So my hubby is great.....but not all that physical. Um would like to get him interested or maybe just not so tired to cuddle up a bit.....every once in a while would do it for me. Any clues as to getting him interested?? maybe something subtle......cause I've tried all the unsubtle things....lol.
2007-03-14 05:26:37 · 13 answers · asked by blondegirl1472 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How long have you been married and how old is your husband? If he is much older then it could be a stage. Sometimes, in middle age the roles seem to change. The wife wants sex more and the husband wants sex less. It's funny and frustating how that works. When the guy is at his prime the wife wants a break. But, when the wife is at her prime the guy sometimes has to struggle .
I'll not go into cheating and other stuff like that. Instead, I will go under the impression that this is a mature marriage and there needs to be some more spark. I am a guy so I will give you a perspective from a guy. Hopefully, a woman can give you better advice from her point of view.
First of all, don't be too demanding of your husband. He might not be able to perform as well as he used to. Don't expect few hours of hot burning passion when he might not have the stamina to last very long. He might need some help in this area but don't you dare tell him that! However, you might want to visit your dr (alone) and get a few samples of viagra. 50 to 100mg. Wait until a romantic evening and have him take it during dinner and wine. Be careful on how you present it, again, so that you don't make him feel inadequate.
Secondly, he might have gotten comfortable with the marriage. He might think there is nothing wrong and he might just be satisfied with the way things are. But, he is missing something if you're need for intimacy is not being met. Please don't be offended here because it might not be about you and my next suggestion might just be carnal.
Start working out and taking care of yourself physically. Buy some new clothes to attract your husband. Don't go overboard here and buy clothes that make you feel uncomfortable. If you take care of yourself physically then the clothes won't matter as much. Guys are generally visually stimulated so you might need to attract him visually. Pretend you are dating again and do what you can to attract him yet tease him so that he doesn't feel pressured. Make him want to catch you. If you pressure him then he might get turned away. Be subtle.
Go on a vacation and get away from the distractions and responsibilities of life. He is probably providing for you very well and is expressing his love towards you via the things that he does.
When you do make love take it slow. Don't pressure him to do too much. You know your husband and you know what his personality is like. Work with who he is and let him know how much you enjoy what he is doing... y'know....
2007-03-14 05:29:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You just blew the theory that blondes have more fun!! lol. If he complains of being tired and you've already tried everything to interest him, make sure that he's eating healthy meals, taking vitamin supplements, etc. See that he goes for a thorough physical exam. Assuming that he's not getting his fun somewhere else, maybe a change of routine would also help. Check into a hotel for some "quality time" together and do something unexpected. Pick his brain to see what might excite him.
2007-03-14 05:51:35 · answer #2 · answered by bombastic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well try to lighten his load if he has too many chores take some of them up on your self to do and then have him some nice warm bath water ready and help him relax after work maybe slide in the tub with him and cuddle in the tub most guys dont like to cuddle the are say it and get it over with type but you could try a candle lit dinner and the relaxing bath people tend to like to talk when they are relaxing it would be a good time to ask him what he would like for you to do to spend more cuddle time with him
2007-03-14 05:38:18 · answer #3 · answered by family fan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After he gets off from work he probably is tired. So both of you get to bed early and have some time together in the morning. Set the alarm early if you have to. Good luck
2007-03-14 05:31:40 · answer #4 · answered by Ruthie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand his problem. by the time I'm off of work I just don't have anything left. I try to slow down a little at work and save some energy for my family. I would say try to talk to him about it and if that doesn't work try greeting him in something sexy and don't let him say no.
2007-03-14 05:34:08 · answer #5 · answered by Raistlin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This will sound over simplistic but a back rub always does wonders for me and for my guy, especially if it is "understood" it doesn't have to end in the "act." It relaxes us after a long, hard day and the affection and tenderness of it molds me...
2007-03-14 05:32:51 · answer #6 · answered by smecky809042003 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must and always sleep with him. If he is tired during going bed then try to arouse in the morning. Kiss...kiss is a very good medicine which I am sure you know. Try in the morning.
2007-03-14 05:39:42 · answer #7 · answered by dibesic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be the aggressor - slip into his favorite lingerie. Jump into bed nude. Wear short shorts. Give a massage. Write a love note. Talk about when you first met. Be creative, he'll come around.
2007-03-14 05:30:44 · answer #8 · answered by downinmn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
blondie, be careful who you ask for advice. Marriage isn't thought much of today, ask a mature,moral person questions like that. Make sure you communicate well with him, let him know how much physical effection means to you. :) Arum
2007-03-14 10:06:58 · answer #9 · answered by arum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start going out with your girlfriends. If he sees you dressed up and having fun, he may realize that he could lose you if he doesn't make some time.
2007-03-14 05:36:08 · answer #10 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋