My wife of 11 yrs has agreed to try again after a nasty separation of almost a month. We have two children. The problem started when she met someone on yahoo answers that really "ignited her fire". She dropped the bombshell on valentines day 07 that our marriage was over due to this freak in miami who obviously likes wrecking peoples marriage, he persued and expressed his undying love for her knowing her to be married, "Cheers Shaun the firefighter". Anyway she says she is willing to try again but is still spending time on the internet, and recieving emails from a male friend upto 11 oclock at night.
Is she just having a laugh or is she going to stray off down the same route?
If the Internet had nearly wrecked my marriage, I would certainly be willing to cut this out to make a go of things. Should she, Is she genuinely trying?
2007-03-14 06:38:51 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
This may be hard for you to hear but your wife would not have been unfaithful if there hadn't been a problem to start with. That doesn't necessarily mean it's your problem, it could be her. But things must have already been wrong for her to assume that Shaun the firefighter would solve the problem.
If things are going to work then you need to get to the route of what went wrong rather than trying to deal with the symptom. If she is still chatting to guys on the internet then she's probably keeping her options open which suggests that she's not confident that things will work out.
Keep it in your head that her infidelity was a cry for help. Find out what's really wrong, or it's never going to work out.
2007-03-14 07:15:02 · answer #1 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get yourself a key-logger. Install it, wait a couple of weeks, then log into it when she's not around. If she's still messing aound with him or anyone else, and doesn't suspect a key-logger, it will tell you. It records everything (emails, text messages, user id's, passwords, screen shots, chat logs).
If she is still being dishonest, file for divorce like 65% of the population has already done. Love in marriage is gone. Marriage is now the starting point to see who can go the longest without cheating.
2007-03-14 06:48:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesnt sound like it. I personally would not give her anotha chance. It sounds like she is playing. Any ways what kind of woman would leave her two kids and husband for a man on the internet knowing ppl lie, and perverts hang out on the internet. I mean why risk leaving something stable for someone you can meet and they turn out to be the opposite of what they said or be killer or anything. I wouldnt even waste my time and 11 yrs was long enough
2007-03-14 06:43:49 · answer #3 · answered by Im da Example 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think internet chat rooms can be really addictive. Is she lonely? Try and get her outside the house to do things. I have a friend who had a similar problem who was struggling with depression and loneliness who got "hooked" on this. Getting out of the house and meeting new people helped her to break the cycle.
2007-03-14 06:45:24 · answer #4 · answered by Delerious? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she was genuinely trying she would not still getting emails from him. She would cut it off with him if she really wanted to try and work things out. Tell her how you feel and she doesn't stop disconnect the Internet and see what she does then.
2007-03-15 07:10:01 · answer #5 · answered by Debbie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So far, her behavior suggests that she finds it more convenient to have a roof over her head and a live-in babysitter, while she flirts online. Not looking good, really. Try to get her to counseling with you. If she'd rather be online than try to repair her marriage, go to counseling without her. If getting custody of your kids is important to you, consult a lawyer NOW about what kind of evidence you should be gathering in order to effect that. This is a pretty crummy situation to find yourself in. My sympathies, and Good Luck!
2007-03-14 06:56:52 · answer #6 · answered by katbyrd41 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i do believe she is beginning to stray off on the same route. shes not trying if shes still on the internet and maybe if you seemed not to care at all, changed your look into a sexy look, and stayed out longer hours without her knowing where you were(without doing anything to hurt the marriage). im sure she'd lighten up your load.
2007-03-14 06:46:39 · answer #7 · answered by doraisastar1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you know if she is tring or not. You cant try to much to save a marriage but the time she is spending on the interenet is taking time away from you. Let her know how it makes you feel and if she continues then she doesnt care.
Good Luck
2007-03-14 06:48:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guts have been married for 11 years and no guy in this world can change that. You know here better than anyone. It will fall through. Be easy God bless
2007-03-14 06:44:52 · answer #9 · answered by Chris T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they always like the guy who tells her how pretty she is ,but doesn't see what she looks like in the am or has to deal with your children. She is a beautiful women who just needs to be loved until he realizes that she has baggage and has a saggy body to go with it. romance will be over soon and then she will want you back. TOO LATE! let that saggy *** ***** go and take the kids! F HER!!
2007-03-14 06:48:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋