So there is this guy that I asked out...he said yes. We hang around in the same group of friends. I seriously think that he may be gay. Should I ask him? We are supposed to go out in a couple of days. I have been getting the vibe he doesn't really want to go. So I don't know. Should i call him and tell him that its ok or jsut wait till we go out and see if he brings it up?
2007-03-14 06:11:28 · 13 answers · asked by greenfunyoga 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
To clarify....I suspected he was gay before I even asked him out. Since i have known him, i have suspected but was never sure.
2007-03-14 06:39:43 · update #1
I've decided I am just not going to say anything. If he ever wants to tell me then he can. I'm not thinking about this anymore! I spent too much time today consumed in it!
2007-03-14 06:56:20 · update #2
Leave him alone....he's got to figure it out for himself.
2007-03-14 06:14:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, here's the deal. Sometimes when a person is asked about something they are insecure or not ready to talk about, they can take your suggestion as an accusation. Then they get defensive and confrontational, and your friendship (not to mention any possible relationship, obviously) is likely to suffer as a result. I mean, how would you feel if you had tried to hide something your whole life and someone came along and brought it up? He might wonder how many people have known all along but won't tell him they know, which might make him more insecure than ever. My plan of action would be to just be a good friend, encourage him to talk to you about whatever's on his mind, and in time, he'll tell you. And as for the date, just ask him if he really wants to go. He'll be glad to have the opportunity to cancel if he's gay, and if he's straight, he'll know to start acting like he wants it!
2007-03-14 06:17:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Go out and you will probably have a great time either way. If he's straight and your vibe is wrong (it happens), great. If he's gay, well you'll have a lot in common then and still have a good time going out once.
Don't confront him.
Remember, it isn't about how YOU feel about him being gay, it's about him.
Always make the issue about the other person instead of yourself, it helps to see things without the cloud of your own emotions.
2007-03-14 06:29:41 · answer #3 · answered by RJ 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It will totally kill the mood of your date if you ask him. Just go on the date and don't assume anything. At most, work into the conversation your positive and accepting attitude towards gays, and how you feel it's a shame that so many people are afraid to come out of the closet, because many people (such as yourself) are eager to accept them and reassure them. If he is gay, that will give him an opening for confession; if he isn't, then no harm done.
2007-03-14 06:25:44 · answer #4 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
girl you have been thinking about this the whole day! lol, you started asking what was a catcher, then trying to figure if this guy was gay and now if you should go out with him or not. i get the idea that you like him a lot, or you wouldn't waste your time thinking about it. I say you ask him if he is gay or not, and if he is you can maybe be friends, if he is not you go out, if he is bi then you come back and ask us again.
good luck
2007-03-14 06:17:39 · answer #5 · answered by rickyhunter 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
omg ur in the same situation that i was in
i think that u should give him a call or something
i found out that my ex was gay!!
u shoudnt wait until he brings it up u just have to
have the nerve to ask him!! so ask him
well good luck xxx
:)
2007-03-14 06:17:22 · answer #6 · answered by Marlen 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask him, but not knowing details about what has happened with you and him, I don't think that asking on here will help at all.
2007-03-14 06:46:38 · answer #7 · answered by Not Known To Me. The Voter ;~`}= 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you should say anything. If he is gay he would not be dating you and if he needed to tell you he was gay he would do it on his own time.
2007-03-14 06:26:18 · answer #8 · answered by jeenie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is most likely just not that into you. I know several guys who have faked at being gay in order to get rid girls they are just not interested in.
2007-03-14 06:24:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would wait until he brings it, I think. Otherwise he may get embarrassed and clam up. It may spoil a friendship.
2007-03-14 06:20:09 · answer #10 · answered by james c 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go out with him and be a "friend". If he wants to explain anything he will. If not, let it slide.
2007-03-14 06:16:55 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋