Doctor Dating his/her patient?

Question

I'm doing a debate on this topic, and I was lucky enough to be against a doctor dating his patient.

for anyone who would like to try to contradict my speech I would greatly appreciate it.

I won't give my speech fully, I'll just give my main points.
-dating patient can only cause a doctors mind to become clouded, and not give a proper treatment
-by dating a patient, the patient will not be less comfortable giving full information to the doctor, like to complain about his/her genital herpes
-dating a patient is unethical, but at the same time it's understood doctors have feelings as well, therefore if they find the need to date their patient, what would the problem be in refering them to another doctor and continue the relationship?

I have more points, but I would like to hear people contradict my points, and maybe even raise more points. I'm not looking for a "I agree with you" answer, I want contradictions. Try to destroy my points, corner

* I mean the patient will not feel comfortable telling the doctor about some very personal problems like herpes, sorry for the confusion

Answer 1

-I can't agree with your first point about the doctors mind become "clouded." What type of abstract point is this? Actually a doctor who really gets to know you very well can help you the best. It's kinda like having your own personal
"trainer"

'not be less comfortable' -Totally agree here. He or she will be more comfortable. It may actually require those "special moments in time" for real issues to come out. This well help the patient.

-What do you mean by unethical? Are we not debating to determine what is ethical? What about the "free choice" of the patient. If the patient wants to stay with his or her doctor-who are we to say otherwise. Why should we have a law that can disrupt a perfectly good patient treatment?

Answer 2

So to debate your points.
1) I think this is true, because I know a lot of people whose minds may become clouded if, say, they suspected their partner were to have cancer. Therefore, having a caring relationship with your doctor where he/she knows you and understands you is great, however, it's an entirely different thing to be completely emotionally involved.
2) However, although someone may not want to reveal medical conditions that may affect their partner/doctor, they may be more likely to reveal personal and embarassing medical conditions with their partner than they would with a stranger whom they cannot predict a reaction from.
3) That last point is kind of pro-dating...I think that there is a huge problem with dating that person, even if you are no longer their doctor. The problem with continuing the relationship would be that the doctor, when he/she is your doctor, is in a position of power. Now, if you date that person, that power that the doctor had has now transferred to this relationship. Also, the doctor/partner knows things about you you may not tell a partner, at least at the beginning of a relationship.
4) Another major thing that can come up is patient-doctor confidentiality. Where does the boundary lie in these dual relationships?
5) Another major point is, what if the relationship doesn't last? I know at least in my area, there's a doctor shortage, so you may not be able to switch doctors if the relationship doesn't work out. Also, would you want your ex to be handling all your intimate medical information, especially if the breakup was not a good one?

Answer 3

Ok, these are none of my personal beliefs, but I have seen posting on this site spew some of the following:

- I don't see how dating my Dr. should not be allowed, if they really care about me, they are only going to want to go the extra mile to do what is best for me.

- Why should I have to change Dr.'s just because I found one that I really like and is good at what they do which made the person all the more attractive to me and they feel the same way. The next Dr. might not be a talented and might even be a quack. It is not fair!

- If I were dating my Dr., I would be able to be more honest and open about my past medical history and they would "know" me and and I would be ever so much more comfortable telling them. They will know my sexual history as they have now become a part of it.

- They can't tell I had a boob job it they are a dermatologist, right?

- If I see my Dr. on the sly and keep it a secret from everyone else, it will make the relationship all the more mysterious and exciting because it is forbidden and it is just "our little secret". It is not like I plan on marrying them or them me...we are just having a fling.

Answer 4

I got diagnosed with herpes simplex virus (type 2) about 6 yrs ago, while I was still in college and had a foolish one-night stand. I understand lots of young ladies will declare this, but I swear I had never done that sort of thing before. I just made a huge mistake that one time and all of a sudden it seemed like I was going to have to live with the consequences for my entire life. The worst part was feeling I could never date men again. After all, who wants to go out with a girl who has sores around her private parts? But since a friend shared this movie https://tr.im/4DWtA everything changed.

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Answer 5

I am from California so I don't know from a legal point of view in NYC; but it seems VERY unethical. This person put their trust in you as a physician to cure them so its understandable that a bond would form. However, the attraction that the patient places in you might misguided because of a dependence issue.

Answer 6

I know one that married a patient. I always suspected her of being a seeker of pain meds. I think his prescription pad is what attracted her to him.