do happen to be straight found out, their trust in me never changed. I was and am totally trustworthy.
I can be a bit obnoxious at times, but am always trustworthy. :)
2007-03-14 14:31:51 · answer #7 · answered by castle h 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
All of my friends that are Gay and Bisexual did not tell me until they were ready to. They thought that I would "freak out" but I didn't. It wouldn't make difference.
2007-03-14 14:40:46 · answer #8 · answered by : ) 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If they truly trusted the person it shouldn't matter, if not then it's no real loss to lose a fake friend.
2007-03-14 14:21:03 · answer #9 · answered by IndyT- For Da Ben Dan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be supportive of him or her and feel honoured that they were brave enough to tell me. I would not treat them any differently than I would any other person.
I have friends who are straight as well as bisexual and I treat them all the same; as friends, so should you.
2007-03-14 14:20:01 · answer #10 · answered by jessicadiamond_4einc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋