Do i have to pay child support if me and my ex are trying to come up with a legal aggreement on our own?

Question

My ex and I have 3 children together. We seperated in 2005. When we did we had just a verbal agreement on things. We had a big disagreement last summer and filed for child support. We have since reconciled and she feels she doesnt want to take child support. We want to go back to our old agreement. I still have a court date to start child support. Can she tell the court she refused the child support and that we are coming up with our own legal written aggreement?

My ex and I have 3 children together. We seperated in 2005. When we did we had just a verbal agreement on things. We had a big disagreement last summer and filed for child support. We have since reconciled and she feels she doesnt want to take child support. We want to go back to our old agreement. I still have a court date to start child support. Can she tell the court she refused the child support and that we are coming up with our own legal written aggreement?
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Ok follow up to my question;
I appreciate all the responses but it seems there was a misinterpretation. I got some sarcastic responses and people went off track to comment about me being a dead beat and not supporting my kids. Just because were going to see if i dont have to pay support though the court doesnt mean im not supporting my kids.our current agreement was I pay food,clothing,health insurance and there tuition and I have the kids every Tuesday and other weekend.All we want is this legalized.

Answer 1

You could try getting something notarized. Even just going to an attorneys office and sign something in front of him with the attorney signing it as well. If you still have to pay separate child support, maybe you and your ex-wife can come up with an agreement of sorts that the child support is still going to tuition and what not. If the child support is less than what you give her now, then you can give extra as needed. Even if you pay child support through the courts, you would still have to provide their insurance. Sounds to me like y'all have good communication, though and THAT is the most important thing for the kids. That they see that you are still working together for their benefit. Good luck.

Answer 2

Child support is the law it's not something that's agreed upon by the mother and father. Even if she waives your obligation to pay, in the mind of the law you are still obligated, and even if you had her sign something, if you get into another argument she could take you back and get every penny you owe from the time you separated on, because it's not up to her weather you pay or not. If I were you I would keep my appointment with the judge, let them hear out the information, like how much time you actually take you're children for visitation, and both of your incomes, all of this will effect the amount of support, and I would pay it. If she says she doesn't need it, have her open an account for the kids and stick it in there, so if something comes up where she does need it it's there. There's no harm in that.

Answer 3

I hope you have this in writing and signed by you and the ex. A verbal agreement is as good as the paper it is written on.

Get an attorney and yes, you should have been writing the checks for child support since it would have shown the court you were making an effort.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Yes you guys can come to an agreement and let the judge know. That doesn't mean that the judge will ok it though. You both need to keep the court date and the judge will not be happy that all this started because of an argument. Better to make your agreement legal now with the courts.

Answer 5

well i started child surport for my daughter me and her mom had a agreement as well when we went to court i was in shock when i hat to pay $400 a mth for surport and i had her the same amount as she did but they told us if we had made an agreement would could see a judge and get it done if it was no surport or 10 $ a week but i did what was best a pay it cuz i was with her for 5 yrs and she was always shady so i know im helping her take care of my child she is my life and im sure u feel the same about your kids but if she signs the paper at court sayin she dont want suport and u can see they kids as u both agree then go for it

Answer 6

All you can do is write out the agreement and take it to court with you. If the judge agrees to it, he will probably set the agreement as a court order to hold you to it. If he decides that it's not a fair contract, you'll probably pay child support.

Answer 7

Yes pay it. Your kids amazingly enough, will want something to eat each and every day. And surprise surprise, they will probably also want to wear shoes every day as well. Kids what'd r ya gonna do?

If I misunderstood the question and you are paying for your kids then Im sorry for my sarcastic answer. My opinion on this then is if you already pay but nothing is in writing that I think its best since you and your ex are fighting to get each and every penny documented or they can stick it to you some time down the road. Good job being a great dad. Wish more dads were like you.

Answer 8

No, if you agreed on your agreement then you don't have to. She's going to need to place a stop on that child support that she has started on.
The only time that you HAVE to pay child support is when she takes you to court for thinking that you won’t be paying her support.

Answer 9

I would think no. It is the law to support your children. If you choose to be a dead beat dad and she's ok with it then all is well but if things go bad between the 2 of you again(and they probably will) and she then decides she want's $ - you could be in for some trouble- you will then have to pay back child support.
Do the right thing and take care of your children and protect yourself.

Answer 10

You should keep the court appointment and let the Judge set up support arrangements. You may have another disagreement and won't be able to settle. Do it the right way (legally), your kids need that stability.