is it true what they say about trust??

Question

if u have been lied to by your partner and u lost trust in him or her- do u ever get it back? ( given that they make a huge effort to gain it) or does it continue to lack? If u speak from experience I am willing to listen.....

Answer 1

You never get it back to the same level, because the doubt is always there.. You have to accept the new level you can get to...

Answer 2

trust is the hardest to find but also the easiest thing to lose. there are times where your partner will lie to you or do something that will make your trust go into the trash. Personally from my experience, i have lost trust into my partner because of his lies that he had been giving me. My partner has made up a lie of him not "looking" for other girls while he was with me. Apparantly and unfortunately, i found out about this because of a instant message that popped up at my apartment while he was in the kitchen. The instant message was basically asking him when he and her were going to set out a dinner date together and a movie...so tell me that he was somewhat cheating on me. And of course it was me not being nosy; i asked him if he needs the computer and he said no before he went into the kitchen. So it was not my fault that his IM popped up. I mean yeah it pissed me off, but i knew that people make mistakes and well to him he is my everything and we still together now.Honestly, trust takes effort and time to gain back . My partner is and was worth keeping even though my trust for him because i love him so much. Yes it really hurt me for what he has done, but he prooved to me that he wants to gain trust back. As long as he or she shows that they want trust back, then i would give it a try although it will take alot of effort and time. My partner has gained all the trust and we are still together for 2 1/2 years and things are going great. He has not lied to me or decieved my trust for him and i am happy that i can trust him again.

Answer 3

I lost trust in my first wife within a year after getting married and tried to regain it. After 13 1/2 more years infidelity occurred again. The trust that was broken after the first year never came back completely. To this day, I do not believe in second chances. Some people may be able to change, but from what I have experienced and from others I know that have gone through it, once trust is broken it cannot be fully recovered. I also don't think a tiger can change his stripes.

Answer 4

It takes a long time to regain trust in some one, if you ever do, for some the action that broke the trust may always be first and foremost on their minds. Its the what ifs that come with the broken trust that keeps the trust from really being 100%. Best of Luck

Answer 5

it depends on your heart it doesn't matter what they lied about the fact is that they lied trust is a lot when it comes to relationships but if your heart is in it then you know what to do I'm in a relationship now going on 10 years same man and if he lied to me i will forgive him no matter little or big a lie is a lie but i will never forget this man have my heart and i feel like he deserves a second chance with me but you have to decide about your partner listen to your heart only you will know if you'll gain trust back if the relationship is going to go lacking then i suggest you break it off no need in prolonging a dead end everybody deal with trust different good luck

Answer 6

I think it depends on the type of lie. My partner has lied to me and I confronted her. I knew she did it because she didn’t want to hurt me. The thing is that not telling me bothered me more than the act itself. Now, I trust her although at times I’m insecure, but things are getting better. At the end it comes down to you. Realize that people make mistakes and if you decide to give this person another chance, forgive. Trust your instincts.

Answer 7

I've always been told if there is no trust there is nothing. But you can always gain trust back it would just take alot. But if you feel you could never be able to trust him the way you did before maybe you should just leave.

Answer 8

It is never the same, but you can forgive and move on. You become older, stronger and wiser.

I speak from experience, however I am now gathering the courage to divorce since much more has been lost in my marriage. We both tried for over ten years to keep it together, but have resolved it cannot be fixed anymore.

Good luck.

Answer 9

Hasn't happen to me but I've seen it with friends. Some were able to get over it like you said, with a lot of effort. Others it just kept happening because the spouse never left and basically gave the impression it was ok.

Answer 10

well its only been a month since my dh confessed out of the blue on cheating. i had no clue. since he said it was a one time thing, and i had contributed to marriage problems, we decided our marriage needed to be worked on, that we both needed jesus and that neither one of us wanted to seperate. he seems sincere so far in his efforts to change. in fact he seems like a different person now, its kinda odd but nice.
i hope it sticks!
as for trust he too has to earn it. i find myself getting suspicious sometimes if he calls and i hear background noise, or something. he doesnt get mad tho, he knows i no longer trust him and must bear with me. im thinking he will eventually earn it back i have no idea how long it will take him tho!

Answer 11

It will take time but as long as the person who lied is very much so making up for it you need try to let it go!

My saying goes like this......You can always forgive but it takes a special person to forget.